THE STAR-EXAMINER

Thursday, November 14, 2019       Issue Number 1

Welcome to the first issue of The Star-Examiner. This newspaper will be published at least once per week and will bring you the latest news and gossip! 

WRITING COMPETITION ENDS IN A TIE

CommissarZverev's latest writing competition, which boasted a grand prize of $20 million, ended in a three-way tie, with each judge picking a different winner. $10 million was awarded to each winner. The winners were tigg, EvilClown, and VIPCreditsGrin. An additional $2 million was awarded "For a valiant effort" to Neil_Anblomi.

THREE DEADLY DUELS

Three bloody duels were fought over the past 4 days, two of them involving The Soviet State capo and Chairman of the Iron Bank CommissarZverev, who challenged and killed both Consigliere Blackboard and Boss Amsterdam-Vallon. This was due to the Commissar's challenge to anyone who wished to see him swimming to duel with him. There were eight and nine rounds in the duels, respectively. A four-round duel between Goomba SquidMaster and Earner Zlokohotar ended in SquidMaster's death. The winner later committed suicide. An additional duel occurred back on November 8.

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HAVE NEWS? HEARD SOME GOSSIP? LET US KNOW HERE!

Dominic-Editor

Published in Detroit, MICH

A good piece, Dominick.  One correction, though; Consigliere Blackboard and Boss Amsterdam-Vallon both challenged me, not the other way around.

A good reply, Commissar. One correction, though; you're speaking to Dominic of Detroit, not Dominick of Chicago. 

walks away grumbling at the number of folk hitting her boss up for a new suit