It had been ages since a good paper. Truly ages. Most recently, The Potato was circulated through the six cities to rave reviews, and not long before that The Cosa Nostra Times had a fair run. But prior to those two nothing major had cropped up, at least nothing worth mentioning. 

It was hard to believe, that in a time like this, with so much going on in our world that no one had decided to give the papers a shot. There was so much news to be told, so many secrets to reveal. 

And this was one reporter who had the desire to enlighten the world. That coupled with the fact that he would never be able to live a full and happy life had spurned him to start something new, to put into publication that which the majority of people were thinking and worrying about.

He did not expect it to be well received, at least not by the ones with the privilege to speak openly in our world. But those forced into solitude and silence would read it, and learn from it, and perhaps one day act on the things they had read. 

Issue One did not take long to write, as so much had happened in the hours prior to it. The Reporter typed his Saturday evening away and was able to release the first edition in the early hours of Sunday.

The Bloodlined Gazette

Bringing you news and salt from the grave
Issue I

Purging Continues
Imagine that.

For months now our world has been drenched in the blood of the innocent. "Purging," a practice first introduced a few years ago by those salty bastards, has been twisted into an even greater evil by our current Niflheim/Who-err/Fuckerish(ish) overlords. Every few weeks or so our tyrants rip into their own cities while they sleep. Only those who are "trusted" or in the circle are safe. And not even all of them are. We've seen Disorder turn on multiple allies, "brothers," investments, and even lifelong friends. No one is truly safe from the purge; once you become A. too powerful B. unnecessary or C. suspicious in any way you will be shot, regardless of your standing with your crewleader or godfather.

And that's the saddest part: not that our overlords are pruning the population at a regular pace (although it is despicable), but the fact that "leaders" and "godfathers" just stand aside and allow their people to be killed in cold blood. They have no honor, no sense of pride, only the desire to stay alive and stay relevant. What do they care if 90% of the population has no respect for them? 

But can we blame them? The regime has already shown that if you deny them the right to prune your family of threats that you yourself will be disposed of without a shred of regret. 

You can argue for the practice - it is indeed true that it works. It is keeping threats at bay and weeding out potential rogues. It is the sole reason this regime has lasted so long - their sheer ruthlessness and unconcern for collateral damage makes it nearly impossible to sneak through the cracks. It may be months still before someone with the right skillset and set of cojones gets through and takes the shot.

But the effect it has on the innocents, and moreso our world as a whole, is devastatingly negative. Bloodlines that go back eons leaving our shores forevermore, prominent bloodlines at that. People whose ancestry helped build our world, helped shape what we are today, gone either forever or until this regime is finally removed.

Even more terrible still, is what it is doing to those wide eyed new bloodlines fresh off the boat. Before they even get their appetite whetted, they are struck down for reasons so simple and petty such as: We didn't know you, you looked dangerous, or you were online while there was a rogue. BAM! Their children never receive letters detailing the new world, and therefore are never tempted to travel across the Atlantic looking for new opportunities in a new world. Or worse yet, they get letters detailing how awful this side of the pond is, and warning them never to stray across it. Our numbers continue to dwindle, day after day, and our world slips further into decay and despair. 

There seems to be no foreseeable end to the injustice of this practice, lest the gods intervene at last, as so many have prayed for for so long. Glory be to them when their wrath comes down.

Being Spotted During a Rogue Now Punishable By Death
Like pretty much everything else.

A recent development has irked the population as last night several innocent mafiosi were gunned down in cold blood by Chicago and Las Vegas cronies simply for being active in our world while a rogue roamed the streets.

When attempts to find the rogue through witnesses came up empty, our overlords saw fit to just kill anyone they didn't know who was around at the shot time in question. Rather than admit their own failure and botched handling of the situation, our "leaders" blamed the rogues, their fellow leaders' hands, and the dead themselves for the events.

To: okayyy
From: Pollution
Sent: Aug 12, '17 08:44
Subject:

You were killed because of rogues. Unfortunately we couldn't find them and they were too cowardly to own up to what they had done so we were left with no choice but to kill everyone active at the time of the shot. If you were innocent then we're sorry. Please ensure you find the rogue and let them know your feelings about being killed for their stupidity.

Now this reporter has always thought Pollution's line to be an honorable one, if perhaps a bit rough around the edges. But it's now evident that disorder is rubbing off on him (in several ways) because this is as cunty an explanation as can be.

No shit the rogues didn't "own up" to what they'd done. They're fucking rogues. They just got a shot off without you idiots finding out who they were, why the ruddy hell would they come out into the open?

You were left with several choices other than killing everyone active at the time of the shot. You could have waited, made a list of suspects, and then approached their respective leaders/hands and got the skinny on them. After some careful detective work and intelligent deduction, you could have discerned the rogues and took action without shedding the blood of innocent people.

But that would take time, effort, and most importantly, brains, which it is blatantly clear that the majority of the leadership has very little of. It would be much easier to just shoot all the suspects and wash your hands of it.

Except for, hold on, one little issue. Even after dropping several mafiosi from several cities, you still didn't catch the rogues.  And you lost a crewleader because of it.

Then you have the audacity to tell one of the victim's children that they should track down the rogues that you, with all your connections and associates could not find yourself. Ridiculous.

A word of warning to anyone online while a rogue is active, (because it's pretty clear there will be many, many more) you will be given two choices: You can either A. join them and help and die or B. suicide because you're sure to be lumped into the group that gets killed off while they search for the rogues.

Weekly Douche-Light
Putting the spotlight on a new douche each week.

This week's douche was a toss up. I could have highlighted quite a few people here. My first instinct was to go with Pollution, as he is so clearly a giant douche. But I also thought Kharon deserved to be shown the spotlight, since he/she/it has so rarely seen light at all in it's lifetime. But I already hit Pollution up above and Kharon can wait for another time. JoeKing, Orange, and DanGleeballs all get an honorable mention, but I only have so much in the printing budget and can't afford to do everyone at once. That kind of thing is for people like Ryann.

This week's douche of the week is Tobias.

You may not know him, he isn't exactly anyone special. His ancestors haven't done anything of note, and he has been almost entirely silent for the majority of his life. He is the definition of a monkey, with no noticeable skills other than the click click of his gun. 

Once he grew a pair and started coming out into the streets, it became quite clear why he was so terrified of doing it previously. His grasp of the English language is par to that of a fourth grader and his intelligence is lower than your average Keypunch. He routinely manages to come across as an ignorant dick with a bad speech impediment, wounding the ears of passerby worse than his gun ever could.

Speaking of his gun, he seems to be rather proud of it, as yesterday he was seen down OOC avenue making an X-ey face at the topic of 2k guns, as if that was nothing to him.

Tobias, your gun is surely impressive, but you seem to have become deluded and lost your place in the world. The men who were being spoken of were legends. Not only were they supreme hitters, but they were leaders, godfathers, orators, diplomats, men who could run a war, not just take an order and pull a trigger.

You are nothing but a tool, to be honed and used at Disorder or First's leisure. The only reason you've been allowed to live this long and reach whatever gun you have is because they know you are too stupid to realize exactly what you are, and to cowardly to try to be anything else. 

When you do die your name will not be remembered alongside the legends that were mentioned there, or hell, even with the prominent asshats of the current regime. You will fade into nothing and be remembered only as a tool. Perhaps a very useful and effective tool, but a tool nonetheless.

Tool.

The Less Salty Section
Too much sodium in your diet can be harmful.

Surprisingly, at least one of the prominent asshats running the show currently seems to have a bit of an eye for progress. The annoyingly named and similarly looking LarryLongNeck of Las Vegas has attempted to reinvent the way the business district works, setting up several establishments and encouraging groups to "knock them over." It is a supremely interesting idea and a definite step in the right direction, and it is reassuring to know that at least one of them has an interest in leaving our world better than it was when they inherited it, rather than in shambles and ashes. Unfortunately, he doesn't seem likely to turn around and shoot them all anytime soon, so we will have to continue dealing with the rest.

For further details, please see here.

DanGleeballs: COTY or Revolutionary?
Maybe both?

Recently DanGleeballs of Chicago was released from federal prison after serving a sentence for abusing/retaliation/generally being a cunt.

Although clearly guilty, he still maintains his innocence to this day and is eager to show everyone that he is still just as cunty as he was before he got pinched.

Upon reinstatement he was shockingly given authorization to set up in chicago under MonsterHair - scratch that, not so shocking, seeing as Chicago is a dump full of mostly silent and inactive leaders and few candidates worthy of leadership. Naturally cronyism sets in when this sort of city arises.

Within a few hours Mr. Balls made an appearance in the streets laying out his expectations and intentions going forward with his family. While his aims are indeed admirable, this reporter found it to be pretty ironic that one of the most infamously arrogant and self-centered people on the planet would be parading on about teamwork, the good of the family, and so on and so forth. 

He went on to insinuate that anyone who was made was "untouchable" which is just ludicrous to say, as no one is untouchable once they reach the purge line. As previously stated in this publication, rank and standing within a crew are nothing if you are perceived as a threat.

To date Dan has gained one member, and remains confident that his crew will eventually fill up and be full of great men and women. While this reporter doubts it very much, we nonetheless applaud Dan for his valiant effort to sidestep memberwhoreing and "pre-prune" his family. While it is definitely a step in the right direction, I doubt he is the man for the job.

Although he would certainly beg to differ.

MonsterHair Sighting in Shady Chi-town Alley!
Maybe Bigfoot really does exist as well?

An absentee leader to rival the likes of Borkers and JakeLuciano, MonsterHair was sighted late last night in a dark alley on the South Side of Chicago. It was the first time in days he had been witnessed on our shores. 

As expected, he made no public appearances or assisted in the management of his city in any way other than to use his gun. A witness saw him gun down a small boy in the back alley and then retreat back into the shadows. He appeared to have tried to mask his face, but his hair is very prominent and gave him away instantaneously. The witness fled the scene immediately.

Not long after that, his protege and fellow Chicago slumlord Orange made a similar appearance, coming into the open to shoot a teenager pretending to be a wizard for halloween. The boy was clearly autistic and was no more of a threat than prettywittyspikes, but was gunned down in cold blood for being around during a rogue display.

Much like his mentor, Orange is rarely seen in the open and essentially never in the streets, and retreated back into hiding after his display of power, but not before allowing his captainess (lover?) Princesa to be walked on by Las Vegas leadership.

Does Anyone Know Who is ACTUALLY Pulling the Strings?
Illuminati...

This is a very curious time. Normally when a "group" is on top, it's just one group. The CP, the salted ones, Czylharz (probably spelled it wrong, but they were generally garbage anyway). It was clear who was running the show.

But right now, we have two or three groups all running the show simultaneously, with seemingly the same mindset in hand. Kill all threats, live as long as possible, and drive our world into the ground.

Who is actually in control? Let's look at the possibilities.

• Disorder - The general assumption, although probably the least likely to be true. He is certainly the lightning rod for the criticism, and takes the brunt of the blame for this regime's tyranny. But to say that one man is all powerful or pulling all the strings is a bit naive. While he appears to be the conduit for communication between the groups, I don't believe they all answer to him and him alone. He is just the figurehead.
• Who-err - Are they even a thing anymore? Are there even any members playing? Someone tossed their name in there to my ancestor when speaking about it ages ago, but I've yet to see any evidence that they are currently relevant.
• Fuckerish - Mostly IA at this point, although that's not really anything new. Mostly in Chicago now with the removal of Lillith from Las Vegas due to forged telegrams (pissed meself when I heard about that.) They certainly have the guns to take control, if they wanted to. Thing is, none of the really seem to give two shits about it, as long as they're left alive. 
• Niflheim - The silent but deadly. Rarely seen on the streets, hardly known to the majority, these shadow warriors essentially only come around to shoot things. Not one of them is worthy of a crewleader position. (with the possible exception of First, as his ancestors were excellent in leadership.) But in our world, speaking softly and carrying a big stick can get you a lot of power. You just have to betray a lot of people and be as manipulative and shady as possible. It seems they have a formula, because this is the second time in recent years they have been at the big boy's table. Which is scary, because it means they could do it again after they inevitably fall. But they don't seem to want to be entirely responsible  for the game. They would prefer to have a lightning rod to take all the heat (I.E. Kimble, Disorder) while they add notches to their guns and count witness statements while preparing for their next purge. 
• LaFrat - Generally retired, although this would be the group Disorder falls into, so you can't say they're not still in power. But they haven't been pulling the strings in a long time, not since Disorder started turning on them all. 

I would lean towards niflheim being the big bad wolf in this situation, but it's not 100% clear. They could easily crush Fuckerish, but how would Disorder react? The same could be said of fuckerish, they have the guns to eliminate Niflheim, but would Disorder be on board? Sooner or later something has to give, much like the last time niflheim sat side by side with a group (albeit one without a name, whose members all now despise each other.), and niflheim came out on the short end of the stick then. 

I have record from a reliable source that Borkers' son told him: "We always knew it would be a matter of time until you went after Disorder, same as we know with niflheim." 

So the question of what happens when this all pops off has definitely been raised on that side, but they obviously don't have the thunder anymore. 

And if I know First, he has definitely discussed the possibility with his circle, and worked out an action plan and emergency signal for when the time inevitably comes. 

Should the gods intervene?
Loopholes are loopy.

Some folks have recently taken to crying out to the heavens for help with our current predicament. It is not unusual, several times in the past people have asked the gods to get involved in the affairs here. But the gods are just, and will not act without sound proof that their laws have been broken. People have hinted in other places that laws are indeed being broken, or at least circumvented by "loopholes" the regime has found in order to continue their bloodline hunting.

This reporter has always maintained the idea that the gods should only enact their wrath when the rules are clearly broken. If they were to jump in anytime some dickhead got a little power happy, they'd have to do it once a month. It will take an awful lot more than loopholes to get them involved, and honestly, is that really what we want to see anyway? 

I for one look forward to the day someone finally slips through the cracks and becomes the hero we all need. He will forever be a legend in my eyes, above even the manliest of my heroes. I would hate for that opportunity to be stolen because people complained to the gods without merit.

I could name a few people who could take the head off the snake right this moment, if only they weren't so comfortable in their cowardice.

Survey
Everybody loves a survey.

On the back of this issue you will find a short survey for some reader feedback. Please fill it out for us here at the TBG so we can figure how to better serve you in the future! 

We welcome all feedback, be it positive or negative!

Closing thoughts and other stuff
Fucking finally.

That draws this week's issue of The Bloodlined Gazette to a close, kiddos. Cue the badasses come out to harass me and call me names!

I hope that a few of you are better informed now of the devastatingly disastrous situation we are currently in. If you are someone who has the power to change things: for the love of god, DO IT. 

Don't be content with what you have, be the hero that this world needs! Like the great greek heroes of ancient times, you too will be remembered as a legend, a savior, a warrior. 
 

Oh, and get yourself a decent proer.

That is what she said, my good sir.

tips hat

This was a fine read and quite enlightening for me; I had no idea so many people were pulling my strings behind the scenes, thanks for the heads up!

Always knew DanGleeballs was COTY though.

An informative read, although a bit biased against the current regime as was the obvious intent.  That said, the author knows the current political situation without going so far as to name every person in each group.

My take on the whole thing?  The groups in power are doing what they should be doing because it is working for them regardless of any outside perspectives on their leadership qualities and demeanor.  Unfortunately, they have also drawn a line in the sand and those that are not on the right side of it will eventually be killed at a convenient time if they could ever possibly be a threat.  I'd do the same thing if in their shoes. 

Those on the wrong side of the line (and this is everyone else in the community that is not a member of the associations mentioned) should continue to do as they are by going rogue, trying to kill those at the top that are holding their bloodlines back even if it means going for low probability attempts.  Maybe even begin recruiting others within the community that are not involved for activities such as witness statement catching, bodyguard shooting and proers for big guns rogues that are running amok.  Newer members of the community might find it fun and numbers for a revolt mean everything.

On a side note, there's no need to make it personal.  For those in power everyone involved has their role and they seem to be filling their requirements quite nicely.

If you want to kill them, act on your desires to remove them by recruiting more to do the same that might be up to it....they'll be trying to do the same to you.  It's dirty pool on both sides since this the mafia and it's what we signed up for....wouldn't change it for the world.

Good luck.

First off that was a lovely read, and it's nice to see a well written paper grace our shores once more(It's been awhile). I should point out one small thing, it's minor but I do think it's relevant to yesterdays events, if only to things clearer.

Loveable and Nemisis did not shoot Lucky. Them along with my father were around during the time he died. At first they didn't think much of his death really. We had seen people gunned down in the past at ungodly hours in order to cover the killers identity. Once my father was shot down and I was informed why he had died, I quickly informed my fathers friends that they were in danger. They were set to die. They knew it was only a matter of time as they were also around when Lucky met his unfortunate end. So they acted rather than wait for that inevitable hot lead sandwich with there names on it.

Makes a mental note to get the publishing staff an entire case of OOC-itis medicine.

Great to see some effort being put into a newspaper of sorts

"I'll admit, Mr. Bloodlined. You write rather well, albeit very biased. Thank you for the interesting read. I found things out about me and those around me that even we didn't know! 

I must laugh about one thing though, 'Bloodlined'. Isn't it ironic how complaints of blood-lining seem to be the most heard thing on these streets recently, by yourself as well as others - and yet, you've clearly stated in your article people were shot because they were unknown. Which is it? Are we blood-liners? Or are we killing unknowns? If you will write an unnecessarily-long salty post-death 'article' in your Fathers honour, please at least make an effort not to contradict yourself and your 'cronies' (I take it you haven't heard of friends or colleagues, because everyone who says more than two words to one another seem to be cronies in your eyes?) pathetic cries, it's embarrassing."

Pollution goes back to continue enjoying the strong growth and prosperity of those actually loyal to his family - not before rushing to ask Disorder if he can do as such, of course!

He chuckles as he leaves sight.

An interesting read, and a welcome addition to the Streets.

I don't agree with much of what's been written but, as with everything, each person owns their own truth.

Any way you cut it, Disorder has written himself and this era that we are all living through into the history books.

Put simply, and without condoning or commending, this environment is a product of Disorder, and this piece of writing a treatise of that environment.

If only you'd put this much effort into being relevant. 

FearlessJ, maybe you could write a newspaper?  Possibly about the life and Proper Real Fist Fights That Totally Happened that you've witnessed?

Aint it funny how the regime can say or do whatever they want whether it be murdering innocents, purging entire families, lying through their teeth or any one of the other many horrible things they are accused of and the only defense provided is "they are doing what they need to to stay on top". Yet if anyone does anything to fight against them whether it be roguing or coming to the streets to expose them then all of a sudden these individuals are turned on like disease ridden devil worshipers.

Don't be disheartened with their nonsensical propaganda and don't give up the fight, whether it be rogues, newspaper articles, fake logs or anything else you can think of to disrupt and annoy. All it takes is time and pressure and eventually things will crack.

The_Big_K Thats actually a great idea :S, I will get on that.  My first paper will be delivered tonight?

Dan made his way out into the street after hearing he had won Crewleader Of The Year.

"Truly, this is a well received reward for me. I know I am fresh on the scene as a crew leader and I know I'm doing a sterling job thus far, but even I was well surprised to know that I was held in such high esteem so early on into my leadership. This surely highlights what I've been saying all along, that I'm fucking awesome. I'd also like to thank Larry for acknowledging my hard work too."

Dan took the trophy, it happened to bear a striking resemblance to a vagina but Dan assumed it was just some sort of new art that was all the rage right about now.

"A good reporter always keeps his facts up to date and correct untrue and unreliable. So to set you straight, I have three members now and I've set up under The_XX in North Side, you silly Sally.

It was a good read though, probably could do with more mentions of me in order to pull in a better crowd but well done anyway. I won't hold it against you too much.

I'd score it the same as my wife's looks - 6/10 (She's got a cracking set of chebs though).

Firstly, I'd like to thank all of you for your support. The outpouring of positive feedback truly is inspiring.

And on the flip side, those of you with negative feedback are just as helpful, perhaps even more so. Thank you all for coming out to support us!

Now, a couple of people's words caught my attention. 

Amazingly enough, the thought occurred to one of  my ancestors. He did put in that effort and I daresay he was much more relevant than you will be in this lifetime. However, the end result was all the same - he was shot when he became too big of a threat. Which is all fine and dandy really, I'd have done the same if I were on top.

However his death isn't the issue. It's the death of each one of my ancestors since then, who were either unable to live due to family history or assumed to be rogue because they did not reveal their identity.

And I look forward to your attempt at a paper. Anything that adds to the streets is a welcome sight to these eyes!

HenriDucard, please provide something more productive to the conversation or go crawl back into you emo-hole. 

Danno - I think you may have mistook what the C in COTY stands for, you big no name C.

Pollution, a couple things. Thanks for pointing out the difference between bloodlining and unknown killing, I will be sure to include a piece on the theoreticals of that conundrum in the next issue.

Also, this wasn't written in my father's honor. He wasn't important, and neither am I. This was written for the people who have no voice, who can't speak their mind, and want to be heard.

Good day sirs.

Weekly Douche-Light
Putting the spotlight on a new douche each week.

 

This week's douche was a toss up. I could have highlighted quite a few people here. My first instinct was to go with Pollution, as he is so clearly a giant douche. But I also thought Kharon deserved to be shown the spotlight, since he/she/it has so rarely seen light at all in it's lifetime. But I already hit Pollution up above and Kharon can wait for another time. JoeKing, Orange, and DanGleeballs all get an honorable mention, but I only have so much in the printing budget and can't afford to do everyone at once. That kind of thing is for people like Ryann.

This week's douche of the week is ♣Tobias.

Well I'll be fucking damned, this is a title I would love to have permanently, Tobias I think the only reason why you got it was because they wanted to try to make you feel bad by calling you a tool which is laughable considering you have done more than all these kids combined in a single life. But hey, hopefully next time yo' dumbass will be knocked off that title by me! *JoeKing smiles in a creepy way*

As for calling you a tool and whatever other garbage this says, and then mentioning other "important" people who are "leaders" while you are not a Godfather or something like that,  I don't understand how that's a bad thing, not once have I ever heard you say you wished to be a Godfather or a crew leader, if anything I'm pretty sure you told me you DIDN'T want to be either of those unless absolutely necessary, or are my drunken days making my memory fade, Tobias?

As for making fun of your accent, really people? We make fun of the way people speak now? If anything that shows how far he has come in this thing of ours even with all the barriers. Being an outsider sets limitations right from the beginning, but fuck's sake he tried his best and has made it this far. Meanwhile, what the  FUCK have you morons done other than writing salty and butthurt "Newspapers" Which are in reality just a way to come out here to cry (as usual) and keep crying instead of TAKING ACTION.

How. Fucking. Pathetic.

On a side note, props to DangleeBalls and LarryLongNeck for getting a shoutout and congratulatory awards even from the newspaper. Keep up the good work guys, seems it surely isn't going unnoticed. A special award for Danglee for being so badass that he managed to get all his bodyguards re-hired right after getting out of jail and start leading a crew. That takes some.... dangling balls... *ba dum tss* Ha ha ha ha ha, fine fine fuck y'all I know my jokes are horrible.
 

Also props to the newspaper writers that, even with pretty shitty information about who is "controlling" the mafia, they manage to name 2 famous groups and try to start shit between them, that's a pretty witty and sneaky ass way of doing shit. "Can't defeat them, try to turn them against each other"

Now, why am I out here talking shit so much all of a sudden? Because honestly all this shit is just annoying lately. Before this I was taking almost no action on most things, now I am basically forced to do so.  Anyone who knows my ancestors from loong long time ago know I can be the biggest pain in the ass for people, so I thank you all for awakening me. Keep this garbage coming guys, honestly it is quite enjoyable!