Tough mobster and perfect gentleman and stud that he was, Tommy also known as Tommy Boy was strutting the way only he knows how through the streets of Windy City, the City of Wind, Chicago. He was munching on a hot dog, which was common to munch on in the city of Chicago, but what was uncommon about it was that it had ketchup on it, which, being that it was frowned upon in Chicago, attracted the frowning stares of many a Chicagoan, but Tommy Boy did not care for he was his own man. Tommy Boy was a strapping young man, handsome, he wore his dad's old suit and gold watch like it was his own. His poor dad had been clipped by natural causes years ago and seeing as Tommy Boy did not want to spend his life as a baker's apprentice like his old papa was, he decided to become a man of honor and enter the life of the crime. Not only that, but Tommy Boy was also a pretty damn good chess player, and in fact, that day he had been going around asking people "1. e4" but, alas, no-one fucking wanted to play. Pity.

Now how would an illustrious young fellow such as Tommy Boy find himself a desirable job with the country's most undesirables? Tommy Boy did not know the answer. He had been working hard, though, did Tommy Boy, having stolen about seventeen purses from carefully-chosen old ladies that whole morning. That ought to put him on the map! What a brilliant thought by the tactically strategically adept Tommy Boy. He had already known many things about how This Ting of Hours™ worked, from the journals of his forefathers and foreforeforefathers. But don't dare ask Tommy Boy for their names, for if you do, may God strike you down where you stand (heh, heh, see what I did there)

Tommy Boy knew there were crews in Chicago with vacancies that could use his immaculate talents. So he decided to yell from the rooftops to see if anyone'd listen. He cleared his throat, as well as the ketchup stain on his pearly white shirt, and said:

"Heey Ooh, Bada bing bada boom bop, is there any crew here worthy enough of my presence? I'm not very funny but I cook great manigott', OH!"