Frank woke up with a grumbling in his stomach. He though he ate well last night but his stomach told him a different story. As he turned in bed and elbowed a petite curvaceous broad he knew his memory was shot. He slowly rolled the dame off the bed and onto the floor and she thumped onto the hardwood with a barely audible sound but then she let out a queefy woosh and yelled in a high pitch voice. He must have picked her up last night at the Grand Opening of his new business the Ligambi Car Dealership. She grabbed a pillow and started emptying out the feathers on his head and he just kicked her forcefully until she quit and stormed off grabbing all her belongings and clothes.

Frank sat up and headed over to his favorite bottle of whiskey, he served himself a glass and slipped into his bath robe. He lit up a cigarette and jimmied open the window overlooking the street on the 5th floor of the Paradise Club headquarters. He exhaled a long puff and took a sip of his fine fine whiskey.

Down below the city was bustling with action. The movers were moving and the shakers were shaking. Business owners were getting racketed and he could see a small group of Paradise city enforcers walking their beat. Aliens and Ninja were walking around with CarlosDanger. They weren't people you messed with, their long coats hid some serious firepower and Ninja had a way of sneaking around people in the blink of an eye and sending little spinning stars that originated from some place far far away into the back of his enemies. Alien was no less bewildering with his large oval eyes he somehow teleported around and made others do his bidding without even saying a word. And CarlosDanger was spooky too but Frank couldn't tell exactly why. All of a sudden a long legged voluptuous woman dressed like a fox made her way to the group and handed them some items. This must have been Sydney, Frank had only heard stories and whisperings about her in the local bars. She had some clout in this city and was someone to obey or steer clear of.

Further down the street some out of towners were working too. On one street corner you could see a large black limousine stop and out jumped an incredible head of hair. A well-dressed Don with a winning smile was offering up compliments and some support to a group of ladies on the corner. All of a sudden he backhanded one of them and did some karate kick in the air knocking her purse clear out in the street. One of his many associates went and picked up the purse and pulled a large sum of money from it, then handed the purse back to the girl. This must have been @PantiesBeDroppin and he was waving his finger in a no-no-no sign in front of her face and then it looked like he was about to back slap her again but he stopped short and just started to caress her cheek and whisper in her ear. She got on her knees and started pleading but he made her stand right back up and twirl around. He then slapped her little booty and she walked off with the other girls dressed like forest nymphs. He knows karate and his pimp hand is way strong definitely someone to watch out for. Oh and that was some awesome hair.

Further down the road a ridiculously ripped bronzed statue of a man was walking towards the Strip. He had on tiny yellow euro-undies and a yellow baseball cap. He wasn't fucking around as he was surrounded by a dozen girls all of them also equally ripped and in complete fitness health. It looked like they were all headed to some Mr.Universe and Ms.Universe competition but then as he approached closer I could tell he must have been in his sixties. You know how when your at the beach and you see far far away, almost like a mirage, an incredible girl in a fire red bikini, and then when shes fifteen feet from you it's an old lady with pasty white skin and you can't believe your eyes. Well it wasn't like that. I mean he was old and certainly ripped but I thought Adonis was walking for a second there. I could tell he was carrying some boxing gloves and as soon as he made it to the opposite corner as PantiesBeDroppin he stopped and yelled across the street. The girls cheered and yelled like amazon women and he said "Panties I am here, It is me AssChicken!!! Come and face me!!" Suddenly AssChicken started running towards the limo but Panties got in and sped away. It was then I noticed a goat running down the streets and then suddenly some Angels from the sky came down and shot it with a tranquilizer put him in a cage in the back of a truck and led the poor Goat away........ who knows what his fate may be.

Frankie shook his head and rubbed his eyes he wasn't sure if what he just witnessed was real. Las Vegas was getting crazier by the day and really wasn't disappointing him these days...... sheesh!

A week had passed since Frank had last peered out into the streets to look at all the comings and goings. He settled in to his favorite chair on the balcony of his apartment. He pulled out his pack of cigarettes and uncorked his favorite bottle of red wine. Nothing like some good friends to join you when you're doing some people watching.

Down the street there was a funeral profession. Several long hearses were driving solemnly down the boulevard. Usually there might be maybe 5 or 6 cars and they weren't always so elegantly adorned.

This procession was something altogether different.

The first hearse was powered by some goats. Like Iditarod dogs they were all pulling a large coffin with a statue of an onerous large Goat with huge horns and a crown on it's head . They were bleating the whole way down the street all sad and downtrodden. Frankie had never seen so many goats together at once. A large string of cans attached to the rear of the coffin was klick-klacketing on it's way down the street.

The next hearse was immediately proceeding the goats and it was being pulled by some weird ship like thing called a Bebop. There was a cutout of a slender looking man with a cigarette in his mouth. He was wearing a simple blue suit and had large fluffy green hair. Lots of different people were following that procession but one girl in particular stood out. She was kicking the coffin in frustration and she looked real pale and deathly. She had what seemed like fangs.

After that spectacle another intricate hearse was moving towards Frankie's building. It was an orange colored casket. This dead Godfather's followers were passing out oranges and there was a small cart bringing up the rear that was pressing the oranges into juice for everyone to enjoy.  Frankie couldn't believe his eyes he was wondering what else would follow.

The next dead man was walking, amazingly....... He was only wearing a bath robe and some boxers while dragging his flip flops on the floor. Behind him was a giant mechanical man swinging a huge hammer down on what seemed to be a little gnome. Frankie started to wonder what was in his red wine bottle. He shrugged his shoulders and took another sip and puff of his favorite cigarettes. 

Bringing up the rear there was a simple black coffin and behind it being pulled on a huge cart with wheels was a weird tower with coils going all throughout it. Suddenly it stopped and someone next to it threw up a switch. The sky illuminated with electricity and all types of lightning and streaks coursed thru the skies. Frankie's hair on his arms was standing on end as if activated.

Finally the last procession came thru and there was loud and out of this world music blaring from this caravan of what seemed like gangsters, but they were a little weird. Frankie thought about it and the word "Guido" came to mind. The all had their hair slicked up into weird boxed shapes and their shirts were off and they were all fist pumping in the air.

Frankie stepped back from the balcony and shut his glass doors and pulled closed the blinds. Ok that was plenty for one night. He wondered what on earth he was going to dream in his sleep after having witnessed all that!