WhatJustHappened was passed out on a public bench near his HQ that was still falling apart. He notices RemusLupin approaching him and he quickly gets up, salutes and says,

"Great choice of an HQ boss, I'm sure I'll have a place to sleep and return home to after a long day's work earning money for you in no time."

WhatJustHappened hears a loud thunder strike and turns to see two of the members of the crew charred just outside of the HQ.

"Obviously the gods deciding to strike them down had nothing to do with your choice of HQ. I mean, they wouldn't do that no matter how ugly... I mean beautiful! Our HQ is. They're gods after all, why would they be jealous of an HQ with such a lovely garden. Especially now that there's only about 8 windows worth of glass in it. You did amazing sir and I can't wait to follow your future decisions as well!"

Suddenly a terrible odor hits WhatJustHappened and he sees RemusLupin walking away at a quickened pace. He turns to see PepeLePewPew approaching him. The stench grows worse and worse as he approaches. WhatJustHappened believes he can hear Pepe trying to speak to him but he can't stop covering his ears and eyes because to a now homeless man who sleeps on a park bench the putrid smell was unbearable and burning his eyes and ears. As the pain begins to fade away WhatJustHappened passes out and has terrible nightmares of the smell coming back.

After awakening from his terrible nightmares the now much smellier WhatJustHappened stumbles into the streets. He finds a gas station and purchases a couple gallons of gas and wanders down to his local post office. He walks in, starts splashing it all over the walls and lights the post office on fire. He then walks out into the streets where confused mobsters are trying to figure out how to earn money at a decent pace without robbing the local post office. He then approaches the crowd.

"I would like to thank you all for accepting my invitations to be here today for this speech. If you do not hear me out I will start travelling from city to city burning down post offices to cripple the mob. So sit down in the street somewhere and shut up!"

"I've come here today to discuss the removal of the French Canadians from our streets, in particular, PePeLePewPew. Their obnoxious odor is starting to become a serious problem for the homeless members of our society. What does this have to do with you? With the economy bouncing back it has everything to do with your own livelihood. The French Canadians are starting to get jobs! You fools are giving them a reason to settle down and spread their stink all throughout the land! This is a problem that needs to be dealt with."

A random man in the crowd yells, "Yeah he's right," and then proceeds back to his spot. With his hand still up high WhatJustHappened yells,

"We must remove the Canadians!"

WhatJustHappened then realizes his arm was in a position that meant something entirely different, and starts vehemently shaking his arms back and forth,

"No I did not mean like that! I mean let's deport them all back to Canada. I mean even the non-Frenchies too! At best they're a race of overly polite individuals who are terrified of the dark. Not long ago I came across bathroom graffiti so despicable I can barely stomach the act of repeating it. It said 'Your mom is a nice lady'. Is that really the type of graffiti we want to see in our bathrooms? Of course not! We want things like, 'For a good time call Whoreable' followed by her actual phone number. Hold on, before we continue..."

WhatJustHappened pulls out his gun and starts shooting the light bulbs in the lamp posts.

"It'll be dark soon Canadians, scurry out of here!"

The crowd watches as a number of supposed mobsters begin running away with a terrified expression on their faces after realizing they might get left out in the dark if they stick around. WhatJustHappened grabs a man trying to get away.

"Look at their heads! You can tell a Canadian apart from the rest by how the rest of the head separates itself from the jaw when they talk!"

WhatJustHappened releases the frightened Canadian and continues speaking,

"Now that we know who they are and how to spot them, we need to come up with a plan to get rid of these heavily French influenced bastards before their culture rubs off on us. Do you really want your children growing up in a French influenced society? Of course not! We must stand together against the odor, stand together against the aggressive levels of politeness and stand together for America!"

And then just as WhatJustHappened was about to continue ranting the crowd dispersed as PepeLePewPew began walking in their general direction.

Reason was listening to a man talking, more like wailing, maybe a little balling, about French Canadians and Canadians in general too. "God, what an uneducated man! I will slap him silly!" Reason thought. He decided to move up a notch in the crowd until he heard gunshots. "Holy shit!" Reason ducked as he didn't know if he were to continue shooting. "Oh, shit! The lights are out! " Reason was starting to run away as he was petrified if the dark until the man grabbed him and started talking about his jaw. When he released him, Reason pushed the man aside, adding a, "sorry."

"People! People of America! People of Detroit! Listen to me! Canadians! Stop hiding behind a street lamp! You look like flies over there! Oh...wait. Those are flies."

Reason turned his head to notice the real Canadians. 

"You, there! Stop hiding from the dark! Embrace it! I am scared of it too, but there is nothing more dark than the inside if this man's brain!" Reason pointed to WhatJustHappened head. 

"Sorry if I hurt your feelings by the way, ay. Canadians! Here me! We have been too long sitting in the dark! I mean... the light! We need to unite and stand for what we believe in! We need to show Americans how polite they can be! Obviously, they'll just sue us for trying. Now, we can run away from these obese people! Or fight them Canadian style!"

Some of the crowd cheered. All the Canadians part of that crowd took out their maple syrup bottles and squirted them at the Americans. The ones that weren't fat were blown to the wall and stuck there while the other fat ones were either licking the maple syrup from themselves or the people stuck on the wall. 

"Not what I had in mind, but that'll do! Sorry for the inconvenience!"

WhatJustHappened removes himself from the wall and begins violently shaking his fist,

"Politeness of this nature can't be tolerated! You can't apologize after calling my thoughts dark, you have to call me a cunt you worthless Canadian bastard! There is no reasoning with Reason. They've resorted to maple syrup based violence! Grab your pitch forks, your torches and your rifles! Today is the day we attack the Canadians!"

WhatJustHappened leaps onto Lion and begins pummeling him, eventually dragging him towards a truck and stuffing him in the back of it while the rest of the crowd either continues licking the maple syrup off or standing around pointlessly apologizing and occasionally shaking in their boots when one of the local residents turns a lamp or a light off.

MetallicA puts down their axes and sticks cause they hear a uproar aboot polite canadians

while we may be based out of san fran we've heard there is definitely some stinkers in Canada, that PePe guy hes got a odour that follows him we're told

MetallicA packs their stuff up for a trip north of the border

we've heard the booze is better and more potent there so were on our way!

and that bacon is to die for along side some poutine and some lobster rolls

Bonjour, I am NOT going to continue talking to you in French, because to do so would be to indulge the utterings of the idiot who first spoke here.

Seriously, what THE FUCK is this IDIOT talking about?

Reason was spraying maple syrup down a fatty's belly and heard someone utter a french word. He made his way through the crowd with the occasional people rolling in his way with the Indiana Jones's theme song. His maple syrup bottles were running low on fuel and he needed to find this person. He might be the hero in this dark time. "Damn it!! Where is he?!!"  Reason thought to himself. Now, he was finally out of the sticky stuff and the fatsos were ganging up on him. It was like a bad horror movie. It seemed like a crowd of zombies crawling towards him in slow motion. Reason never felt more scared. He thought that the light bulbs going out were terrible, but this... This was unimaginable.  The light was dimming around him, they were coming for him. He closed his eyes and wished it would all go away. "Wait, what's that? There are no more thuds. Did they really just disappear?" Reason opened his eyes and saw all of them on the floor with their hands up towards the sky. Beavers. Beavers were smacking them with their tails. "Wait, over there! It's him!" Reason saw the guy and said:

"Salut, mon cher patriote! Let's teach this man a lesson!"

The man gave Reason another maple syrup bottle and a Canadian bacon gun. "Far range. Nice!" Reason saw WhatJustHappened jumping on Lion and throwing him in his truck. "The pedo van! No!" Reason pointed to WJH and the man nodded and they both ran towards him. The guy next to Reason poured his gooey maple syrup in the bacon launcher and Reason shot it at WJH. The man toppled over, stuck to the truck and Lion was set free. 

"That is what you get for hurting the good people on this Earth! I will leave you here and make you think why you lost. The battle isn't over and it's far from being lost. Mes frères! Marchons!!!!!!!"