Scrump McGrump is a very mysterious character. 

She is quite hard to keep a look after. 

With her fists of fury, and anger to match,

it is quite easy to find wounds to patch.

Scrump McGrump loathes the weak.

If in her view, she'll grind her teeth.

And once she's got a person in a hold,

it's likely you'll find them fold. 

Scrump McGrump has a good time at the mall.

The security guards can't make her fall.

She'll snatch up dresses and make-up,

and she's quick to find a place to duck.

Scrump McGrump, though, is not wicked.

She has a pup who is often pett-ed.

It's a interesting world for Scrump McGrump.

She is out most nights shaking her rump.

After hearing Ascanius reading is poem, Meow thinks for himself

Damn! My RHM sure has some skills!

Very good poem Spike!

Meow starts applauding 

....is she single?