A man that has not been seen as of late on these streets steps out of the light donning a leotard with cockey painted on the front with an arrow pointing down.

"Yes it is me! The one Dick women love and men hate! Well hopefully most men hate the Dick most of the time. However if you are a Male, and you like the Dick. I don't hate, go be your bad selves and shake those rears. Why not? TheWildCard does!"

Pulls a blunt out of his pocket and sparks up

"Surely you couldn't have missed me that badly. A Dick spitting his knowledge as much as I once was can be a bit messy at times don't you agree? So I took some time, sat in my bakery, teaching the fine arts of strudel decorating to my family yet observing everything going on outside my window. Yes I have been quiet, yet very observant. Please let me show you."

Observations made by the Dick himself.

* Feb. 4th 17:56 - Ms. Molson and Octavian were spotted behind the dumpster across the street. Not knowing they were being seen, they stripped their clothing off and began drawing murals on each others bodies with paint. Confused I then remember hearing about the Schroom fields out in Chicago. Makes perfect sense.

* Feb. 23rd 20:23 - Yuri began.... Insert creepy orchestra music here

* Feb. 23rd 03:33 - Carl_Jones thought it would be better to be on top... Until he got up there and realized he was actually afraid of heights. Poor Carl.

* Feb. 22nd 18:33 - Altidore was spotted returning home from vacation, only to see that his house had been raided and his fetish collection had been put on display at a local Catholic Church. He's now devoted his faith to Buddhism.

* Feb. 6th 18:40 - Lonerforareason found a friend for a day, but once the cops found there "Mannequin Wrangler" he became lonely once again.

* Feb. 22nd 12:45 - Stranger was seen attempting to be known. I'm serious! Don't believe me go ask them yourself!

* Feb. 12th 14:30 - CaptainBubbleBeard ran naked in front my my doors hollering how he had to find soap and water fast. Someone needs to tell that man how silly he looks with that shit on his face.

* Feb. 16th 01:14 - Datsik was seen giving a hand job to a homeless man outside my office. When asked why in god's name he's do such a thing, he simply replied with, "Well Sir, I thought you said I had show my respect to the elderly?" Well I have to give him credit where it's due I suppose.

* Feb. 17th 04:20 - I watched myself get high in the mirror. It was 420 what do you expect?

* Feb. 20th 12:23 - Kes was seen chasing Felix the cat through the streets. Someone over heard him screaming that he'd been needing pussy ever since they had departed from Vegas. Deprivation drives people to do some crazy things sometimes.

"So you see. Even when I haven't been around, I still see all. I could go on and on with some of the antics I witnessed people doing, and yes some worse then the time Pumpkin got spotted being eaten by SINGER. If you only knew...."

Wad hits the blunt again and shakes his head in a manner that could only be taken as an attempt to release horrid images.

"Yes that bad. On a brighter note though, with this I declare myself out of hiding within my bakery limits and back to the streets doing what I do best. Delivering hard Dick."

Dick hit's his blunt one last time before stomping it out beneath his foot.

Datsik was casually walking through the streets when he heard the mans speech and had to do a double take.

I can neither confirm nor deny these observations. Although I know for a fact the man was not homeless.

Some fine observations here Sir, some things the average Dick wouldn't see. Its good to have you back on these streets, your powerful yet sensual voice drowns out some of the other "rif raf" on their soap boxes.

Datsik stands by Dick to make more observations.

Richard you promised you would never tell anyone about my love for the pumpkin.

SINGER smiles.

Well i am glad to see you back on the streets, I had almost come to the conclusion that you have abandoned all of us.

Kikashi appears from behind Dick shaking a polaroid

*Feb. 23rd 22:35 RichardWad is distracted by the moth attacking a lamp and fails to realise he's sticking up a gas station.

Inferno is stunned at the latest shouts he hears coming form outside of his apartment building so he takes a step outside.

He remembers to take his bat, just in case there is trouble. He has to take a triple take to finally absorb wjhat this insane man is saying with out finally realizing this humble gentlemen's words. He aplauds the love speech and briskly returns to his apartment.

Ummmm. Where do I come into this? And I don't get the 'creepy orchestra music'...?

Oh I get it now. Lol. Sorry.

Yes, I began.......  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vQVealIHWWck

She approaches Dick from behind and places a ball in his hand as she leans in close to his ear and whispers in a deep and husky voice...

Looks like you're playing catcher tonight darling.... It is true that Octavian and I are close, but not as close as you seem to think. That wasn't me he was with, that was my most loyal decoy Corde.

Her lips curl into a smile as she walks to face Dick face on.

Octavian is my son. My spawn. Not my poolboy.

She flashes a smile.

But that position is available if you are ever bored of your life of crime.

She winks and saunters off down the Street looking for a good bakery.

Oh Trcky Dicky...you do see some weird and wonderfull things...

I would like to note tho, if Tony allowed us to bring our hookers on our travels I wouldnt have to chase around the only pussy available....to be honest, he likes playing hard to get