Anton is, once again, thinking about Billy_Russo.  There must be, he muses, a way out of this impasse.  But suddenly, he thought that thinking was for the silly ones, and that the motivated ones use like, inspiration and what their mind sends. Now it was jazz music that came into his mind. There was a window open with the music playing, and he realised right at once what to do...

"For too long, too many of you have had to bear witness to the Anton/Billy feud.  We are, it is clear, two totemic presences on the Streets.  Does anyone here disagree?

The crowd is stony silent

I have therefore asked the honourable Judge_Topperson to preside over a judgement.

I, Anton, charge that Billy_Russo is unreasonable in declining my offer of friendship.

How does he plead? 

After presiding the case of PoisonIvy versus Ronnie-Radke, Judge_Topperson felt like retiring. The case had been way more profitable than he expected it to be, upon entering a small gathering of what seemed like a simple Street Pageant Contest.

Now, the cards were totally different, he was asked to judge a dispute that seemingly had gone on for generations. And Judge_Topperson felt like his retirement could get a new standard of living if he accepted to judge this one. But he wouldn't show. He decided to appear annoyed and hard-to-bribe, which, of course, he wasn't..

Hi

Topperson slashed his hammer against Anton's soapbox, as he felt he needed to somehow make the case official. He had forgotten the formal words to say to start a hearing.. or meeting.. or whatever those proper honest judges called them..

So.. We have what seems to be a simple case here.. On.. Friendship..?

Judge_Topperson frowned and whispered

Anton, there must be a mistake here..
You accidentally said you offered Billy_Russo friendship..

Realizing that objecting against the content of papers handed in possibly was of little favour to his own bank account, Judge_Topperson decided to ignore the error and proceed..

All right.. maybe you both can just toss in some arguments and stuff.. Mainly. because if you don't, and I do make a verdict, I might get in trouble with the Board of Judges all over again..

He thought back of the Foamy versus Rowley case, the so-called nutcase, where the official evidence was just a copy of money transfers listed onto the judge's account. He really disliked the paperwork that his profession brought, but then again.. it wasn't as bad as Ethel_Scroggins's embroidery work or Rowley's jokes in Grin-08's HQ..

I am sure the both of you can do some please and send me bribes, so we can get this thing going, all right?

Billy_Russo, do you have anything to say on the matter?

Well, Judge_Topperson, the list of charges I could make against Billy_Russo are extensive, and I must refer to my extended family and bloodline.  I will start:

Accusations of sexual harassment.  I demand a retraction, and an apology.

Accusations of rigging writing contests.  I enter a special defence of entrapment, I demand a retraction and an apology.

Accusations of "not being a good person."  I demand evidence that satisfies you, Judge_Topperson, and the jury.

Furthermore, I accuse Billy_Russo of plagiarism.  He stole my writing contest ideas.

May I call witnesses?  

Foamy, clattering away on his typewriter records the transcript for the record.

Foamy then realises, he neither owns a typewriter nor, with the absence of opposable thumbs, can type

Foamy realises he's been tapping away at a packet of gummy bears

Foamy walks off in disgrace.