WhereAmI sighs, sets down the gun, blows out the candles, and then walks out the back door. He finds a familiar seat, an old swing hanging from a tree. He then begins to rock gently back and forth, holding onto the ropes and thinking of how one seemingly insignificant encounter could warp things in such a demented way...

It was just a normal day, WhereAmI met up with a few of his friends and began to head towards a restaurant he had frequented with them for years. The group consisted of an older gentleman named Jimmy, and a couple of younger boys Irish boys named Packy, Chris and Shamus. There was typical banter expected to be heard, a few jokes at a mother's expense and a little rough housing from time to time. They were a block away from their destination when WhereAmI remembered what the bathroom looked like last time he was in there and turned to the group and said,

"I'll catch up with you in a sec, I gotta take a leak and I'm not stepping foot in that bathroom again until they replace everything after that guy bled out in there."

Jimmy laughed and responded, "Big tough mobster WhereAmI can't handle a little blood, eh? Go ahead ya squeamish little Nancy, just be quick."

WhereAmI laughed and replied,  "Yeah, yeah. I'll just be a minute."

WhereAmI turned down an alley way, checked for people and then unfastened his pants. And as luck would have it, the second he started going a woman walked out from the back door stared him right in the eyes as soon as he turned his head. As soon as their eyes met the woman began to yell for her husband, she yelled a name that WhereAmI couldn't make out because of the noise of the city the distance between the two. WhereAmI sighed, as he started to finish taking a piss he began to ponder if he should just wait a minute to explain things to the woman's husband or just walk off. As he began to fasten his pants an older man with a scar on his kneck stepped out of the door and WhereAmI immediately began to apologize,

"I'm sorry, sir. I was honestly just taking a piss because I..."

The older man interrupted him saying, "That's not what she was yelling about, son. She was yelling because she thinks she recognized you. We knew your father and just wanted you to have this." The older man tossed a small notebook to the young man. "I know it isn't much but just take it."

WhereAmI was puzzled, he knew his father and the man was still alive. He began to think the couple had to be confused and said, "Sir, I've known my father my whole life and he's not the man to take notes. As a matter of fact he's still alive and I'd be happy to send him this way if you'd like."

The older man began to sigh, "I must be mistaken, but if you ever feel lost this it's a good book for answers and advice for a forgetful man in your line of work."

Before WhereAmI could respond the man looked like he had seen a ghost and slammed the door shut. WhereAmI could hear the distinct sound of multiple locks being locked. He turned to see Jimmy standing at the intersection. He tucked the small notebook into the back of his pants and jogged towards his friend. Jimmy looked startled and asked WhereAmI,

"What was that about? That guy is nuts you know..."

WhereAmI laughed, "I figured, but you'll lose a lot of friends questioning why someone is willing to talk to some nut, ya loon."

Jimmy socked WhereAmI in the arm and said, "Well I'd like to avoid looking after you but it seems you can't even remember not to talk to strangers long enough to take a piss. That's dangerous in your line of work."

WhereAmI laughed and replied, "And exactly what would you know about that, Officer Jimmy?"

WhereAmI noticed that Jimmy appeared to be eying the notebook as WhereAmI started walking towards the restaurant. Jimmy laughed and said, "Yeah yeah, whatever. Let's just get back to the diner already I'm starving and it's you owe me lunch."

-----

Two days later, it was raining something fierce when WhereAmI's phone rang. The boss gave him the day off, and told him to kick his feet up today because there would be a lot of work to do the next day. Smiling, WhereAmI turned to his nightstand where he had left the small notebook. He laughed and began talking to himself, "What's the worst that could happen?"

As he began to turn through the pages there were stories of dozens of men, even more names he recognized from the stories of old interacting with these men, and eventually he got to a section that mentioned Jimmy. Jimmy was a dirty cop, being paid by the same man he was currently being paid by. WhereAmI dropped the book after reading this section. It implied that a baby was stolen in the dead of the night by an unknown man and the father had his throat slit in his sleep that same night. WhereAmI began to feel dizzy and staggered towards the bathroom. He now knew that his questions of why he looked so little like his father had been answered. He began to vomit in the bathroom. He was so disturbed he didn't even make it to the toilet, he just began throwing up in the wash bowl. He staggered back to his bed and sat there studying and memorizing this little book. In particular, he focused on the rainy day "bank job".

It was a tale of how a man that was clearly disliked by his boss was set up to be shot by a cop on the payroll as the rest of the gang escaped in the opposite direction. There were details of a constant rain to excuse the officer losing sight of the others, a specific tag applied to the coat of the target so that the cop would know who to shoot, and a bank in another mob family's pay roll being paid to be empty of customers at the time of the robbery. This was the man who he believed to be his father's favorite set up for people with loose lips or guys that simply rubbed him the wrong way. He was so proud of it he did it three times before retiring the technique. WhereAmI, dazed at the information he had read, checked the clock. He was starving and he spent the whole day reading this book, it was nine o'clock. He quickly went down stairs, ate a piece of bread and went to bed.

-----

One morning about a month later, WhereAmI awoke to the sound of his phone ringing. He looked outside and it was still pouring, shaking his head he heard the phone ring again and immediately went for the phone. He answered and heard his boss sounding frantic. The don began to rant,

"You need to get down here quick, the conditions are perfect and my driver's gone missing. I think the stupid mick Shamus got drunk and ended up in someone else's bed or something because he's not answering the phone and neither is his brother Packy. I need to get this done today and I don't have time to wait for someone else. Get down here now or get out of town because if one more of you guys bails on me I'll kill the lot of you."

WhereAmI sighs and says, "I'll be down boss, just give me a minute to get dressed and find my gun, I'll be down as soon as I can be."

WhereAmI then threw on the first clothes he could find, put on his coat, tucked his gun in his coat and began to think about that book. He ran down the street towards Packy and Shamus' houses. They were neighbors and it was just a little out of the way, but he knew if he wanted to show up at a time expected he'd have to be quick. As he approached the house he saw a cop car parked out front, it was Jimmy's. Still nervous because it wasn't like Shamus or Packy to drink anywhere but the bar near them; WhereAmI decided to sneak up on the side window to check in on them. He looked in and saw blood on the floor. He immediately ducked and took off around the neighbor's house, through the yard, and sprinted inbetween the houses behind. He began walking toward his normal route and wondering if he was next. The boss had been talking about a job for almost a month now, and gave him hell for not volunteering to participate. He heard a rumor that someone thought Shamus was skipping on what he owed to the Don, but he never believed it. If he was, WhereAmI realized, WhereAmI vouched for him to join the family. This would come down on him as well.

After a walk talking himself into believing everything would be alright he arrived at the HQ. The HQ smelled of some chemical, it was so awful that everyone seemed to be covering their noses from whatever accelerant they had in the back of the van. The boss had a habit of tearing out the interiors of cars and burning it after a big job. He walked into the room towards the Don and the two others standing there. The Don tossed him the keys and said,

"Sorry for scaring you but we have to be ready in exactly 45 minutes and I like to have 15 minutes to make sure everything's ready once we get there and it'll take us about 30 minutes to get the van ready and in position."

The Don pats him on the back and then takes his white gloves off and begins to load the car. After arriving near the bank WhereAmI notices that the rain is really coming down and turns to the Don and says, "I need to take a leak, I'm gonna go into that diner real quick and take a leak."

The Don coughs and glares at WhereAmI. "Are you stupid, don't do anything someone might remember, we're about to rob a damned bank, take a piss in the alley or something."

WhereAmI gives a thumbs up and jogs around the building. He ignores the man carrying what appeared to be sink parts begins to take a piss and hears a man laughing. The man finally stops laughing and says,

"Hey jackass, There's a giant white paint stain on your trench coat."

WhereAmI's face turns white, he shakes his head, fastens his pants, begins moving his neck and turns to the man. He says, "Thanks man, my boss would kill me if I walked into work with this coat, you got a spare coat or something I can buy off of you? I'll give you triple what it was worth new."

"Huh, sure I have a spare in the back of my truck."

WhereAmI checks the street before walking out and notices his boss and the others are talking about the job and focused elsewhere. He quickly jogs to the van and tucks the coat by the pedals and grabs his boss' smokes. He tucks one of the long cigarettes into his pocket and then jogs up to the group and asks, "We about ready here?"

The Don turns and replies, "Yeah, just wait in the car for us to come running out and be fucking sure you keep the car safe and don't leave until everyone's in."

WhereAmI begins unrolling the cigarette and frantically cussing, "Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. What the hell can I use to stick this?" WhereAmI quickly just pulls out his shoe string, pokes the ends through the center of the paper, tears off the brown part of the paper and looks up. The men were now approaching the door so he switched trench coats. He was about to start the car when he remembered his gun was in the other one, he quickly grabbed that and then tried to start the car. It wouldn't start. He began to think of what he would be expected to do in this situation. He steps out of the van after checking the mirror for someone behind. He walks towards the bank, puts his shirt collar up and puts a hand over his face. He yells in the door, the car won't start. The Don then calmly tells him they'll just have to hoof it or steal one. He hands WhereAmI a bag. As they start heading towards the door, WhereAmI and the Don are two in the back of the group. WhereAmI gets his improvised white sign ready and as soon as they step out he hangs his little white square from his boss' neck on his back. The Don turns his head with eyes like a deer in the headlights and before he can say anything WhereAmI hears a bang. The Don's temple sprays blood all over him from the hole. WhereAmI turns and he sees the officer run off in the other direction through the rain. The other two keep running and turn down an alley. WhereAmI quietly draws his gun and follows. The bigger man pulls a key out from his coat, and they finally turn back to see the wrong man got hit. WhereAmI shoots both in the chest, then puts one in the head of each to be sure. He takes the key from the bigger one and drives to Jimmy's house as fast as he can.

WhereAmI parks the car in the neighbor's open garage and closes the garage door. He jogs into Jimmy's house and throws the door open. Jimmy's wife is home and WhereAmI points a gun at her, and says "Get in the basement or I swear to God I'll put two in you. If you make any noise I'll kill you." She begins balling and heads towards the basement. WhereAmI locks the door after she goes down and sits on the floor in the corner of the room that is adjacent to the wall with the front door Jimmy usually walks through when he gets home. Shortly after Jimmy comes storming in shaking and WhereAmI lifts his gun. Jimmy hears the faint sounds of his wife crying and reaches for his gun, but WhereAmI fires before he can get it out of its holster. WhereAmI walks up to Jimmy, kicks the gun out of his hand, and asks, "I could've lived with you being crooked. Hell I could've dealt with you probably having a hand in my father's death if you just would've told me. But you fucking lied to me and tried to set me up. You had a hand in an attempt to kill me. Then you fucking punks had the fucking nerve to use the my father's trick to try to kill me. So now I have to fucking ask, why?"

Jimmy begins to laugh, then coughs up some blood, "You would've done the same in my shoes. I just tried to play the game in a different way."

WhereAmI jabs his gun into Jimmy's eye, "Fine, but die knowing I'll kill your children, your fucking wife, and any fucking grand-kids you might have. Because I fucking wouldn't have killed you before I got my hands on that old journal you clearly recognized and realized just how fucked up everyone around me really is."

WhereAmI pulls the trigger, walks downstairs, and turns to Jimmy's wife. "I didn't wanna do this to you, I'm sorry but I truly plan to follow through with equal vengeance." The woman continues crying and begging for her life, but WhereAmI still shoots the woman inbetween the eyes.

He walks upstairs, sighs, sets down the gun, blows out the candles Jimmy's wife liked to light during the day, and then walks out the back door. He finds a familiar seat, an old swing hanging from a tree that he commonly sat on with his friends when they were visiting Jimmy's house. He then begins to rock gently back and forth wondering if Shamus really was skimming the boss. He begins to wonder if any of his friends actually valued their friendship, he begins holding onto the ropes and thinking of how one chance encounter warped his view of the things around him in such a demented way...