Knock knock knock

At least this time, when Madeline showed up unexpectedly at his door, it would be day time. The sun was shining, the weather was one of those crisp, perfect sort of days, not too hot, not too cold. She would be dressed casually with her long blonde hair in a high ponytail. Her skin was still dull, and makeup continued to cover the dark circles under her eyes, but, and perhaps most importantly, she would be sober. For now, at least.

Madeline wasn’t sure what kept drawing her back here, to this man. She barely knew him. She helped him pick out a gun in a store in Detroit a long time ago. She had watched him perform on Broadway when she had gone to support him as a member of their city. And then he’d found her that day when she was an absolute mess and instead of taking advantage of the state she was in, he had made sure she made it home safely. And when she’d shown up here in the middle of the night dressed in a little black dress, he had shown a restraint most men couldn’t. She had seen a different side of him then, and she felt drawn to it. 

Was that what kept bringing her back? Madeline wasn’t used to this kind of situation, she didn’t normally chase men. But after her dinner with Tara, learning about Gavin being hurt and not having any way to reach him or see him, she needed a distraction. Part of her wanted to go find a bar and take her normal route out, but yet her feet had brought her here instead, to him. Besides, she still wanted to see more of that tattoo. That thought made her smile as she lifted her hand to the door a second time. 

Knock knock knock

A lifetime of moving around had encouraged him to learn to travel light. As such he preferred to have relatively few personal belongings. Anything that held him down or roped him back he would cut out. But his evergrowing infamy and the newfound materialism it brought along had come into contradiction with his minimalist travel plans. After some deliberation, he had reached a compromise and settled on a few wooden crates to be shipped and a duffel bag to be carried in his Studebaker roadster on the road South.

Having spent some time fixing squeaky cupboards and uneven stools in bars for a considerable part of his life, Alexander knew his way around a basic set of tools. A couple of trips to the hardware store and a few hours of tinkering early morning was all it took for him to craft the desired crates and pack them with his possessions. Having made the call to the shipping company midway he was already expecting them to arrive by the time he was done, but to his surprise, they didn't. Eventually, he could do nothing but sit around and wait.

When he heard the knock he pushed the pencil he had been rolling between his fingers, behind his ear and stood up off the crate he had been sitting on as he exclaimed "About bloody time!" His tool belt bounced off the wooden surface and came to a rest loosely hanging off his jeans-clad shorts. Grabbing a towel tossed nearby, he wiped some of the sweat glistening off the toned muscles of his arms and neck visible through his vest. The right arm, encased in intricate black carvings of methodically designed ink patterns, tucked the hammer back into his belt. 

Tossing the towel aside, he walked up to the door. Opening it carelessly he began to curse "Where the fuck have you-"  He paused as he saw a beautiful young woman instead of the burly balding male contractor he had been expecting, before finishing the sentence awkwardly "been?" It took him a moment to realize who it was that stood in front of him. Sobriety and a sadness had made her a new person, one he wasn't sure he fully recognized. 

He paused to gaze into her eyes knowing this would be an awkward conversation and not just for his own reasons. Yet, a part of him, fearful of never running into this beautiful mess of a person, was delighted by her sudden appearance even if the circumstances were less than ideal. "If I didn't know better," he said in amusement as he leaned against the doorframe casually not wanting to push her away but afraid of how she might react if she saw what lay within. "I'd say you're just making these abrupt appearances to catch me without a shirt." He continued with a playful smile.

Madeline raised an eyebrow as he opened the door with an angry tone, only to be caught off guard by her appearance. For a moment she thought he didn't recognize her, although she couldn't possibly look that different than she did just a few nights ago. It was clear he was expecting someone, but Madeline wasn't overly concerned by that. Instead, an amused expression graced her face and she let her eyes run over his appearance. That damn tattoo continued to intrigue her and she followed its pattern up his muscled arm to his chest. He was indeed shirtless and dressed as if he'd been building or doing some sort of construction. She looked back up, meeting his eyes with a chuckle. 

"Not my fault you don't ask who it is before you open the door. That's a dangerous habit you know." Her green eyes sparkled as one closed in a wink. She held up a big brown paper bag with a grin. "Dress comfortably and bring food. You invited me back remember? Granted, we never said when, but I figured everyone loves a good surprise."

She watched him to see his reaction, a part of her wondering if she'd misunderstood. But Madeline was nothing if not confident, at least when it came to men. 

"So are you going to invite me in or did I buy all this food for no reason?" 

As he noticed her eyes travel across his chest he couldn't help but smirk. Pointing to the paper bag in her arms he raised an eyebrow in curiosity and remarked "Beware of Greeks bearing gifts." He considered his options carefully, knowing she would not be pleased by his unannounced departure now that they had bonded somewhat. He knew this moment would come, but he had hoped he would not have to have a face to face confrontation with a woman in an emotionally fragile state of mind and one who had a fondness for firearms. A letter or a phone call would have been ideal.

Could he take her somewhere else? A bar? A cafe? The treehouse- his rooftop hideaway from the concrete jungle downtown? One look at the way she was glancing at the room behind while subtly fidgeting in impatience, waiting to be let in, told him it was no use. A low growl in the pit of his stomach finally convinced him. With a reluctant sigh, he grabbed the bag of food and walked back in. Sniffing the aroma of the tightly packed food within he motioned for her to follow and joked "If I knew you had such good taste in food, I'd have given you a key."

Once they rounded the corner and entered the living room he could hear her footsteps stop. Had she seen the sheets covering the furniture or the wooden crates with his name on them and belongings within?  "Of course, it's pointless now."  He said as he walked on to the kitchen, still not ready to face her. Opening an empty cupboard he recalled that most of the utensils had been returned earlier that morning. Grabbing a pair of spoons he placed them in the paper bag before unbuckling his tool belt and tossing it aside.

Picking up the paper bag, Alexander took a long, deep breath to calm himself. Then he pulled out the spoons and walked back into the room clutching bag in his hand, smiling sheepishly. Holding up the two spoons he said "I hope you don't mind eating like this wonderfully expensive food like homeless people because this is all I have left."

"I think it's a little soon to be exchanging keys." Madeline teased, her voice light as she finally followed him into the apartment. The reason for his hesitation became clear when he finally let her inside. Things looked different from the other night and once they entered the living room it was evident that everything had been packed up. Sheets were covering the furniture and there were crates lining the wall. 

He continued on to the kitchen but she stopped, her eyes scanning the room and taking it all in; he was leaving? She frowned slightly, wondering what was happening. A new apartment maybe? But why would he pack crates if he was just moving across the city? She forced herself to take a deep breath, not jumping into assuming the worse. 

He returned holding up two spoons, almost like a peace offering. The expression on his face caused her to smile. "That wonderfully expensive food came from a charming little Italian place supported by Southern Charm. It's delicious and if we have to eat it with our fingers then we'll just have to do that." 

A slightly more serious and curious expression come over her face as she motioned around the room. "Moving?" It seemed an obvious answer, but she still wanted clarification. He didn't really owe her anything, but to think he'd leave without even a word was....disappointing. Suddenly, she was sorry that she hadn't brought a bottle of wine. 

Alexander placed a newspaper on one of the taller crates and kept the food on top of it. Placing his elbows on the surface he slouched forward and picked up one of the spoons, sliding one towards her. She smiled as she told him about the latest Southern Charm business and the enterprise in general. He could feel how enthusiastic she was and how ambitious she was about her endeavour. "It's a pity I won't be able to thank the chef personally anytime soon. This is the best Italian food, I've had in a while."  He said as he licked his fingers clean once they had finished off the food.

An awkward silence descended upon them and he could sense the mood shift. Her expression turned serious as she asked the question he had been dreading. Unsure of what else to say he nodded. and tapped his knuckles on the surface as he stood up straight. Turning to face the skyscrapers glistening with a sun-kissed metallic sheen, visible from the floor to ceiling windows to his side, he paused as if to take a mental image of the city he would be abandoning. 

Tugging around in his pocket, he pulled out his pack of Camels. With a flick of his thumb, he opened it and brought it close to his face. "Broadway, though essential for building a quick reputation," he began, before pausing to pull a cigarette out of the pack with his lips. Closing the pack, he tossed it on a nearby crate, clasped his cigarette between two fingers and pulled it away as he turned to face her yet again. "Was never the kind of music I wanted to make." He explained calmly, before placing the cigarette back in his mouth and lighting it. 

Taking a long drag to let the edge smoulder evenly, he recalled the songs he had sung back in LA so long ago. He yearned to return to them once again, to write his own lyrics and to wrap them in his own melodies. Leaning back next to her, he let his elbow brush her arm as he blew the smoke in the opposite direction, away from here. "Someone has offered me an opportunity to change that, but to facilitate it, yes I have to move." Flicking the ash of his cigarette subconsciously he turned towards her and wondered just why he had been unwilling to tell her face to face. Was it because he feared, he would not be able to cut ties and make a clean break? Yes, yes that was it for as he gazed into her eyes he knew, he could never walk away from the intrigue held within them. 

"Philadelphia, I'm making an album in Philadelphia."  He whispered and his gaze fell to her lips. Ignoring the hunger within him, he waited for the response they would elicit.

Madeline sat perfectly still as he explained how he was given an opportunity to make music, the kind of music he had always wanted to make but that to do it he had to go to Philadelphia. She could see him looking at her, waiting for her response, but she wasn’t sure what to say. She had no right to ask him not to go. She had no right to expect anything from him, she hardly knew him.

But she was disappointed. As if a light had gone out inside of her, her shoulders dropped, and her eyes dimmed. He had whispered his destination like it was hard for him to say. Why? She looked back at him as if searching his eyes for an answer to that question.

“You were just going to leave?” Her own voice was soft in return. She didn’t know why she was so upset by that - maybe she had felt a connection that she hadn’t admitted to herself. Something kept drawing her back here after all. But to think he could just pack up and disappear without a word, well…maybe she had just been fooling herself. That seemed to be nothing new for her when it came to men, so she should hardly be surprised. 

Looking down at her fingers, she nodded slightly. “You have a beautiful voice. I’m sure you’ll do very well.” What else was there to say? She needed a drink.

He saw the disappointment in her eyes and the slouch in her shoulders and was a little taken aback. He had known it might affect her, but he did not expect her to make an obvious show of discomfort. Perhaps whatever else had been going on in her life had exhausted her too much to maintain a poker face. 

"Yes, yes I was. After all, there was no one here who would have missed me." He replied but even as the words left his mouth he knew that was a lie. This woman, this beautifully broken woman that had intrigued him so much since he had laid eyes on her, would have missed him. For a moment he wondered if she would have tried to stop him if he had told her earlier. He wondered if things could have turned out differently for them. He wondered if they could ever have started a romantic entanglement.

It seemed unlikely. He was far too world-weary and his philandering ways would have been troublesome. She seemed too preoccupied in her own troubles and her drug abuse would have been no easy vice to cope with. But somehow a part of him still lamented the lost opportunity to know for sure. Was it really too late?

He looked at her crestfallen expression and shook his head. "No, no, no. You don't just get to say that here. I need you at the album release party saying that to everyone present."  He half-joked as he stubbed out the cigarette. Taking in a step closer than appropriate he leaned in close to her ear. Smiling as he breathed in her intoxicating scent before whispering "I'll make you one of those Iced teas you love if you show up."

There once was a time when Madeline didn’t let such emotions get to her. But the past few weeks had truly broken Madeline and it was going to take time for her to rebuild herself. She was trying, really and truly. But every time she took a step forward it was like something was happening to push her backward. She needed to figure things out and it wasn’t fair to him for her to sit here disappointed when they’d barely really spent time together.

She smiled softly at his comment, although it didn’t reach her eyes. He was so close to her she was afraid to meet his eyes, worried she wouldn’t be able to control herself. She wondered if she had met him sooner if things would be different. She closed her eyes, sighing softly, resisting the urge to take advantage of how close he was.

“I have an apartment. In Philly. I….own a business there and I used to spend a good deal of time there.” That was before when she wanted to be in Philly more, in hopes of seeing Gavin. She wasn’t even sure why she was saying this at the moment, except his statements about her being at his release party. He said no one would miss him but it wasn’t true; she would miss him. "I'm sure I can make the trip. But only if you bring ice tea." 

"It's settled then." He said masking the quick response in what he hoped was enthusiasm before the hesitation in her voice overtook her being and she changed her mind. Alexander wasn't sure what he was doing, but he knew now that this would only ever have disastrous consequences. 

Her intoxicating scent rushing into his lungs, her soft skin brushing up against his arm, her sultry voice ringing in his ears, her eyes full of intrigue holding his own prisoner, it was too much. The proximity was too much for him to handle. Too long had he been resisting, stopping himself from doing what he craved. No longer could his reckless desire be imprisoned by logic. He wanted her, he needed her and he needed her at that very moment. 

His hand came up to her face with a mind of its own. Brushing a stray strand of hair delicately behind her ear, a finger traced a lazy trajectory along the length of her cheek before hooking beneath her chin and tilting it upwards. 

He knew the moment was at hand but as he was about to lean in for the kiss he saw a balding, fat bellied, middleaged man walk in through the open door with a clipboard. The contractors had arrived to move his stuff. Letting his hand slip away as he stood to converse with the guy he could do nothing but sigh.

There was an odd sense of relief at his statement, as if Madeline was pleased that he wanted her to visit with him in Philly. But a part of her was holding back; she didn’t want to go down this road again, not this soon. In fact, maybe it was best that he was leaving, putting some distance between them while she focused on just what the fuck was happening in her life. It wouldn’t be fair to this man if she were here for the wrong reasons.

All of those thoughts left her when he finally moved in to kiss her. She closed her eyes, her heart beating faster as she leaned forward to meet him – just to feel him pull away. Her eyes popped open and she turned to see the fat old man walking through the front door. She shot him a scowl, clearly unhappy with the sudden intrusion. Alex’s attention shifted, and she knew the moment was gone.

Cleaning up the remnants of the food, Madeline put it all in the bag and waiting a few moments for Alex to be finished conversing. She smiled softly at the man as she watched him speak with the person he'd actually been waiting for when she'd first arrived. Although she was still sad to see him leaving, there was a reassurance that Philly wasn’t very far away and he seemed to want to still see her. Unless she was misreading him, which she seemed to be a pro at these days. 

When he was able to turn his attention back to her, she leaned up and planted a gentle kiss on his cheek. “Travel safely Mr. Knight. Don’t forget about us here when you make it big, ok?”

And with that, Madeline left, wondering just what was next for her. There was still the urge to lose all of these emotions in the drugs and alcohol that had been so prevalent in her life. But there was also a little part of her that wondered if it were possible that something bigger and better might be waiting for her just around the corner.