Cosmo steps out of an alleyway, covered in a sticky substance.  On closer inspection, it’s bright orange and is dripping onto the pavement. 

Morning.   You might be wondering what on earth I’m covered in.  Well, it’s almost a full can of Irn-Bru.  I was walking through this alleyway when I tripped over what I thought was an old carpet but it turned out to be someone who’d blown their own brains out.  What a waste, the Irn-Bru and the person in the alleyway but mostly the Bru.

Anyway it got me thinking.  From looking in the obituaries it seems to me, possibly the most unhappy people in our cities and therefore the most likely to off themselves appear to be wise guys.  Now whether it’s because in some cities, the books are closed and they’re not making a move up or maybe it just seems to be too much hard work to go that extra step.  I don’t want to generalise too much.

However, I propose setting up  WiGS, Wise Guy Support.  This is completely unrelated to balding mafiosi who require support or otherwise for their laughable condition.

If you know a wise guy who is maybe down in the dumps, give him or her a hug.  Send them a joke, EvilClown has some corkers at his comedy clubs.

Let’s get their peckers up….as it were.