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Tony was sitting outside the Mystery Machine Headquarters next to a bum who had found refuge next to the alley. He wasn't sure what the bum's name was but he decided to name him Graaahhg as that was the noise he tended to make whenever he nodded off in the middle of their conversations. Unsure if Graaahhg was even fully alive at this point, but wanting somebody to talk to he began to speak...
"You know Graaahhg I still remember how I got myself into the life I lead now. It isn't a pleasant story. Hell it may not even be a good story, but it runs through my mind all the time. Sometimes I wonder how I'm even still here, although I know I owe it to Shaggs since he..."
Graaahhg made a loud groan and shifted himself to a more upright position to be more comfortable.
"Ah, I knew you'd be interested Graaahhg. So why don't I just jump right in and tell you the story of how I became a mafioso..."
Tony awoke one day to a loud bang outside his apartment door. The sun wasn't even up yet and when he checked his clock it had only been about an hour and change since he had fallen asleep. Then another loud bang came from outside his room so he decided he should at least check to see what was happening.
When he finally reached the door, he slowly peered through the peephole to find that whatever was making the noise was to the left or right of his door. So he cracked the door enough to squeeze his head out the door to look to the right and then finally to the left. To his left was a man sitting on the floor in dirty clothes with a frying pan in his hand.
"Hey, are you alright out here? I heard some banging."
The man turned and stared straight at Tony with a menacing look on his face. This stranger rose up from his spot and slowly raised the frying pan. Before Tony knew what happened the man swung the frying pan straight back at himself and he fell to the ground. Not really know what to do, he went over to check on the strange man. Peering down at the man Tony...
"Wait a minute, Graaahhg that was you in my apartment building. You....you really need some help don't you? Well anyway let's fast forward past that part since you were obviously there for it. "
Tony was back in his apartment finally after the doozy of morning he just had. Right before he was able to sit down there was a loud knocking on his door. Before he could make his way back over to the door the person who must have been knocking kicked it in. The surprise caused Tony to fall to the ground, but he quickly angled his body towards the doorway.
"Alright, get him up off the ground. We need your apartment on behalf of Tyler Durden. So you'll need to get out of here. Now!"
The three men who had just entered Tony's apartment were from the infamous Durden crew. But Tony was frozen and unsure of what to do. For some reason his fight or flight response was not leaning towards flight...
"What? Do you have empty space between those ears? I told you to get out of here!"
Tony looked at the three men. The one who had helped him up left his sawed off shotgun by the door, the silent one was holding a tommy gun at his side while still partially in the hallway, and the man who kept yelling at him had nothing but a knife at his side. Their body language began to change the longer Tony refused to leave and Tony knew that it was mere seconds before he would have to fight.
Just as the man closest to him began to move towards the doorway Tony punched the loudmouth in the face and grabbed his knife. Quickly turning it in his hand as he turned to the man going to the door he grabbed him around the neck and stabbed into his chest. The man with the tommy gun opened fire as Tony stayed behind the mobsters body. They fell to the ground together as the bullets ripped into the one mobster and one even tore through Tony's right shoulder. The one Tony had punched got up to his feet...
"Well what are you waiting for? Go check him out."
The mobster switched the tommy gun for the shotgun his friend had left by the door and slowly crept over to where Tony and his friend laid on the ground in a bloody mess. Right as he reached the bodies, Tony swung his foot out to kick the mobsters legs out from under him. When he landed the shotgun was pointing back at himself. Tony reached out with his left hand for the trigger...
"NOoo!"...BANG!
Blood flew everywhere. Finally the loud mouth who kicked in Tony's door began to run for the hallway. Tony pushed the one body off of himself and used his left arm to push himself upright. He knew the shotgun had one more shot in it so he picked it up and began to chase him.
You sons of bitches think you can get away with this!? You're not leaving this place alive! Tony screamed.
Tony followed after the man as he made his way to the stairwell, but as the loud mouth made it there he tripped and fell down a flight of stairs. Tony slowly made his way down to him and shoved the two barrels against the back of his skull.
"Please man, you don't have to do this. I won't tell nobody about it, okay? We're at war anyway so I can just tell Tyler that it was those guys from the Bronx who did it. Please man."
Tony felt an odd sensation overcome him as sweat slowly ran down the side of his face and all he could feel was that sweat and the coldness of the trigger. He knew he couldn't let this man leave, but those first two kills were in self defense. This one was just a straight up execution. If this man left though, more men would come looking for him to get payback. The world seemed to freeze for a moment.....BANG!....Tony squeezed the trigger and blew the man's brains all over the landing. Tony just sat down on the stairs after that. Staring at the wall, while covered in blood and sweat.
After a short while Tony heard footsteps running up the staircase below him. He knew this had to be more of them and he was out of ammo. He wasn't even sure if he wanted to fight since he just felt exhausted. So he sat there and waited for them...
Just as the men got to the spot where Tony sat they raised their guns and pointed them at Tony.
"Who the hell are you?" He yelled at Tony, but then turning his attention to the dead body. "Hey isn't that one of Durden's top guys? I mean I recognize his suit since he wore nothing else but I'm not sure." This time he was talking to the people behind him and one of them nodded.
"So I'm Shaggs, I run the Mystery Machine Crew here in the Bronx. Who are you and why do I feel like I'm going to be seeing your mug around a lot more?"
Tony stared somewhat blankly up at the man...."My name is Tony Castelli."
"So there you have it Graaahhg! That's how I finally became a mafioso. What a thriller am I right?.....Graaahhg? Graahhg!?!? "
Just then Graaahhg made his usual noise notifying Tony that he was asleep.
"Well at least it seems to be a good bed time story. Come knock on the HQ doors when you're hungry Graaahhg. I'll come out and take you to get something since Shaggs and Katy Perry don't want you in there. Something about cleanliness and hygiene or whatever. See you later bud."
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