Johnny took a few steps out into the crowded streets. These streets that seemed to hum with a thousand stories. Some more interesting than others. Some ridiculous. Some just pathetic. But it seemed to be the measure of the times that storytelling was what the public wanted, so, wishing only to participate, Johhny called an audience, cleared his throat and began...

***

It was a dark and stormy night. Our hero's boots sank deep into the mud as he marched dutifully toward his destination. His mind wandered with thoughts of what had happened and what had yet to come. The heavy suction of his boots squelching in and out of the wet mud, was as distracting as it was energy sapping. Squelch, thunk, squelch, thunk, squelch, thunk. For some reason he started thinking about his mother. Shuddering at the directions his ungoverned thoughts could wander, he slapped himself firmly across the face.

"Snap out of it, man. Concentrate!"

Forcing his mind back on track he forged ahead. The barn was supposed to be up ahead, but it was difficult to see with the driving rain and the memory of that woman's weeping ringing in his mind. So much moaning for so little pleasure. He took a look at his watch. Morning soon. He looked at the sky. He carried on. The reader grew weary. Just when all hope seemed lost, the fuzzy outline of the barn he'd been seeking, hoved into view. A crack of light grew brighter as the large barn door opened and a broad-shouldered silhouette made a welcome sight. Charlie made out a welcoming voice in the distance.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU? GET OVER HERE YOU EMBARRASSING EFFEMINATE JELLY!"

Ah the warm bosom of a friendly voice. He smiled and replied to his old friend.

"I would'a been sooner but I got stuck in your sister's ass!"

Charlie always enjoyed a good bit of manly back and forth with the guys. Always made him feel on par, equal, one of the fellas...

"DON'T TALK TO ME LIKE THAT YOU SPINELESS FUCKING WORM. ONE MORE NOISE OUTTA YOU AND I'LL LET OLD LEEROY FUCK YOU IN FRONT OF THE GIRLS, AGAIN!"

Charlie chuckled to himself. Tony really did have the quickest comebacks. He winked and smiled as he past into the warm light of the barn, the heavy handed punch he got on the cheek just made him feel welcome in that special way only family could. There was the usual gathering, waiting for their package. Charlie opened his jacket, carefully placed the large weighty parcel on the table and was quickly knocked out of the way by Brenda. Brenda was a looker but Christ she had a hook on her. A hooker with a hook! Charlie smirked as he stepped backwards and nursed his two sore cheeks. 

The gang tore open the paper wrapping and all had a very thorough smell of what was inside. What was inside? Charlie had no idea but it made everyone very excited and extremely enthusiastic about everything. They were eager to keep smelling it too! After a few minutes the gang were all laughing and drinking together, he tried to join in but was routinely rebuffed with harsh words or dismissive blows. Charlie didn't mind, he knew the way to earn trust was to endure whatever they threw at you. Abuse and ridicule for an undetermined number of years, that was the normal path to respect and eventually his button. At least that's what one-eye'd-Jake had assured him at 5am after a very challenging night. After that, he'd be in. No more the piss-mop, the vomit-licker or sacrificial arrest. No. The days of being tormented and abused would be over and he'd be the one in the fancy suit, smelling the special parcels and making some other initiate drink from the piss can in the corner.

The very deep and dreadfully familiar voice of LeeRoy, broke his daydream.

"Hey liddle man. Why don't you go bend over that barrel and drop your pants for me like the good little bitch you are."

Charlie couldn't help but shudder at the direction his night was taking. He'd been given to LeeRoy a few times before and it was always a particularly difficult test. Tonight promised to be as much if not more of a match for previous experiences as the giant had an exceedingly rapacious look in his eye. Charlie felt like the great beast may just devour him. Never the less, this was the life he'd chosen. That long held dream of climbing out of a new Cadillac wearing a shiny silver suit and getting all the respect from the parking valets as he did, was a beautiful idea. A glowing thought that would keep him safe while the relentless thrusting of LeeRoy's massive shaft, breached him again and again until the great man was spent and Charlie's frail frame, collapsed. 

"Ok LeeRoy. But go easy this time, eh?"

"I'm gonna rip you in fuckin' half, you pasty little white-ass pussy. Now drop them damn pants and take what I gotta give ya!"

This night would prove as long and impossible as Chrlie's chances of achieving his dream. Charlie did as he was asked and LeeRoy did as he promised. 

"UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

***

Johnny looked around at the captivated faces of his audience. Maybe captivated wasn't the right word. Perhaps horrified, shocked or disgusted would have been better. Still, impact was impact and it was attention that appeared to be the goal. He addressed the gathering.

"A tough life for our protagonist, I'm sure you'll all agree. Maybe too harsh? I'm not so sure. Seems no more than half the street authors out here deserve anyway. I can't say I quite understand this preoccupation with boring us all half to death with ridiculous stories, but there's a lot of it about. So I thought to myself, Johnny, if they want far-fetched, pointless stupidity, lets give them just that!

So here we are. A short story (because I do have some mercy) which, for all it's gruesome graphics, was a better read than most of the drivel clogging up these once fine avenues of discussion. So I wonder, really, why have most of the bosses around not shot half these fuckwits for being so fucking boring? Incredible change of direction for a once great society, and no mistake."

Seemingly resigned to street life being one dimensional these days, Johnny pushed his massive hands into his jacket pockets and trundled off into the crowd.