The Star-Examiner's editor, SamAdams, steps on to an overturned crate and begins speaking:

Hello everyone! Firstly, happy Easter! I hope you have a wonderful and blessed day.

I have two things to say, I'll keep them brief. First, our paper will soon move from its' current HQ in Las Vegas to a new office in Detroit. It will not affect the paper in any way.

Second, I'm very happy to announce my new employee, AntoOC! He will be taking care of the printing press from here on out. I can't wait to share his wonderful work with you in our next issue, which will come out in the next couple days!

That's all for now, have a great day! And remember to send in those tips and gossip!