walks out onto the streets again

I need a gf please I'll do anything I'll sleep on ur couch and we never have to touch I just need a cute girl to tell my friends im dating please.

send me one million dollars and write a poem saying why I should choose you. also you have to be taller than five foot two this isn't a charity. just please date me im desperate.

waits

Don't worry brotha man. I have the perfect mate for you! She is standing five foot eight inches with impeccable posture, beautiful black hair with zesty white highlights.

Only stipulations are as follow: In order to request my match making services you must send me one million dollars with a haiku explaining your personality; must be cool with dating a physical cow.

Don't listen to Jadus, I'll take care of you brother.  I have the perfect date for you.  Nothing better than a GF that listens to your stories and never interrupts.  Has eyes only for you.  And lastly, requires nothing from you other than a few minutes of your time each day.

Send ME $1M and I'll set up with this dream girl.  Simply blow her up and place her where ever your want.

Savannah stood in the darkness and laughs at the men. Shaking her head and leaves