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Richard grabs the mic
"I have been approached by numerous Mafioso's as of late, all in regards to the same thing. Assisting them with a speech. After a few requests I have decided to take it upon myself to offer my services."
Smiles
"I for one understand completely that some people just hate getting in front of crowds to make speeches or just simply can't come up with anything to say. That is fine, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. Although, wouldn't it be nice to get your name out there? Wouldn't it be nice to have some sort of assistance in doing so?"
"Now mind you, this is all strictly confidential. All you have to do is notify me that you are interested in my assistance and we'll go from there. The pieces of work I do create will never be known to outside sources, so your work is your work once paid for."
"Why am I doing this you ask? It's simple really. For some time now I have been trying to get people more vocal in the streets. At times, I'd even make two speeches a day to see if I can bring some life them. I see that it has had a little bit of improvement, but still not enough. When brainstorming I tried to think of reasons why it's so quiet. I understand that there are just lazy folk who do nothing but care about their jailbreaks and coffee shop chatter. However; I know there are a lot of Mafioso's out there who would love to have something to say, and what better way to get things going than to give them a hand right?"
"Below is the price for which I charge, yes it's a bit pricey, but so are bribing officials to lock everyone up time after time which only lasts for one session, your speech is forever."
Standard Speech: $750,000
Competition: $1,250,000
"So there you have it. Sure to some this sounds like a stupid idea, but too those who need it? Trust me, it's worth it."
Dick lights a joint and heads back to his office for some paperwork |
