Izzy takes center stage and clears his throat... smoothing out his hair he reaches in his coat and pulls out a roach; striking a match...coupling the fire; he lights it, and inhales deeply...... letting out a large plume of smoke that decipates in the air he looks about and gives an elated smile.

"LOVE!"

A complaisant voice sweeps the crowd his eyes gaze into the null.

"An intense feeling of deep affection, fondness, tenderness, attachment, and endearment..." 

He pauses for a second to let those words register with those in front of him .

"Dear... oh dear LadyFighter, when we first met and you laid me out with a nice shiner I knew you had my heart! My fondness for you burns with the power of a million suns! Struck with affection and intense feelings for you, with mindless conformity I pick up my gun for you, and go to war! My heart so tender for you I wear my alliance to you with pride! My attachment to you is like an addiction worse then herion so be my drug and continue on! So with this I bid you many blessing sevenfold and honor your name with this competition! Best to show there love for my lady will win 10 creds!  

*See RULES and MORE here*

Competition Starts NOW & Ends Thursday at 00'00

"Yo Izzy possible to extend this comp to the end of Thursday? Rather than the beginning. Need more time man!!!!" Perrin laughs evilly

No problem, Ill exstend it to Friday 00'00

For you, my love.

Ladyfighter, Ladyfighter, fight me a lady
I'll sweep you off your feet, you could be my baby

I saw you standing far away, I watched you from afar
I drove past you creeping, slowly from my car
You didn't notice who I was, or what I tried to do
I stole your chapstick, nail clippings and your tissues too.

I can't help but be stealthy, I can't help but be chilled
Cause you're a Godfather now, and would probably have me killed
I sit outside your HQ most every day and night
I watch you in the bathroom, I dont know, it just feels right
So silly are my feelings, but of true love I am certain
I also took your slippers and your inner shower curtain.

I love to sit outside your house and mess with all your stuff
I'm the one who steals your hose, I just can't get enough
Sometimes I take it way too far, but it shows how much I care
I cut the brake lines on your car, and save you unaware
You think I've just come randomly, but this has been my plan
Soon I hope to win your heart, for me to be your man
I love you deeply, with all my heart, I do not care who knows
If you were a stand up comedian who sucked, I'd go to all your shows

When you were in your HQ, I put a tracer on your car
So even when you run away, I'll know right where you are
I can't help all these feelings that come rushing through my head
I can't help that I fall asleep, every night beneath your bed
I listen to you breathing soft, I've never heard you snore
I catch all your dead hairs that fall, and drool upon your floor

What I'm trying to tell you, is that you make my life complete
If you would profess your love I think that would be neat
I love you more and more each day, some days I cannot cope
I've braided all your pocket lint, into a sturdy rope

So please oh please, just accept my love, and take me for your whore
I promise I wont embarass you and write you public poetry anymore

Sincerely yours,
Stud of the Hour

Winchester.

Sorry here's another one, I know I said I wouldn't
But you've yet to message me, and tell me that I couldn't
I think you are so beautiful, you haunt my every dream
I want to write good poetry, but I just can't keep it clean
I love you from your sexy feet, up to your sexy hair
I love your skin and features and I steal your underwear
Please don't take this the wrong way, I'm not a total creep
But when I try to go to bed, I count you instead of sheep

You're always there, so fine and fit, I think you are the one
I just don't want to turn you off, I'm scared that you will run
The other day when your RHM Perrin was nowhere to be found
I had him drugged and hidden somewhere deep under the ground
I dressed up in his clothes, and I stood beside your desk
Just being there, so close to you, would help me with the rest
When you were not looking, I smelled your hair, so nice
I don't need drugs or alcohol, you are now my vice

I know you're strong and powerful, I like that in a wife
I've been dreaming of your love, and will for all my life
The ways that you've effected me, too numerous to count
The love I have to give to you, cannot be measured by amount
Bring on the creepy some may say, so here it comes again
I will be your lover and kill all the other men
You and me are destined, or so my teddy bear has said
I can't let your attempts to run, get inside my head

I need you baby in my life, I'll put you in the mood
Its easier with that roofie I just slipped inside your food
Soon enough, your eyes will close, and I will have my way
I'll put you in my car and drive, till nighttime turns to day.
When you awake in sexy clothes, and sexy lingerie
All your feelings of disgust will surely fade away
My love for you will be so plain, and impossible to ignore
You also cannot escape, because I've locked the passenger door

so this I say to you awaking, in my front car seat
Wouldnt us getting married, just be super duper sweet?
We're on our way to vegas, where marriage is no big deal
I've booked mobster theme chapel just to make it seem more real
Our love shall be, forever known, and sealed in holy bliss
I cannot wait to have our first, married couples kiss
"So please act enthusiastic, at least give true love a chance"
I say that very softly as I slowly remove my pants

Love you forever and always baby <3

Winchester

Alright love. This is the last one, unless its not :)

This was my chance, your whole crew was not there
I walked to your HQ and entered with care
I knew they were all at your bar celebration
I went to your office with anticipation
I called you yesterday and pretended to be
The Don from chicago's west side, Anomaly
I asked for a meeting, it was scheduled for soon
I knew very shortly you'd enter the room
The door opened slowly, your back was turned
Perrin came with you, I peered past and learned
My anger flared up and I sucked in my gut
I pulled the curtains closer and clenched my butt
It was only a moment and Perrin left her alone
I knew I could sweet talk her into my home
I crept from the curtain, and kissed her soft neck
She turned in a flash and swung at my neck
I caught it mid-air, and kissed up her arm
I spoke to her in french, I turned on my charm
Furious and angry she prepared to yell
I pulled out a rag, and asked her to smell
The chloroform worked and she fainted with grace
I layed there a moment and touched her soft face

A short while later I helped her out of my car
I drove for a while, my house was quite far
My basement was ready, I'd been prepared for this time
When my true loves attention would fully be mine
I pulled from the corner an old wooden table
Upon which was a slide projector, which I said was able
To show you the pictures I've taken of you
While you were resting and addressing your crew
Another box from under the table I took
Your lips start to quiver, your body then shook
I could tell by your face, the disgust was quite clear
It was then that I showed you, I had cut off my ear
I created a picture of you in a beautiful pose
I used my severed ear and created your nose
"Perfection in Beauty" is what I had called it
I reached down my pants and pulled out my wallet
Inside there were slides which I kept close to my member
It kept my junk warm in cool months like september
From my wallet I pulled my favorite slide
A picture taken from your bathroom, my prefered place to hide
So graceful were you at this wonderful hour
Totally nude as you emerge from the shower
I winked at you softly and your forehead I kissed
You were tied to the chair so you couldn't resist.

I promised to return you to your HQ that day
But for the time being I asked you to stay
I put in the next slide, this one was less creepy
I took it while you layed on your bed looking sleepy
I took out the picture I had made for you
I wiped off the blood and the excess glue
For the hair I used yours, the dead hair and some string
I took a recording of you in the shower(you sing)
I stuck it to the back, of the picture with glee
And listen to it and think of what we could be
Those soft supple wrinkles by your eyes when you're sceptical
I created from the skin that surrounds my right testicle
Your chin I created with the ever-most care
A small bag coloured beige filled with your bathtub drain hair.
I shaped it and molded it perfect to your chins feature
If this was pirate bay i'd be your seeder and leecher
Slowly and carefully I lowered my face
And thanked you so softly for seeing my place
I covered your face with the rag from before
Your eyes drifted slowly, down to the floor

You awoke with a startle in your office alone
You looked around quickly and picked up your phone
Before you could dial, you became fully aware
Upon your desk sat a lock of your hair
A note that said "Baby I love you forever"
"Oh by the way, I'm keeping your sweater"
Shocked that it wasn't just a really bad dream
You opened your mouth and started to scream
I could hear it from where I sat parked down the street
I turned the car on, my mission complete
As I slowly pulled out under the street light above
I knew you now shared my unconditional love

Love you girl <3

Winchester

Roses are red and violets are blue,

Nothing I can write will match Winchester,

Admire and love is all I can do

For that weird guy will be the winner.

JimmyD changes his mind

Lady fighter, oh sweet ladyfighter,

How I want to kill that Winchester

He tries to steal and win your love from me

Filling your head with his crazy poetry

Do not fall for him, he is clearly sick

If you want, I can shoot him in the dick.

He stalks you and forces his odd love for you

It is time you move on to someone new

I will take a bullet for you, my sweet

And kiss you from head to those sexy feet

Mornings I will make you breakfast in bed

And make sure you are always so well fed

I want you to be fat, where you cannot move

You won’t be mobile for the things I want to do

Oh, the things I want to do to you

Are unfounded, original, and so new

I want to make you scream and shout

By pulling all your soft hair out

I want to wear your sexy robes

As I kiss your lips and earlobes

I want to tie your arms up high

And tickle you from pits to thigh

I want to dress you in all blue

Then bark as I rip it off you

Winchester cannot compete

He does not match my love for your feet

I’d make you sigh in ecstacy

As I nibbled on your chubby feet

I want to rub you down with lotion

Made of lard, my secret love potion

You’ll learn to love my special ways

And love me forever and always

I want to carve “Jimmy” in your arm

Even if it means you have to face some harm

It is will show you’re all mine and shut the doors

To others unaware that I am truly yours

Lady Oh Lady please let down your hair

I saw you from a far and yes I do stare

I don't care who sees, and Jimmy? Oh please

As you can see, I'm Sosa,  Love Costa

My rymes flow with ease they'll put you to your knees

These other girls are fleas, compared to the Queen B

I gotta hiya this fight'a to put out my fiya

These otha fools are lieyas with long pants

Where's my lighta?

I will build you an ark to show case me heart

Thats LOVE girl, fuck hugs girl, this OUR world

This sosa baby, yo true love, yo slim thug,

yo milk dud, yo love bug, Yo main G

You a Lady in the street but a freak in the sheets

No one adds up to Sosa, they step up  get subtracted

Oh yeah and Winchester and Jimmy

Better scribble out dem rymes you were gonna spit

I'm pretty sure they shit, not fit fo my spit to hit it

Imma real rappa, a head choppa, A lock poppa

Step to me like poppa Johns and you'll get served

with what you deserve

Fuck it imma curse, til I'm in a Hurst, yes my words hurt

no need to alert, the paramedics, they'll make you go, Lock Jaw

when you think its ova, I'll hit you, with a curve ball

Perrin and No walk on stage, the crowd goes wild, women throwing their clothes at them. Perrin picks up his guitar while No puts on his hoodie. They both nod at each other and Perrin begins to play a tune, huming to the microphone at the same tempo as the tune. Women start fainting purely at the smooth tone Perrin is producing. Perrin takes a deep breath....

Ohhhhh Lady!!!!

You knew that I was always shady

But you looked beyond my cold black heart

And found a way to give me a start

In a world, full of war and blood

You gave me a chance and your kindness hit me like a FLOOOOOOODD!!!!

 "Everybody"

LADY!!!! WE LOVE YOU SOOOOOO

LADY!!!! I WAS SO LOWWW

LADY!!! WE WONT STOP NOOOO

LADY!!! WE ALWAYS KEEP LOVING YOUUUU

I remember the day when you made me your hand

I remember the day when you said  I should play in a band *Bitch I can't play*

But I will never forget the day you finally said I'm alrightttttt

That was the day when I knew that I loved you

That was the day when I knew you were mine

Forever and ever and ever and everrrrrr

I wish I could find someway to tell you

But everytime I come close, I feel like I have the flu

My heart beats strong but I can't control myself

When you look at me I feel like those books on your shelf

Do you even knowwwww

 *Everybody*

LADY!!!! WE LOVE YOU SOOOOOO

LADY!!!! I WAS SO LOWWW

LADY!!! WE WONT STOP NOOOO

LADY!!! WE ALWAYS KEEP LOVING YOUUUU

Turns to No

"Hit it bro."

No jumps up to the microphone, grabbing it and putting it close to his mouth. Hands in the air and making slow thrust movements with the air. Women start screaming, trying to climb over the security, their arms out stretched, trying to grab at No's groin.

So let me bring it back to the hood yo,

Remember when we used to be thuggin in da hood

streets were cold, life werent good!

Then lady came along, she be a real boss, took us under her wings  (for real G)

Lady is so G that she is nearly a H!

took us to the new HQ where we could jam fam.

We came from the bottom, pain aint forgotten. 

Growing up with no cash, bummy feeling rotten!

Now lady got us out here, robbin' shottin' 

Making dirty money so we can be flossin'

So lady we got love for ya, we never forget what you done for us,

those dark nights in the new HQ (no lights G)

Now we livin' in luxury!

Champagne popping, Gucci suit rockin'

Lady on the side line dressed like Mary Poppins!

So were screaming F*** Delware city, they ain't popping shit

Lady pull the trigger tell that Durden boy to quit. 

Perrin finishes off with a nice guitar riff. The crowd goes mental, pushing the security guards down, women running up to the stage. One absolutely beautiful woman approaches Perrin while security try to regain control.

"Oh my god Perrin I love you sooo much please take me back stage" She asks. 

Perrin doesn't have to even think about this one, "Of course my pretty." The woman half faints before Perrin catches her. She says, "Oh one more thing my friend has to come too." At that moment a monstrosity approaches the stage, merely stepping?rolling?running down? the security like they were nothing. Perrin starts to mumble and cough, not knowing what to say. He turns around when he gets tapped on the shoulder to see No smiling. "I got this man." No approaches the beast and takes her hand. Perrin has a tear that rolls down his cheek and salutes to his brother. Best wingman ever!

Izzy listens to poems and songs after another thinking ladyfighter should be pleased. 

Perrin takes stage and sings his heart out with no, things get out of control but put back then the wilder beast attacks taking direct site on perrin, Izzy watches in awe and pops some ppopcorn in his mouth... he sees No jump in front and perrin salutes him whisking the babe away... The WilderBeast picks No up and undresses him and has her way with no....things that no man should ever endure Izzy would vomit but he had no stomache on account of being a zombie and all...No is plasterd to thefloor while the beast has her way with him a single tear runs down the cheeck of izzy and he salutes No...The Worlds Best WingMan

Izzy watches the show wrap up and awaits the next pperformance. 

Ahem.

I've prepared a few words is an acronymous fashion.

Lovely lady who laughs at the face of other lasses
Affectionate, always, unless the aforementioned
Dutch
Youthful and all the others yearn
Frisky, dare I say it?
Impeccable features
Getting everyone to fall in love with her
Has my heart
True love? Look no further.
Everlasting beauty
Remarkable lady

I thought I was her one and only. I thought, what we had was special... I... I...

*destroys everything in sight before taking his loaded weapon to a bar where he drinks himself numb and passes out in a puddle of tears*

eueeeghgh... *cries* fsdjfksd *cries some more* aaarfggghhh that bitch, i loved her!

*several weeks later he kills himself*

Izzy checks the time and looks about foe anyone else last minute...no one else steps forth so he takes center stage once more.

Thy lovely Lady has been listening from the crowd and managed to slip me a not during the wilder beast attack... So reading from the note we have a winner! For such a great performance the award and token of LadyFighter go to Perrin/No. One more bit Winchester, LadyFighter is disgusted flattered by your love for her but humbly asks for a 11.9 hours distance between you two at all times, she leaves a token of appreciation.

Success! You have transferred 5.00 credits to Perrin

Success! You have transferred 5.00 credits to No

 

 

 

 

 

 

Success! You have transferred 5.00 credits to Winchester.

Izzy looks about the crowd

*anyone who would still like to put in a word for thy lady is welcomed... also  have a little fun leta hear some love confessed about Dakine and Paulklint

wow, no one loves DaKine and Paul :(