Dick donning a cape and a leotard with wings approaches the mic. Looks like Dick got into the Shrooms again.

"Recently I have spotted some unusual things ranging from flying pigs, ShiftyWaffle covered in tropical fruit, and odd people approaching me with odd remarks and statements."

"I don't care if you heard that Geneva sexually assaulted mashy with a hamster and dental floss. I could give a damn if Badger-Fist was planning on using his large fist to penetrate my "security" at the door of the Head Quarters to later attempt to assassinate me as I cuddle next to my stuffed bear pookie... That's right, my bitch sleeps on the ground. Women come and go, my pookie however, will be by my side forever."

Yeah he's starting the feel them now

"Anyways the point I'm getting to is this. Maybe some people like to hear what is being said behind their backs, maybe some people like hear someone else's rant and raves within the coffee shops. I for one, am not one of those Mafioso's. As a matter of fact, I despise you. I don't care if your best friends nieces went ape shit and stole Altidores virginity, I don't want to hear it. I will not promote Omerta violators. There is too much work involving seperating the bullshit from the reality. I can see how it can be beneficial, but I also can see the issues it can bring. I for one don't want any of my family running their mouth and if that's the case I would like to know. When you go and break peoples trust in that manner, then you really have no place to call yourself a Mafioso."

Someone steps up in the crowd

"Who are you to tell people what to do? So what, you haven't ever done some shady shit before?"

Dick smiles

"Everyone does shady shit, but there is a difference when the intentions are for the negative and recently there has been a increase in accusations, disrespectful gestures, as well as slander amongst chatter. Yes it always happens and will continue, I'm just simply stating that I no longer want to hear about it. I have sat back and witnessed, thought, then came to the realization that it's better just to tune the bullshit out. We as a people allow antics such as these to choose or paths for us rather then follow our own. It's a distraction, and really just a side show attraction that no longer reaps the benefits of my attention. It's a warning to some, don't always believe what you hear. Before you make rash decisions, think to yourself, "What the fuck am I doing? If it was me looking at myself from an outside perspective what would I think of my actions?" and 90% of the time you will change your mind."

"This is not directed to the ordinary chatter, this is directed primarily to those with the intentions to begin something that they don't have the power to do themselves, and that's causing Chaos."

"Now please excuse me, I must get back to my fairy catching and weed smoking. Feel free to join the party, just head to my bakery, knock twice and say "Hey hey tricky dicky," to be granted access.

Dick skips off down the alley toward his bakery