You stop in your tracks as you hear the subtle sound of rustling in the bushes to your right. Adrenaline seeps into your veins as you pull open your coat and slowly reach for your gun, your heart nearly stops when you feel the empty holster. 

The rustling in the bushes stops. You look at your surroundings ready to crater someone's face in. At this point, the adrenaline is flowing through your viens. You feel a thud on your left shoulder, your eyes pop wide open as you go to elbow your opponent in the chin. You quickly turn around when you notice your elbow connects with nothing. You notice whatever it was that hit your shoulder is still on you. Screaming like a little girl, you try and swat whatever it is off of your back.

After stop, drop and rolling on the floor, you get up and start to collect yourself. In front of you stands a small gibbon--probably the size of a rat terrier--with your gun hanging from its tail and an envelope in its hand. The little ape throws the letter at your feet, drops the gun at her feet, then quickly jumps onto a light post and onto a roof. Before you know it, she's out of your sight.

You look around again, to see if anyone else seen what the hell you've just seen. No one else is around so you walk over to your gun, pick it up and put it back in its holster. Still trying to figure out what happened, you reach down to pick the envelope up. You open it and take the letter it contained out, unfold it and read;

Blue Heaven Crime Syndicate

^{Run by the DON of Philidelphia HotIce}

To whom it may concern:

Greetings, I am Jon. 

If you're reading this letter, it means you've been noticed by The Blue Heaven Family. We appreciate the errands you've been completing for us. It takes a lot off of our shoulders and we respect that.

Omertà, loyalty, hard work, and a strong stomach will get you far in the world of a mafioso, as well as The Blue Heaven Family. If you stay actively working to reach the top, one day you might see yourself there.

We currently have a couple of rooms left at headquarters, so if you're looking for a place to be safe, a place to call home, we could use a hardworking person like you in our family. Joining up with us will ensure your safety and a friendly group of people you can call your family.

Shoot a letter back at me if you want to join up with the DON of Philly and her family. The Blue Heaven Crime Syndicate.

Respectfully, 
 

simpleJon

The Old bum was wasted. She had been sampling the Philadelphian hooch to see if it was worth hauling back to Chicago and came to the decision that a night on the town was the best way to decide. "These guys have it good." after finding an alleyway to settle down for the night she begins to settle into her usual routine of begging. Before she could ask a local thug walking by, some gremlin creature jumps on his back. the poor gentleman freaks out and begins to attack the air where this gremlin was. it was at this point, The Old Bum came to the conclusion:

"Im taking a truck load of this hooch"