Oriana stoked the fire in the cabin and worked to get the place habitable again. Structurally, the cozy place in the middle of nowhere had held up well, but it was dirty inside. The cabin was in the Krýsuvík region, located higher up in the mountains than most travelers would go. It offered extreme solitude. The drive up to the cabin was treacherous; the road had been made very recently and wasn't paved. It was the sort of place one went to to get away from the outside world.

The sky above the cabin was a murky grey, but Oriana suspected that it would become a vibrant blue in better weather. The mountain air was cold, but crisp and refreshing, when the sun was out, but dangerously chilled at night. There were several hot springs within a few miles of the cabin, and an old letter left on the table inside inside detailed which were generally safe to visit. The cabin itself was simple; it had only three rooms. The main room had a large fireplace, two very comfortable chairs by the fire that seemed old and worn, and a small table with an old deck of cards, a stack of books, and a couple bottles of Irish whiskey. The bedroom was small, with a mattress that seemed well made, if rarely used.  The bathroom was old and the paint had faded; inside, there was only a tiny shower and toilet.

Ori walked in and studied herself in the dusty mirror. She’d cut her hair short and dyed it blonde during her journey north from Italy. Grunting, Ori lifted the packages she’d brought with her. Taking a deep breath, she set up a broom and some washcloths that she found in the closet and slowly got to work. Still sore and tired from her surgeries in Rome, it was slow going. But as she settled into one of the chairs by the fire in the evening, the place was in decent shape. It was ready for Tara. And so was Oriana. It had been two weeks since they’d parted ways in Marseille, Jo accompanying Tara and Ren returning to Rome. After a slow journey north, Ori was finally here, keeping her promise to Aurora. 

After a few minutes looking at the fire, she fell asleep. 

*** 

The earth seemed to breathe here.  Tara stared out the window at the flat land, rocky, and red-brown like old blood.  It was unforgiving in places, and broken only occasionally by the most brilliant greens she’d ever seen.  It was as if someone had taken the most vibrant places in her dreams of her Canadian homeland and scorched them - leaving them still smoking in places from the fires.  Despite the heat in the ground, the air was frigid as night was starting to fall and outside Tara knew it wouldn’t be long before she’d find herself able to see her breath- if she couldn’t already.  

The mountains were lovely.  Jagged knives reaching up towards the heavens, as if threatening God himself.  Snow-capped in places, ice it seemed might never melt here in some spots.  And yet, in others, the waters bubbled on the sides of what passed for a road leading towards what she hoped would be a cabin she’d only ever read about.  Her mother had come here after she’d thought Billy had died.  What most of her siblings didn’t know was that her mother had made a second pilgrimage.  In all the years they’d spent in Canada, only twice had Aurora left Billy behind with the children to take her own outings.  Two trips.  A total of three weeks in almost two decades in which Aurora walked out in the world alone, not as a wife and mother… but as herself, the lioness.  

Tara had only suspected what occurred on those trips, at least until she found evidence of a trip to Iceland at home in her mother’s desk while she was away in Italy with Oriana and Brigitte.  That confirmed that at least one trip had been back to the last place in which she and her father Gavin had spent time alone.  Not a surprise considering all that Tara knew of her mother’s secret rage at her father, and eventual peace with it.  

Still, as the cabin came into sight, Tara wondered where her mother had gone on that second trip.  Without a journal, without her father to ask, she realized that might never know the answer to that question.  What had Aurora thought was so important that she left her children and husband behind for a full week and risked her life?  A second visit to Iceland to grieve her father in private made sense, but where else mattered to her half so much as this place?  If not place… what person?

Tara got out of the vehicle and looked up at the sky.  The stars were only just starting to appear and already the haze of greens and blues were beginning to be seen.  The northern lights.  I’ve missed you so!  

Tara used to sit outside at night, wrapped up in a blanket watching them with her mother and siblings when she was small.  Staring up at the sky in the way people stared at stages during a performance of a play.  Enrapt.  In awe of the wonder which God created.  She took a long, slow, deep breath - knowing Oriana had to have heard the car pulling up.  She wanted to run to her, at least on some level, and yet the world had slowed again.  There was no need to rush.  No one was waiting for them now.  There was no urgency, no one in need of something only she could do.  The dead were dead.  The living were safe.  She and Ori were alone and after everything that had happened, maybe that unnerved her slightly.  These two weeks had been the longest, hardest, of her whole life and she’d never felt more alone … unsure of what was to happen next.  In a word, lost.  

Grabbing her bag out of the back of the car she trudged towards the cabin, the ground complaining under her boots.  She wasn’t dressed in those pretty clothes Brigitte had so loved her wearing, but in the clothing she felt most herself in.  Pants, sturdy and practical.  A button-down flannel, layers.  Her hair was bound up tight in a braid starting at her crown and hanging long down her back.  No make-up.  There was no one here to see her who did not already know her true face.  Tara was weary of wearing illusions after the last two weeks in the United States and now it was time to put the masks away and just be herself.  At least she knew she could do that with Oriana… or, she hoped she still could.  It had only been two weeks and yet it felt as if her whole life had changed in just over fourteen days.  Who knew if Oriana felt the same as she did the day they left for Italy.  That she was here, that at least seemed a good sign.
 

Ori was disturbed from an uneasy sleep as the car pulled up outside. It couldn’t be anyone else, but Tara… but better safe than sorry. Ori took a place in the darkest corner, wincing from the soreness, and pointed her gun at the door. 

Tara turned the door knob and as she began to open the door slowly she spoke, “It’s me.”  She knew better than to startle Oriana. Tara heard a safety click. She peeked in before pushing the door open all the way and entering, tapping her boots at the door before entering fully.  Dropping her heavy bag she looked around at the simple room described in her mother’s journal and found it to be very much what she’d expected - if aged.  

Her head turned from one end of the cabin to the other slowly and it wasn’t until she’d seen all she could from the door until she looked to Oriana and finally greeted her with a somewhat understated, “Hello.”

“Hey, Tiger.” Ori emerged from the darkness into the light of the fire, short blonde hair evident as she holstered her gun and moved slowly toward Tara. She was wearing jeans and a flannel shirt, albeit very differently from what Tara would have picked. Whereas Tara tended to dress practically in these scenarios, Ori’s jeans were tight and more appropriate for a park than a forest, while her flannel shirt had the sleeves rolled up and a few buttons left open. Tara was reminded of their camping trip, where Ori had developed blisters within an hour and her clothes had barely survived the experience.  “What do you need right now?” asked Oriana. “Food? A shower? Sleep? Me? I’m sure it was a long flight. I won’t be offended if I’m not first on the list.” She smiled as she continued to move toward Tara. 

“Whiskey would be nice.”  She said, her voice was cool and distant less chatty and perky than usual.  “You’re on the list, just… I think I need to get settled a bit.”

 Ori nodded. She stopped at Tara and studied her for a moment. She wasn’t sure whether to kiss her or just walk past her. Forcing a small smile, she kept walking and poured two glasses. 

“Have you been here long?”  Tara made her way to a chair and began unlacing her boots.  Dry feet were key to warmth.. It was tempting to keep them on, but she knew her feet would sweat and that would be worse than going about in socks.

She handed Tara a glass of whiskey, sinking into the other chair near the fire. Ori clinked glasses with the other girl, not venturing a toast of her own but leaving Tara room for one if she wanted. 

“To friendly ghosts.  Departed friends and family.”  Tara said softly, her mind clearly on what she’d left behind in the United States as she didn’t hesitate to drink.

“I’ll drink to that,” said Ori in a small voice before sampling the whiskey. “How many ghosts are there? What’s going on stateside?”

“New York is under new management.  Everyone.  The loss is total.  Made men, associates… nothing left.  They didn’t just remove my father, Christian, Nikki and Cat…”

The corner of Ori’s lip twitched, but she didn’t interrupt as Tara continued speaking. 

“... they salted the earth.”  She said hoarsely as if she’d done a fair amount of crying in recent hours.  “It’s a wonder they let Gavin and the kids flee.  Some people are missing still.  Maybe they got out… but the odds of it aren’t good.”

“Brigitte?”

“Nothing.  She should have checked in by now.  I’ m guessing her body will turn up soon.”

“Shit.”

 “Mom… and Dad.”  she nodded.  “At least we had something to bury.  It looks like they went down easily.  Dad had ... a terrible gut wound, but the shots to the head did it I think.  Mom.  Him.  Together.  The cops had the bodies in the morgue in New York.  Looks like the men who did it at least gave them clean deaths and left them in a respectful place to be found and not preyed on by animals or something.  I paid people to take them to the family plot in South Philly.  They’ll rest by my parents and Aunt.”

As Tara spoke, Oriana looked angrier and angrier. Part of her wanted to throw her whiskey into the fire, jump in the car, and go avenge Cat and Tara’s parents. But it was no use. Tara stared at the fire, still not having touched her whiskey a second time.

Instead of indulging herself, she rested a hand on Tara’s knee. “I’m sorry, Tara. I know how you feel. And… I wouldn’t give up on Brigitte yet. She’s resourceful. If she was with your parents, but there wasn’t a body…” Oriana sighed. “I mean… it’s something. What about Gavin? The colors? The kids?”

Tara wet her lips and blinked not turning from the red-gold flames.  “Well, Gavin said that he got the call from mom and tried to get them all to plane like he was supposed to.  They never made it to the airport.  Ended up taking a train to Detroit.  Wouldn’t have even gotten on that if it wasn’t for Indigo and Azure.” She drew a breath and exhaled before taking another breath to finish relaying the story.

“Apparently some guys thought the cars were mom and dad trying to flee.  The colors saved them.  Cerise and Sage helped Gavin get the kids onto the train, Indigo and Azure they… held off some gunmen.  Apparently guys without buttons are always looking for a way to stand out in a war, ruthlessness … ensuring a legacy doesn’t continue, especially one as long as my family’s, is bragging rights.  Older mobsters won’t stand for that shit, kids and women are non-combatants but um… not all people hold to that ya know?  I was worried about Malcolm, but the crazy thing is he’s probably handling it better than anyone next to Cerise.  Sage is a wreck.  Izzy and Jack too.”

Oriana drained her whiskey, then angrily stood and smashed the glass in the fireplace. She paced for a moment, and again looked like she would run for the door, but she forced herself to sit back down. Tara wait for a moment, then kept speaking. She took a deep breath. “Okay.” She shook her head and took another. “Okay.”

Tara’s eyes fell to the floor, “We don’t have to talk about it.”

“I wanted to know. I’m just… angry. And sad.” She was already regaining her usual control. “And I just broke one of the four glasses we have.” She was quiet for a while. “I’m glad most of the kids made it out. Sounds like it could have been a lot worse, even though it’s… horrible.”

“It’s what it always was going to be.”  She shook her head slowly. “Another baby girl who won’t know her mother’s face.”  She scoffed and finally drank more of her whiskey and exhaled the burn in her throat.

“Yea. That’s not an easy thing,” agreed Ori, obviously thinking of her own mother as much as she tried to cover it. 

Tara looked up at Ori then, realizing what she was doing, “I’m wallowing.  Sorry. I just, I’m still processing. I spent a lot of time these last few days pretending like everything was going to be hunky-dorey and … well, it’s about as far from that as it can be.  I got my father’s will… and all the plans we were supposed to see put into motion and … wouldn’t you know it the fucking government is coming in like vultures to take everything.” she shook her head, tears filling her eyes.

“I don’t know how much will even be left once it’s over.  I promised Gavin that I’d find a way to take care of them no matter what happens to the money but… Christ Ori.”  she blinked. “Ren is right. I have nothing right now. I may have nothing at all and Gavin is … in the middle of nowhere with a bunch of kids.  And where the fuck am I right now?” She shook her head, a tear escaping her eye.

“I should be home.  I should be hustling to make sure they got everything they need the way I promised my parents I would.  Fighting for my father’s businesses, fighting for the last of the Luciano and Byrne empires… what little is left of them.”  she shook her head putting her drink down and her face into her hands.

Oriana swallowed. “You’ve got me, Tara. We’ll make it work. I’m your right hand. Even if you only wind up running a hot dog cart.” She kept talking, as if she were trying to jump right from the emotional talk to something easier. “And you’re here because your mother wanted you here. We can humor her for a few days, right?”

“Long enough for me to find whatever she wanted me to find.”  Tara said softly, not yet lifting her head.  “Whatever she brought here when I was ten.”  she sighed a shuddering sigh and scrubbed her eyes sniffling back her snot in a slightly unattractive way.  “Was there anything in the cabin?”

“No, but if you don’t mind me saying so, your mother didn’t seem like the type to make it easy for you for something like this.”

“She likes puzzles almost as much as me.  She’s kinda stupid like my dad about pretending she’s a mook - truth is she’s all heart and more brains than she ever wanted to admit.  I think she sometimes felt like if she was smarter it made her less like her father… and more like Nona Bella.  Of course, in the end, I suppose no one could deny she was like Nona Bella.  Not even her.”  She sighed.  “When did mom ask you to do this?  I mean, it had to be recently, maybe in Italy?”

“Yea. I think so. Either there or right after. I think it was when we were back?” Ori frowned. “I… have a shitty memory sometimes. I don’t know if you know that about me yet. I’m usually fine when I’m focused on a mission, but things tend to slip away from me. I remember the conversation, just not the context.”

Tara nodded, “Well, I guess at least you can say you got me here.  Mission accomplished, right?”  She smiled at Oriana.  

“I missed you, Tara. More than I thought I would. I’m excited to see you here, even if we’ve been talking for half an hour and you haven’t commented on the fact that I chopped off my hair and dyed it blonde.” Ori took her winter hat off, trying for a smile from Tara. Her hair had been mostly covered by the hat, but a few strands had stuck out enough to be noticed by anyone not so distracted.

Tara stared at the hair and a small smile tugged at the corner of her mouth.  “Come here.”  She whispered and patted her thigh.

Ori rose with only a small wince, then sat on Tara’s lap, lacing her fingers behind Tara’s neck. 

Tara reached up and touched Ori’s hair, running her fingers through it.  “It’s striking.  Your eyes seem brighter.  It’s going to take some getting used to though.  I was fond of it long but this, it’s … powerful.”  she smiled at Ori.  “Very fitting.  Sexy.”

“It’s just temporary. I had to make my way up through France. Ireland. Then here. I figured anyone looking for me wouldn’t expect it, and it’d help me fit in up here.”

Tara dropped her voice a bit, “Shall I say hello to you properly now?”  She let her hand slide from her hair to her cheek and guided Ori towards her lips for a slow, gentle kiss.

“Better,” smirked Ori.

“I’m sorry you were alone for so long,” said Tara.  “I wanted to rush back to you, but there was a lot to do.” 

“Ren stayed with me as I moved up to Normandy. And I made a couple friends in Ireland. Speaking of, I assume Jo stayed in the States?”

“Yes.  I asked her to do me some favors so we had somewhere to come home to.  I’ve made a few connections with some folks who I knew from my time working as Dad’s right hand while mom was away.  Made sure we wouldn’t catch a bullet when we showed up stateside. Made sure we had a home far away from Gavin and the kids where we could work… assuming, of course, you do mean what you say about that hot dog cart and that you want to come back with me?”

Tara smirked.

“We’ll name it after Bacchus. He’d love that.”

“Well, if you think that’s the bee’s knees… you’ll adore what I have her doing with my briefcase.  You see, my Dad left each of us kids a briefcase full of cash. That’s what Gavin’s using to feed and care for the kids right now.  Their briefcases. A million each.”

“You know, he did say I was family. But I suppose the 5 million he gave me for the Italian job covers that.”

“Don’t be stupid.  You have a case and you are mentioned in the will.”

Ori seemed genuinely shocked.

“Which, is a bit of a laugh in and of itself.  You’ll just … roll your eyes.  Trust me,” said Tara.

“Why?”

“My Dad wanted me to be wrong about something, desperately.  He also wanted to make sure you always had a home.”  She smiles sadly.  “The deed to our family’s house in New York… it’s yours, Oriana.  It’s held in trust until you meet certain conditions.  Assuming that you do it was my father’s words to the lawyer that said - you should be the one to have it so that you would never again not have a home.”

“Do I get to know these conditions? Or are they secret?” She shifted on Tara’s lap, deflecting her emotional response.

“They’re pretty insane honestly, are you sure you want to hear it?  My father is a sap… was a sap.”  she sighed.

“I’m… going to leave that up to you. You can tell me if you want to. If you’d rather not, that’s fine. But… in some ways, it doesn’t matter. It’s a nice spot. But I don’t see you going back there anytime soon. And I-” plan on staying with you- “well, I don’t see myself needing a place in New York.”

“When I realized…”  she sighed.  “I came home from Vassar a terrible wreck after the whole, you trying to kill mom thing.  I was, well, shit was happening and I thought I was in over my head and I came back to see mom and dad.  Dad pushed and pushed and I just… told him everything.  I told him about how I felt about myself… and about you.  About women.  I waited for him to just, break down or get mad.  I don’t know why I was afraid he would.  Maybe I guess I thought he’d worry about my soul - he’s very religious.  Was.  Religious.”  she looked down at Oriana’s lap before starting again. 

“I told him I was sorry that I’d never be what he hoped for.  That there wouldn’t be a big church wedding and dozens of grandchildren.  And then he just laughed at me.” She smiled and shook her head.  “He got us bowls of ice cream, Vanilla.  Simple.  Simple for when the world is complex.  Of course, he had to tell me I was being an idiot.  He told me one day I’d find someone and I’d love them and if we wanted kids we’d have them.  He compared me to these two old ladies he knew from his neighborhood … that I’d grow old with a ‘best friend’ and everyone would know but no one would say anything.  They’d just… ignore it and I’d be happy and he’d be happy and it would be as married as I needed to be.  That was all he wanted for me, was to know that I wasn’t alone.”

Her voice broke at the last word and she recomposed herself, “Anyway, I told him he was mad.  I got in a fight with him really.  We so rarely do that.  Did that.  Anyway, so… I told him that he was living in a fantasy world.  There was no place in the world where I’d ever feel okay to be open with how I felt about another woman.”  she laughed.  “Of course that was before The House of Pleasure.  And he told me that… he bet me that I would be wrong.  That one day, I would stand before an official and declare my love for another person.  I just… let him be wrong and hugged him.  I figured what was the harm in letting my Dad think a happy thought about a future I knew would never happen.”

She shrugged.  “So fast forward to me and the will.  I’m the executor, ya know.  It’s the first time I’ve read the damn thing.  And it’s full of stuff that just ripped me up.  He thought of everything.  Big Dumb Billy was never any of those things.”

I mean he was Big. And he was Billy,” interjected Ori.

“Okay but wasn’t dumb.  So some of those things… but not dumb.”  She smiled. “And I come across this deed of trust.  And your name and the line about how if you want to ever have the property - for it to belong to anyone again, you will have to stand before lawyers and tell them that you intend to marry me.  I mean, clearly we can’t… legally. But that you make the declaration. That’s the requirement. That’s what my big dumb father did to you. To give you a home and family… he wrote this whole damn letter about how you … you’re one of us.  And that he loved you. And he loves me. And he didn’t want us to be alone.” She leaned her head against Ori’s chest and stopped talking then.

“I had a dream about your dad,” said Ori, stroking Tara’s hair and thinking. “He… made me pancakes. Made me talk about my feelings. When I was knocked out in Sperlonga.”

“I dreamed about poker with my parents, grandparents, and great aunt… and you.”

“I bet I won.”

“You did.” She said chuckled. “All in on a royal flush.”

Ori shrugged expectantly, smiling. “Mathematically unlikely. But I’ll take it.”

“Yea, well, I think it was less about the cards and more about the message of not letting things get in the way of what matters most, especially when it’s hard.”

“Stop taking the focus off my victory.” Ori shifted on Tara’s lap again. The blonde winced and slid off, let a hand trail down Tara’s arm. “I think we should go to bed. Not like that. Just… sleep. And then tomorrow, I’ve got a present or two for you. And we’ll go for a walk.”

“Presents?  Shit. I didn’t bring you anything.  That hardly seems fair.” She shrugged.  

“If it makes you feel any better… they’re from your Mom. I’ll show you now, if you really want.”

“No.  I can’t take anymore tonight.  I need to be naked under some blankets with you… not like that… just.. close.  I want nothing between us tonight.”

“That’s what I want, too,” said Ori simply. 

Tara stood up and took Ori by the hand and without caring for much else, went looking for the biggest, and only, bed in the place.

***

It only took three seduction attempts by Oriana before Tara reminded her of her injuries and threatened to tie her to the bed, which led to the fourth seduction attempt. But Tara held out, and soon Ori had succumbed to her tiredness. They held each other as they slept, the way that people hold onto life preservers in a storm.

When Tara woke up, Ori wasn’t in bed. Cold, grey light shone in through the window. Taking a deep breath, Tara noticed the smell. As she stepped out into the main room, she noticed Ori standing in the kitchen, wearing only a large flannel shirt that fell to her upper thigh. There was a 
pile of burned pancakes on the counter, along with a smaller pile of undercooked pancakes. 

Tara walked out to the kitchen, wrapped up in her blanket and came up behind Oriana to put her arms and the blanket, still warm from sleep, around her lover.  “The key,” She said softly, “Is the bubbles.  You see how the pancake is bubbling?  When those little bubbles start to pop, that’s time to flip it.  Once you flip you can almost certainly predict it’s done in less than a minute on the other side.  Then done.  Try it.”

Oriana looked like she’d thought of three or four responses, but she just nodded and follow the directions precisely. They were sitting next to the fire five minutes later, eating their breakfast.

“There’s bacon, too. I just… didn’t know where to start. No one ever taught me how to cook.”

“I’ll teach you,”  Tara said with a mouth full of pancakes.  “Is … that vanilla?”  she said with surprise.  “Did you put vanilla in the batter?”

“Yes. I thought that’s what you were supposed to do?”

Tara began to cry.  “I thought you said no one ever told you how to cook?”  She laughed through the tears.  “My dad … he’s the only one I ever knew who did that.  Vanilla in the damn pancakes.”  she laughed harder and the tears started to lessen as she nodded.  “Yeah.  That’s how you make ‘em.” 

“I must have seen him do that… did you sleep okay?”

She sniffled, her smile not fading.  “Better than I have in weeks.”  She admitted truthfully.  “I’ll be glad to be putting my head on my own pillow when we get to Philadelphia.”

“Well, we’ve got a couple days here.” said Oriana.  “Can I show you the things from your mom now?”

“Yeah.  Let’s do that.”  She said a bit brighter.  “No time like the present to start Sherlock and Watsoning whatever mom left us.  You and me. Another wild adventure. Yes?” she shook her head, realizing now that she had been absolutely right about Bella and Gavin’s adventures.  They were the best and worst of things… and now she understood the vanilla ice cream. Of course, she wished that she didn’t.

Oriana had popped up immediately, then removed a long, leatherbound package that she handed to Tara. 

“Well it’s not a toaster oven for our new place.  I’m guessing it’s also not …”

As Tara unwrapped the leather, she found a finely crafted wooden bow. Tara went silent.  On the grip, she found that a thumbprint had been skillfully etched into the leather. Tara ran her thumb along the print gently, staring at it as if looking at a ghost.

“It’s lovely.”  She whispered.  

“I have one, too.”

“You don’t know how to use one … and you hate them.”  She shook her head. “I distinctly remember your disdain for the archaic things, wasn’t that what you called them?” Tara was clearly being playful but her words weren’t untrue. 

“I mean… I used to have disdain for you, too, before I got to know you better. And… every member of your family, really. But things can grow on me. Apparently. I can see a… romance in it, I guess. Or maybe I’m just contriving this entire situation and pretending to care so you can put your arms around me and teach me how to shoot…”

Tara nodded, “A very likely scenario considering last night.  Lucky for you I’m inclined to indulge your fantasy. I enjoy bows enough that I’ll risk you getting a little sore for it.  Just don’t press your luck. I refuse to drive you down the mountain just to hunt down a doctor. I may leave you on the mountainside for the reindeer.”

“Reindeer… don’t eat people,” said Oriana, 90% sure.

“How would you even know?” asked Tara. “The sum total of your wildlife experience comes from parks in a city I think.”

“I’m mostly relying on my knowledge of Christmas from New York department stores.”

“Then you are seriously fucked, my friend.”

“Not ‘til I heal up a bit more.”

Tara rolled her eyes.

“I should warn you. I’m a natural. Your mother beat me in a competition, but I made her sweat. My first time, too.”

“Oh so now you and Mom were having secret robin hood matches and I wasn’t invited?  First she’s asking you to drag me off to places I’ve never been, then giving you secret gifts and now you’re having private archery lessons?  Yeesh.  What’s next?”

“She came to buy you something from Leo.” Ori’s voice grew quieter. “I… have something for you, too. If you want it now. It can wait. Not important,” she said.

“Of course it’s important, it’s from you.  Though I have to ask about this print first… do you know whose it is or what it’s all about or is this part of mom’s mystery do you think?  Or artistry from the craftsman?”

“It’s… your mom’s. I don’t think it’s a clue or anything. I think she just wanted to know that her thumb had been there. Like you were holding it together.” Ori halted, her comment having come out more emotional than she’d intended.

“That sounds like mom.”  She admitted.  “Okay…”  she said putting the bow down reluctantly.  “Your turn.”

Ori retreated as fast as she was able. She emerged from the bedroom with a box, which she handed nonchalantly to Tara. Ori seemed more nervous than usual. Tara opened the box to find a curved, gleaming blade with an ivory handle inside a leather sheath. It was five or six inches long. Before Tara could say anything, Ori started talking. “It’s a westernized version of a karambit- from Southeast Asia. According to legend… the first karambits were made to match the claws of a tiger.” Ori glanced at Tara, seemingly waiting for a reaction, but trying to look like she wasn’t.

Tara stared at the knife a moment before picking it up.  Her brown eyes lit up, her lips turned into a smile easily and she first rolled the knife around to look at it and then held it in her hand two different ways before nodding.  “Ori, it’s lovely.” Ori visibly exhaled and smiled.  “I … I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything like it before.  I didn’t even know they made knives this shape.  It’s, I mean, look at the metal it really does look like a claw!”

She looked up and met Oriana’s eyes, “It’s perfect.”  she said in the way that only a young girl in love could say such a phrase.  The knife was to her what flowers or candy or jewelry might have been to another girl.  It spoke to her of Oriana’s care and attention to what mattered to her and also to what was important to Oriana.  It was something that connected them.  This knife and Tara’s love of tigers.  

“So… you won’t leave me to be eaten by a reindeer, then?” asked Ori.

“No.  I won’t.  You’re too tough and gamey for them anyway.  There’s only one predator here in Iceland you need to worry about eating you after a gift like this.”  She smirked. “And it’s not the reindeer.”

Ori smiled. “I’m feeling healthier already.”

“They say the hot springs here have healing properties-

“Let’s go. Now?” Ori jumped at the suggestion.

Tara laughed, stealing her grandfather’s line about the Jamaican underground pool.  “Maybe we should plan to take a dip at some point on our walk today? We’ll pack a few things so we don’t freeze to death on the walk back.  We’ll take a lunch and the bows. We’ll make an afternoon of exploring.”

“Great. I’ll go get dressed. Better to take a hot shower first? Or will that just make me feel colder?”

Tara smirked.  “No. Let’s skip the shower and not go out into the cold wind with wet hair.”  She winked at Oriana. “You’ll thank me for it on the walk back to the cabin when you realize how cool it feels.”

“Okay, you’re the boss,” said Ori, making her way back to the bedroom.  

Tara dressed and strapped on her new knife.  “Where should I wear it? Like this?” she asked, indicating to her hip on her belt.  “I mean in the city that won’t fly but here I guess it’s practical, right?”

“I’d say so. I’ve heard stories about women who actually tie it into their hair. Leave the handle out like an ornament, keep the blade under their hair and-”

Jokingly she held the knife up so that the rounded backside of the knife curved between and around one of her breasts.  “Hmmm maybe I could get a special bra sheath?” She laughed. “Talk about a serious underwire.”

“Tempting. But too risky. I’d get stabbed three times a day.”

“You’d like it.”  Tara joked and finished getting ready before packing a small bag of supplies including food and towels and some dry clothing just in case.  Her mother had always cautioned it was better to be overly prepared on trips into unknown terrain than not and Tara wasn’t ignoring that today.

Ori generally packed whatever Tara did; she also took two quivers of arrows, one of which she handed to Tara. Tucking her short hair under her hat, she grinned at Tara and spun around, showing off the winter gear she’d changed into. “Am I ready?”

“You’re a vision of loveliness… how are those feet?  Good socks I hope?  I’m not sure how this landscape is for hiking but I don’t want you getting blisters again.”  

“I have to wear socks?”

“You ARE joking, right?”  Tara arched an eyebrow.

“Yea. But do I need two pairs? Or is one okay? Or do you need to inspect my feet?”

“Proper foot care is no joke.  I’ll inspect every inch of you when we get to that hot spring on this list.”

“Promise?”

“Absolutely.  Not like I gotta worry about getting you knocked up, right?”  She winked at Oriana.  “I’m looking forward to enjoying some very gentle quality time with you today.  Emphasis on VERY.”  With that Tara headed for the door and out into the cold.

Tara led the way; it had snowed lightly the night before, and her feet crunched in the snow. Ori followed behind her, watching Tara’s figure and her footsteps. The cold air hurt her injured lung, but in a way that mixed pleasure and pain. More than once, Tara decided that they “needed to stop and take care of something”, just to give Oriana a chance to catch her breath. Neither woman mentioned the real reason they were stopping, even if they were both aware.

Ori liked being outside, even if it was challenging. Tara noticed the blonde- she still wasn’t used to that- smiling wider and even laughing more regularly. She was less aloof than she’d ever been before, and Tara found herself studying Ori’s grey eyes and red cheeks as the other woman stared at the mountains.

“I spent so much time looking at mountains growing up…” said Ori.

“I never saw them before.”  Tara admitted. “I mean, where I was, it wasn’t anything like a mountain.  This is… amazing.” She looked at Oriana and then asked, “Do you miss it sometimes? Your old life?”

“Yes.”

“I think that’s normal.  To miss something when it’s gone even if it wasn’t always good.”

“I miss the… camaraderie. The other girls and I grew up together in the shadow of those mountains. We named ourselves after them. We were a team. I was the best, and everything made sense… even if now it seems fucked. I was lost for a while, when I was on the run by myself. I was made to hunt in a pack, and then…” she waved her hand. “But I felt better when I had Cat. You. Your parents. Brigitte.” Her voice got quiet. “Just you, now. Don’t get eaten by a reindeer, please.”

“A pack…”  she said wistfully.  “Hm. Nice choice of words.  I think I can handle not getting eaten by a reindeer today at least.”

“I did read Aurora’s journal. I may have a bad memory, but some things stick.”

She nodded.  “Of course. So-

“If you ever want to leave me… you have to tell me right away. Okay?”

Tara narrowed her eyes, “You’re not joking right now.”

“I said if. I know what you said. But people change sometimes. I’m just saying… promise me you’ll tell me if you want to leave me. Or if you want anything about you and me to change. And… I won’t bring up you leaving again.”

“You know, there are times I think you’re about the toughest bitch I’ve ever met and then… I see things in your eyes that make me wonder if I know you at all.  And that maybe, just maybe, you’re not totally wrong that there is a lot more about you I need to understand.” She put a hand out and touched Oriana’s upper arm.  “I swear to you I will always be honest with you and that I have no intentions of ever leaving you, Oriana Montini. If God has made me a better partner in all the world, I would be shocked to learn of it.  You … fit. In all the ways that matter you fit me and I hope you feel the same way about me. I’ll shut up now.” She said smiling slightly.

Oriana bristled initially, like she wasn’t sure whether to be offended, but she settled when Tara took her arm. She looked out at the mountains and listened as Tara spoke. Ori’s mouth opened, then closed, but she nodded, although it was unclear what she was nodding to. “Thank you.”

“I think I see now why mom wanted you to bring me here,” said Tara.  “I mean, this place is incredible.  I guess that’s why Grandpa Gavin picked it… though I have to wonder how the hell he came across it.”

“I wish I could meet him,” said Ori, leaning against Tara. “Your mother wrote about him like he was...  something else. I’m sure she exaggerated.” Ori paused. “To be honest… I kind of want to fight him. See what would happen. If I could take him. I mean, I know he trained your mom, and she-” Ori halted, then continued. “She was good.” Ori started walking again, taking Tara’s hand in hers. “So are we practicing first then hot springs? Or other way around?”

Tara chuckled.  “You would have lost to him in his prime.  Not because you’re not skilled… I think you’ve had more training, but there is a spirit some people have.  My grandpa, if you believe my grandmother’s journal, he didn’t know how to lose.  He just kept going when he should have fallen over.  Like he was just too stubborn to die or stop.  Come to think of it… maybe you are like him a bit.”  She winked at Ori.

“But he was a force of nature, that’s what Brigitte calls him.  She’s the only one of us who knew him.  She tells stories about him, but even she admits she was little when he died.  She only ever spoke about that day one time.  I think it affected her a lot more than anyone knew.  Dad and mom were pretty beside themselves, and their whole world went to shit so maybe they weren’t paying the sort of attention to Brigitte that they should have been.”  She drew a breath.  “I think that’s why she is the way she is… always trying to be the brightest star in the room.  Like if she tries hard enough everyone will forget all the bad things. Like, she has to be the one to save everyone… she doesn’t really get that it’s not her job.  Or that maybe she’s not the one with the best set of skills for it.  So, she just… does things.  Like, screaming at that bear when we were kids.”  she shook her head.  “Or jumping into the ring with Rex.  Brigitte doesn’t always think.  She just… does.  Like Grandpa Gavin.”

She looked to Oriana, “If she’s alive, she’s doing something stupid.  She should have called Gavin by now.  She knew the plan was to go to Port Huron.  I can’t imagine why in the hell she’d leave Gavin to think she’s dead.  Or any of the kids.  I mean… a phone call, it would save everyone so much pain and stress.”  Tara pressed onward looking off towards one of the few trees on the horizon.  “More rocks than trees in this place…”  she said regretfully.

“I used to climb up in trees a lot back home.  Was one of my favorite things to do.  Usually where I did my best thinking.”  She glanced back to Oriana, “Were you much into climbing trees as a kid?  I’m guessing not… maybe buildings though?  Rocks?  You were near mountains I guess.”

“Maybe not the way you’re thinking. We had training in rock climbing. The intense stuff. Sometimes we had to infiltrate up a cliff or something…I liked it. Climbing axes. Ropes.”

Tara slowly weaved her way towards the tree, seemingly drawn to the lone pine on the landscape.  “You know Viola said that they used to let you win so you wouldn’t pitch fits about not being the best.”  she smirked. “I think she was being a bit of a fibber but I can imagine you being a poor loser from time to time.  I wish I had known you when you were younger… I bet we would have-”

“... no, no you don’t. I was horrible, Tara. I’m still horrible in some ways, but I’m better than I was. By a lot. Viola was right.”

“We’re all better.  That’s what growing up is about, right?  Being better than yesterday.”

“If you get the chance to do it.”

“And, if we do, not squandering it.  Right? Just… I know I’m …” She hesitated.  “No. You know what, I don’t have it in me today.  You’re right. You’re right.”  

Ori flashed a subdued smile. “I win again, I guess.”

Tara relented and kept walking in silence pushing on towards the tree and the small river she could see beyond it.  A creek, really. She had no particular reason why, it was just there and so, she walked on.

The pine was the tallest point on the plane they stood upon.  Rocks and cravasses line the landscape, a small bit of water here and there and mostly snowy patches interrupted by brilliant green grass and red-brown earth.  The tree alone seemed a marker of sorts and as Tara came closer she looked far up into its limbs listening to the birds she could hear, trying to identify them.  She did not, however, look at the large boulders lying here and there. As such, she did not see the scratches into the surface of one very large boulder that looked as if it had sat in its spot since the dawn of time.  Not scratched, Oriana realized, chipped… painstakingly so. Someone had used tools. Not someone. Not just anyone.  Aurora?

“I think I know that bird, but I have to be wrong.  Surely the same types of birds in Canada aren’t here in Iceland, right?  I mean it sounds kind of like one back home but…”

“What’s up with those rocks?”

Tara looked to the place where Oriana was indicating and walked over to the large rock, her brow furrowed as she knelt down to read the words which had likely taken days to put into the stone.  Painstakingly chipped into place for what would likely be lifetimes to come.
 

MAY YOU DRIVE FAST
RUN OFF WITH A STRANGER
LAUGH LOUDLY
RECKLESSLY PUNCH MOOSE
LEAP FROM PLANES
SAVOR BREAKFAST SLOWLY
GO ALL IN
AND KNOW THE LIST OF THINGS WE CAN’T DO TOGETHER IS:

 

Tara stared at the words.  Her hand touching them as she’d touched the thumbprint.  Her eyes teared up and she smiled.  “Yeah.”  She put her forehead against the rocks and spoke into the words, “That about sums it up.”

Ori came up and stood behind Tara. After a while, she rested a hand on Tara’s shoulder.

“You know,”  She said swallowing back the lump in her throat, “I don’t think I’ve often enough thought this thought… I hope to be as fucking awesome as my mother one day.”  She laughed.  Tara kissed the stone.

“I love you, mom,”  she whispered before standing up. Ori remained respectfully silent.

“She didn’t tell you about the rock,”  she scrubbed the tears from her eyes.  “I assume.  Well, then she’s every bit as bad as dad.  She could have asked me to come here on my own… but she must have wanted you here too.  She liked you, ya know.  I think she saw in you what she might have been… if things had been different.  She was an orphan.  Learned to fight young.  Saw some shit too young… I know she defended you like crazy to my Dad right out the gate, the very day you’d tried to kill her.  It was the damnedest thing.  She was always like that though… seeing things in people, I mean, for as fucked up as she could be sometimes… she had this quality that was good.  Just… good.  Not a lot of folks like my mom I think.  The world needs more Aurora Mastrosimones in it.”

“... I miss her. I feel like I knew her well, in a short time. But I wish I had more. I envy you that. Her. Your dad. It’s hard to come from nothing.”

“I think that’s why she didn’t lose her shit utterly when she found out you’d read her journal.”  she smiled.  “She just, she doesn’t … didn’t have it in her to be hateful.  She was tough, but inside she was this good person you know and if her taking a hit meant helping someone well, she’d take it.  Figuratively or otherwise, but I think you saw that.”  Tara shrugged and picked up her stuff.

Oriana looked at the rock for a while, then followed Tara.

“We’re not far from the spring if I read these notes right.  We can have lunch there. Soak a while. Plot how to avoid being eaten by local herbivores.” said Tara.

“Sounds good.”

The two young women went forward in silence.  Both lost to their thoughts and the grandeur of the place they were.  Here they had solitude, not another living soul to see or question them and in that Tara found peace.  No expectations or need to hustle, just watching each step making sure it was securely places among the rocky terrain.  Occasionally reaching back to take Oriana’s hand when they could walk as one. Eventually coming to a place where great billows of steam rose up towards heaven.

Tara looked at the paper.  “This is it.” She put down her bag.  “Shall we have lunch first? I mean, it’s not as nice as that breakfast you started us off with but it should help you recover from our little walk at least.”

“Recover? I’m fine,” panted Oriana. “I could race you back and win right now,” she said, wincing and lowering herself into a sitting position on a rock.

Tara walked over to the water and looked down at it, knelt and put her hand into it.  “Oh… wow. Now that’s a nice bath temp.”  

“So… how do we do this? Like, I understand that the water’ll be warm enough where we’re comfortable. But do we just freeze after? Do we do the bath, then sit by a fire to dry out?” Ori flashed a teasing smirk. “I’m far too civilized to know these things…”

“If I remember right, part of the thrill was enjoying the warm water and then being refreshed by the cool air as we walk back.  Something I once read suggested that it was good for circulation or something… hence my comment about it being medicinal. Healing.”  she smiled at Oriana, “Did you think I made that up just to get you naked in the wilderness?”

“Frankly, yes,” said Ori as she started to slowly remove her clothing, trying not to strain her core or her back too much. 

“Let me help you.”  she said without a hint of seduction.  Instead, Tara rose and walked briskly over to Oriana and attempted to help her with her bra. Oriana made an initial, perhaps subconscious, effort to resist the help, but seemed to recognize what she was doing at let Tara help.  “I can’t imagine getting at these hooks feels too good on those …” She took a moment to look at the still new flesh mending itself. There was scarring- there would always be scars. But things seemed to be healing nicely enough.

“My grandmother had been shot when she was about twenty-two.”  Tara said letting her fingers linger on Ori’s spine after unclasping her bra.  “She was protecting my mother’s birth mom. Dressed up as the Godmother Marie Lucania and was running around a war zone drawing fire off the real woman because she was pregnant with my mom.  The bullet’s tore her up bad, nearly killed her. She was deeply self-conscious about the scarring after the doctors had told her she’d never have children.”

“Tara… I honestly care about you and your family. But I am fucking freezing. Can we talk about this in the water?” Oriana sounded uncomfortable, but not pissed.

Tara laughed.  “Get in.”  She swatted Ori on the bottom and began to take off her clothing, continuing to speak.  “I was just going to say… you know what, never mind.  It doesn’t matter.”  She shook her head peeling away her layers of clothing and putting them far enough away from the water that they’d stay dry.

“You don’t need to change the subject,” said Ori, lowering herself gingerly into the water and sighing. “What were you going to say?”
Tara slid into the water and for a moment all coherent thoughts melted away as she found herself stunned by the cool air she was breathing and the warm water surrounding her body.  Closing her eyes she slipped down lower into the water; Ori mirrored her expression and pose.

“You know, that story’s opening… I just realized that if you’re not a part of my family how twisted and confusing it all is.  I mean, there’s this woman… a Godmother of a city, pregnant with a baby who is the half-sister of the woman who is pretending to be the Godmother to keep her safe.  A woman who will one day raise that unborn baby as her own daughter.  You almost need a road map to follow my family tree.”

“Guess it was complicated back then, too, huh?”

She nodded.  “Yeah.  Some really crazy things in those days too.  The point of my story was that scars are ... strange things.  I mean, Bella thought about them as ugly and horrible when she first got them.  A mark of all the things wrong with herself, the shortcomings of her life and the life she wanted.  Irony being that, at the time, she was doing everything to earn the love and attention of her father.”  she shrugged.  “A man who arguably either loved nothing more than money and power… or loved her as well as he could in his own twisted way, but loved her none the less.  Anyway, she eventually comes to see these scars as the most beautiful and strong parts of herself and eventually learns that they scars never took from her the thing she really and truly wanted… in fact, it led her to it.  It connected her to the man who became her partner and best friend, her husband.  A man covered in scars which she wrote extensively about, calling them beautiful.  Her pictures in her journal, they’re … uncanny.  She mapped him.  I swear she must have known ever line on his body.  I get it though.  I’d like to think eventually I’ll know you that well too.”

Tara let her foot touch Ori’s leg under the water, brushing up and down slowly against her.  “You look relaxed.  You know, I think this only proves that where-ever we live, it needs to have a serious bathtub.  Big enough for both of us.”