Important Announcement 

This Announcement is brought to you by The Crandlej Experience featuring Camazotz.

My name is AgustinCastano.

I’ve being trying to make a name for myself with the local bigwigs, and I've started doing work for some of these families, but I'm pretty sure the conventional life of crime is really not for me anymore. I probably most enjoyed shovelling shit for Subtle, which says something about the rest of the work on offer. The problem I have is that I really don't care about the "family" and I don't particularly fancy taking my vows. I don't want to run anyone's bar and I certainly couldn't give less of a shit about someone shooting -4hs. I know that “being made” should be the pinnacle of my aspirations and the satisfaction of all my hard work, but, I don't know, it just seems all so...boring.

I guess that is because nothing ever changes around here. There are too many families comprised of too few characters. I'm sick of hearing from a cardboard cut-out Godfather saying what he thinks he should be saying about his next never-been-heard-of auth and how deserving he is. Then we are all forced to sit through tedious platitude after tedious platitude, about how great the guy is going to be before he retreats into his HQ never to be seen out in the public again. That doesn’t appeal to me. I’m sure eventually, there will be some sort of dispute, months down the line, that we'll know next to nothing about before seemingly irrelevant people tumble in the name of families they never got near to be part of.

As fun as all that sounds, I don't really fancy giving my life for one of these guys who are so far from pushing the boat out that they aren’t even standing on the shore. In fact, I don't really think they deserve my effort or my hard work anymore. I don't want their promotions and I don't want to wear their colours. I think I deserve better. I think you deserve better. I'm tired of seeing the white flags waving as everyone capitulates to tedium; I'm tried of waiting for someone to do something different and more than anything else, I guess I'm just tired of taking their fucking say so.

As nobody else wants to offer an alternative, I guess I should probably do that myself. It is high time I carve out my own small piece of the pie, rather than work for six months to pick up someone else’s scraps. I'm going to start my own gang, my own crew, my own family of misbegotten tearaways who want something for themselves. I am pulling in the white flag and I'm hanging out the skull and crossbones.

Interested? Good, because this is an open letter to the disenfranchised, the bored and the unappreciated. This is a call to anyone who wants to do something entertaining with their lives. This is me putting the word out about a new organization hitting the streets who intend to specialise in the darker, and let’s not kid ourselves, entirely more enjoyable side of this life.

Ladies and gentlemen, consider this my auth announcement.

<font color="rgba(0, 0, 0, 0)">My crew will be taking on contract work from anyone and everyone who can afford to pay for our services. You will be able to employ us to target anyone your heart so desires, provided you've got the cash to cover it. We can work on bodyguards or we can remove the target altogether. We aren't fussy so long as you're paying. That means Joe Nobody can hire us to wack Mrs Nobody or a Godfather can farm out some of his wet work that he doesn’t want to suffer any </font>blow-back<font color="rgba(0, 0, 0, 0)"> for. I expect much more of the former than the latter though.</font>

How do you go about employing us? Easy enough. You can find me over on IRC Avenue by the name of "Grin" a lot of the time. I'll be enjoying a cool beer in #shootingyourbgs. Whilst I promise to keep your identity secret, as that is the only way this venture will succeed, if you would prefer a little more added security, you can contact me at my mailbox ShootingYourBGs@gmail.com and we'll discuss prices.

Why will this be better for you? Well, if you want a conventional family where you'll get to the higher echelons of society before dying 6 months down the line; it won't. If you want to shoot people, target bodyguards and generally be a little miscreant, then this is definitely the place for you.

People have gotten fat, lazy and incompetent. It is time to make it a little harder to survive.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Dedshot browsed the flier that was being tossed around by the gale force winds...

Hrm at least the title is original....that being said, if the intent was to advertise the availability of their services...  One is left very puzzled what the frak they are talking about, there is this strange gibberish in the middle.

On the flip side, should this be a declaration of an...shudder... underground...

Well, how scary can something be when the intellect behind it cannot even speak properly...

I'm sorry that one has been left puzzled, DedShot. I once spent a fortnight with IG-88 and I guess some of his coding has evidently rubbed off on me.  10001000101. 

You can choose to dismiss this if you want, it changes nothing. It will still be proceeding and we might just carry out a contract on you for free. 

aha... so the key to this all is in your last missive...

"one"

Does that mean the number 1.....

Or 000000001 in binary!

Inquiring minds would care to know!

Our organization was employed to remove Techincal, RHM to Anomaly.

The price for this service was $3,000,000. 

If you are interested in employing us in the future to carry out your dirty work, feel free to contact me via the methods outlined previously in this announcement. 

Dedshot walked over to the crowd and pushed his way forward, thwacking everyone with his cane, making sure to hit the really obnoxious ones (ie "Those damn young punks") between the legs.  As he got to the front of the crowd, he saw everyone leaning over trying to read a note that was nailed in to the face of a butt ugly corpse.

THIS IS A TOTAL BLATANT LIE!

I personally witnessed his death, and I can prove that his death

See here!

Nov 14, '13 10:23 You witnessed Bubba hire someone to kill WACK! Technical.

My tall tale is much better than yours!