"Be kinder to yourself. And then let your kindness flood the world."
                                                    -Pema Chodron

Take some melatonin, it will help you sleep. Vela thought to herself, her head under the covers. "Ugh." She groaned, buried herself in her pillow, feeling a little wetness from her eyelids as she shut them, trying her best to not get overwhelmed with the recent events. The pain in her heart started to subside a little bit when she calmed herself down with a cup of coffee, a guarantee that now she'd get absolutely no sleep for the night. There were many things to say, but no words would come out of her mouth. Vela had ignored her younger sister, Aquila, for the night, which was foreign behaviour since she would always go to her when she wasn't feeling particularly good. This time was different though. Vela needed time and space to mend the shattered pieces of her heart, the outcome of her dear Alpha, Ely, retiring. Vela pulled her blankets over her face more, not wanting Aquila to see her tear-stained face, now voicing her thoughts to herself as she tried to come to terms with the whole situation. But really, what was there to come to terms with? Does she just have to accept the difficult situation and withstand all the feelings of despair that comes along with it? She squeezed her eyes shut, trickles of fluid drooping down her soft, pale cheek. Vela pursed her lips, thinking about what she would have to do tomorrow. Furthermore, who she would have to see tomorrow. Losing her Alpha, Ely, along with the bond she had created with the other family members, was indeed a great loss. But Vela knew better than to mope around and let her emotions get the best of her, which could cause her to relapse again.  

A few hours had gone by already, with Vela trying to coo herself to sleep, which was no luck due to the caffeine she had allowed herself. Thinking it would work, but only enabled her to stay more awake. It was already morning, even. The sun peeked through the curtains of Vela and Aquila's bedroom, one would find it weird that they still sleep in the same bed, but it was a sister thing. Vela squinted her eyes, trying to see past the morning daylight, almost blinding herself as she sat up. "Wake up, girlie..." Vela ruffled her hand in Aquila's hair,  trying to get her out of her deep sleep. She wasn't sure how Aquila coped last night, but Vela would make sure to talk to her in the morning, so they could figure out what their next move would be. She stretched her arms up high, feeling some muscles in her back crack. "Mmm." Vela almost moaned from the satisfaction that it brought. Her body loosened as her tiny figure rose from the white mattress, stepping over the blanket. Still, it was there. The pain. She was worried that it would always be there, or maybe it will be kept in the back of her mind forever. Ely was gone, but never forgotten. As she headed to the walk-in bathroom, for the first time in a few hours, she felt a smile creep on her face. When Vela reached the sink, she looked back at her reflection in the mirror, feeling adrenaline seep through her veins, her inner wolf calling out to her. "Oh, get ready." She grinned to herself, taking a comb and running it gently through her hair.

During the little but precious time she worked for her Alpha, Vela had grown to appreciate the smaller things in life. A simple acknowledgement of her presence by him greeting her in the morning was always one of the highlights of her days, or even seeing him in a jolly mood would cheer her up. However, Vela couldn't deny the times when she saw her Alpha in distress, which broke her heart. There was a correct time to ask what was wrong, but for the most part, she figured it would be best to keep to herself for a while- he had other priorities on the side, and one of them wasn't spilling out his problems to each of his crew members, probably causing a great deal of discomfort. Vela regretted it though. She wished she had let Ely talk more about what was his bothering him, she wished she had approached him when the air in the headquarters had turned eerie, she wished she had, she wished she.. she wished. 

"Fuck it." She quickly wiped the tears that formed under her eyes away, setting her mouth shut in a tight line. Vela sniffed hard, trying to recollect her thoughts. It was clear to see that wasn't that far from going back into a numb state of mind, so it was time to pick herself back up and rise from the events that had weighed her down. Shortly after taking a shower and getting dressed in the bathroom, Vela noticed that Aquila was still sound asleep in the bed, her precious starlet looking ever so cute under the comfortable, white bed sheets. The bed dipped as Vela leaned over her, placing a gentle kiss on her younger sisters forehead. "I'll be back, Aqua." She whispered delicately, before getting off the bed and walking out the room. Vela took a deep breath, taking one last look at herself in the mirror by the entrance, smoothing down her clothes. Nothing too fancy, just a white, decorative blouse and plain black jeans. She contemplated on pairing her outfit with a black blazer, but it wasn't really her style. "This is for you, Ely." She sighed to herself, giving a look-over of the house, before walking out into the fresh air of Pasadena, Los Angeles. 

What do I do? 

What was next? 

Who do I look for? 

Why am I doing this? 

As her feet stood on the porch, she looked out into the vast distance ahead of her. Her mind wandered off to the first week she had stayed in LA, meeting Jonny at the diner, finding Ely in the foothills of San Gabriel, and she looked down at the ground to prevent any more tears spilling down her face. 

Finding another family would be hard, but she remembered the things she had learnt during her time in Skinwalkers. Persistence, courage and determination. Vela remembered telling herself those things, these sacred traits that would be integral for Vela and Aquila's survival in the long term. Little did she know, she would be put in this kind of situation, having to look for shelter after the one man besides her father, whom she could trust her whole life, retired from this thing of ours. But now, she had to challenge her assumptions and face her fears. The training she had gone through under Ely would now be applied to her quest of finding another individual to lay her loyalty to. 

Though her loyalty was deeply rooted in her Alpha, Vela knew that he would want her to keep on keeping on, and not dawdle in the past, which also meant that Vela now had to seek another person she could dedicate her efforts to. It was almost like passing a baton, the baton being her loyalties and passions, now being shared to whomever she would choose. Vela walked over to her car, opening the door on the drivers side to get in, before pushing the key into the ignition. She didn't know how long it would take for her to find a home, but hopefully it would be real soon, as she had heard stories before of stray mafia members being taken captive by rival families, the remaining bones left on the shores, back to where they came from.  Vela reversed out of the driveway, before turning the steering wheel, into the great abyss. She passed by the high mountains on her right as she travelled in her car, another constant reminder of Skinwalkers, the grand heights that looked out into the magnificent lakes of L.A, which would always be eternal home. 

Vela caught a look of her face in the rearview mirror, grimacing a little at her appearance, which was a frail, teary-eyed and weary one. She started to think about who would even take her in? Vela didn't really know where to start, as Los Angeles was so populated and therefore a lot more competition. Although, she was considering exploring other cities, where she heard there was more opportunities for employment there. Vela didn't like so much competition, but she needed to push herself past the limit. After driving around endlessly, between bricks and curves, she stopped at a recruitment office- which brought her no luck. Besides, she had been residing in Los Angeles for so long now, she figured it was the right time now to extend her capabilities to other districts, which actually turned out better than she had expected. She had received a promising telegram from a woman, someone that Vela had once met before during her first few experiences of... breaking in and entering a pawn shop for small, but valuable objects. It had come as a surprise since Vela thought they would part their ways after that, never to be in contact with each other again, but now Vela had appreciated the goodness of the lady's heart. 

The move had been tiring, but successful. Slowly, but surely, Vela now had a place to call her new home. 

A new home. 

That sounded so tragic, but really, it was all for the best. Vela would keep Ely in her thoughts always, but would also try not to hang onto the disheartening events that inflicted the family. From hereon, she would try her absolute hardest to prove herself to her new crew leader, Don Dub, as well as try to create a strong bond with the other family members. It sounded easy, but she knew that for the first few days of being an associate, she'd need time to get comfortable and acquainted with everyone. The headquarters were based in South Side, Chicago. Chi-town, as Vela liked to call it. She would have to learn how to get accustomed to the cultures and values of the people here, but now, it would be easier to get help. She was beyond grateful that someone had sought her out for recruitment. She wondered what made Chicago different from other cities, one of the things she hoped to find out soon. This being her first trip to Chicago, Vela's first impression was that the city had brought a sense of friendliness and security, as well as the people here, who always seemed to have a hungry appetite for success. 

Vela smiled to herself. That was one of the things that stood out the most to her. If not everyone, mostly everyone had their eye on something, which only motivated her more. She was ecstatic to tell Aquila, still in Pasadena, about the homelike feel of Chicago as the moment she stepped into the vicinity, she felt her shoulders relax and her face begin to gain back some colour. Though it was at this moment, the nerves that were building up at the start, started to settle. Her eyes landed on the doors of the family headquarters, with complete determination. "You can do this." She cheered herself on. As she treaded carefully towards the entrance, she made eye contact with a familiar presence. "Jacquotte." Vela acknowledged, nodding, a gentle smile plastered on her face. From the moment she stepped inside the interior of the headquarters, Vela couldn't stop grinning from ear to ear, hearing people 's welcoming words. "Thank you." Vela replied in a relaxed manner, heart on her sleeve, with a mind of willpower. She felt small in such a a large space of people she didn't recognize, but she was thankful for the one time she had encountered Jacquotte on that spontaneous mission, as she at least had one person she could start to get more comfortable with. There was no saying what would happen from here, but Vela was certain that everything had a reason attached to it. Though she was still perplexed about the whole situation back home, the undeniable suspiciousness that accompanied it, which troubled Vela's soul. Right now isn't the right time to be gnawing at the thought, she thought to herself, shaking her head in disbelief. 

Not even a simple 'thank you' could justify the genuine contentment that rushed over Vela as she looked over to Jacquotte, her benevolent disposition made Vela feel like she was worth something, like she could freely speak without judgement, like she was... well, a valuable addition to the family perhaps? The corners of Vela's mouth lifted as she shook her head. She'll just have to see.

Here's to new beginnings. 

"How are you settling in Detroit?" 

The voice belonged to an old friend. Vela hadn't seen them for ages but she was glad that she had taken the chance to meet up with them at an ancient library downtown. Vela sat down by one of the round tables, head buried in a book called 'Gone With the Wind'. She had been eyeing it for weeks now as she was starting to get interested in historical fiction, which was unusual because on another day she would have probably picked a raunchy, romance novel. It also appeared that she almost forgot that someone was sitting across from her because she was too stuck on a very touching scene in the book where Rhett came to see Scarlett at the store. Vela suddenly realised, and she tilted her head up before she surveyed her surroundings absentmindedly like she had forgotten where she was for a second. She turned to her friend who had an amusing smile on their face, a smile that probably deemed her a fool. "Just fine, thank you. It's been two weeks and a half so far, I'm liking it." She paused, trying to think about how she settled down so easily after being pained by her former boss' retirement. "Well, it was kinda easy for me to settle down because I already had a really close friend living here, so I felt a little less lonely I guess." Vela smiled gently and shrugged. There comes a time when you just have to trust your instincts, and she did. Transferring from Chicago to Detroit wasn't that smooth as a move because she was already starting to get comfortable with The Seraphim Empire, but fortunately in the end she was swayed by her current crew leader's words. 

Vela started to feel the tiredness kick in so she wrapped up the conversation with her childhood friend, rose from her seat and thanked them as she trotted out the library. They would see each other again soon, but with the current state of the criminal world, she needed more time to prepare. Preparation for another war, another event of blood shedding for the throne, another day of doing what was expected of her. As her feet made its way outside the library's doors, she was invited by the cool breeze that smacked her in the face. It made her tug the zipper sides of her coat closer to her before squinting in the distance. Vela's roadster was parked in a far area because she thought that parking under a shady spot would shield her from the rain that was reported to come soon. Little did she know that 'soon' would be in a few seconds. Slowly but surely, a raindrop landed on her pale forehead, which made her look up. This was not a good idea, as more raindrops started to fall from the sky and her eyes were going to be flooded. It was a stinging feeling when the drops of rain landed over her eyes. Vela quickly returned her eyes to mid-level and quickened the pace of her footsteps. In a prompt manner, she then found herself standing in front of the drivers side of her vehicle. Once she was inside her car, she smoothed down her burgundy locks and caught a glimpse of herself in the rearview mirror, making herself slightly cringe. Driving home alone can be a drag for her but weirdly enough, the inanimate presence of her novel sitting in the passenger seat, kept her company. When she reached the driveway of her newly brought apartment, Vela couldn't help but wonder if one day, she would be like Scarlett. A carefree lady who reaches her breaking point when she loses everything, but starts evolving into the successful woman she was destined to be.

For the past two weeks, Vela had developed a certain routine. She didn't mind it because this kind of busy and chaotic lifestyle distracted her from the harsh realities of the world. This wasn't particularly a good thing though as she would have to face her fears soon enough. Vela had her Alpha Ely to thank for helping her sort out her priorities. Right now her first priority was to keep up communication with her family. She wanted to learn from her mistakes from the past, one of those mistakes was related to her not contributing enough to the crew meetings. Vela's newfound position in The Ivory Tower was a sign of the times changing, and she wanted to embrace those changes. "Hey home, I'm honey!" She shouted as she kicked off her tattered sneakers near the door. There was no response. "Aquila?" She shouted again, but there was still no voice replying back to her. Vela figured maybe she fell asleep really early tonight, which was always a good thing. They both needed to muster up the strength for tomorrow's duties at the family headquarters. Today was a more-laid back day than most. It was probably because of that novel she picked, which she would read again tonight and probably fall asleep to. Vela slipped her backpack straps off her shoulders carefully before plopping it on one of the dining room chairs. She took the intriguing novel she had found from before and kicked her feet up on the couch, flicking open the book to the page she bookmarked. Vela's eyes travelled over the words, being captivated every time.

It wasn't long before her eyelids started to shut and she dozed off. 

Could you blame Vela for falling asleep on that book though? She hadn't had much sleep prior that night due to late nights overthinking and doubting. Self-deprecating thoughts seemed to be the master mind for her failures, but she realised that it won't do her any good. It was early in the morning now and she had just finished showering, getting ready and fixing herself a soothing cup of coffee. Vela couldn't forget her extra sugar and milk either, as she couldn't have coffee without it. The bitter taste of it would put her in a bad mood for the rest of the morning, and she didn't want to get to the headquarters feeling like crap all over again. A little sweetener in her coffee can't harm anybody. "Aquila dear, get your butt up! Anyways, I'm heading off the headquarters early today. To make up for the lost time in bed for the past few days. I'm starting to think Izzy has got eyes on me." Vela smiled cheekily, towering over Aquila before placing a heartfelt kiss on her bare forehead. She exited the bedroom, waving as she did, and chucking on her usual sneakers on the way to work. They looked old and tattered now, but to be fair it was a pair that she had brought when she was low on her budget. Now that she had a little more going for her, she already had an attachment to those shoes so she never bothered to get another pair. Eventually she'd have to venture out into the market for affordable yet attractive looking shoes. On other days she'd only bring her sneakers and that would be it, but today required her to put on her more professional-looking shoes. Heels. 

She grimaced at the thought. Vela's heels made a clacking sound as she made her way inside the headquarters. It was always quiet in the mornings because her fellow associates would still be getting ready at this time. Vela remembered she had decided to go super early so it was no surprise. Now she'd wait for the people to mock her about the heels. She had a tomboy-ish style to her, but at the same time she had an extremely girly personality. In the mornings she'd usually be greeted by Tenkai first, whom she considered a close friend since the establishment of their friendship in Los Angeles, and he'd ruffle her hair. Her response would be, "Hey! I did my hair good today!" But Vela only meant it to be a joke as she enjoyed his company nonetheless. Vela's awareness of the other members of Ivory Tower was starting to grow as she was starting to get comfortable with them. In comparison to her first day, she was now less timid about how she would need to compose herself in front of everyone. After all, the last thing she wanted was to give out a fake identity to those she genuinely cared for. Right now it was family over everything. Suddenly, Vela felt a hand reach out from behind her, giving her a head pat. That could be only one person. "Tenkai you're lucky I adore you so much otherwise I'd have you in a headlock right now." She jested, pouting as she raised an arm to quickly smoothen down the loose strands of hair that came up. She couldn't help but crack a smile seconds after though.

"How have you been Tenkai? Can you come with me to the shooting range later? I don't know what Aquila's plans are for today but I know she won't be able to come due to some other stuff she has to sort out. I also just need help with my shooting abilities." Vela hoped he would agree to come with her as she hadn't been there in a while now. It would be also a good opportunity to catch up on what she's been missing. She wondered if he was trying to settle down with somebody or if he was staying away from the idea of having a love life right now, which Vela could understand because they both had just moved into a new family, and both needed more time to get to used the changes. Vela always liked having Tenkai around her. His charm and wits could never go unnoticeable, and she was very grateful for his existence. It all started in Pasadena when they were both recruited into Skinwalkers. From there, their friendship bloomed, and Vela even got to create a blueprint with him of a tiki hangout. A brilliant plan although it was never executed. Vela gave her morning greeting to Tenkai, smirking at his usual jokes then walking over to the powder room. "Oh, hey Jewel. You look absolutely gorgeous today. Nothing new.." Vela expressed, giving a playful wink before looking for an empty cubicle. "Here we go." She said to herself, entering the unoccupied toilet booth and closing the door behind her. "Jewel, don't mind me here. I forgot to pee at h-" Vela released an incredibly loud stream of pee, making her blush hard. "Err. Yup." A shy giggle escaped her lips, and the vibe of the room quickly changed from awkward to cheery. "Way to start the morning, eh?" Vela chirped, finishing up the last seconds of her pee break and reaching for the toilet paper roll on the side. When she was finally done in the toilet, she came outside of the ladies' restroom. Much to her surprise, she was suddenly met by a man holding a bible, a very valuable item that she hadn't seen in a while. "Care to share a verse?"

Vela's eyebrows wiggled, and she proceeded to walk with the man beside her.