Let me preface this announcement by saying that my only ambition in life was to coach / star on the Chicago Boston Celtics, my professional basketball team and part-time mafia gang. I do not want the responsibility of Street leadership. In fact, I find much of what goes on here very tedious and boring. Did you hear that SpikeS speech the other day? Imagine dragging out an exceedingly simple analogy for 16 paragraphs. Cattle, sub-cattle, cattle-leaders, unbelievable. Was there a bill being filibustered? Get a hold of yourself. 

Following the death of Anton, there is a void in street leadership. As the leader of the mafia, it seems only right that I step in and stand as acting Leader of the Streets until such a date when democratic elections can be run (this, of course, at my discretion). I have considered the options but it is clear that it now falls to me, as the most powerful man in the world today, to act as the arbiter of good content. 

Let me make this clear: I will be keeping a watchful eye on the quality and moral standard of all future Street participation, as that is what is needed in this day and age. Someone has to keep you fat babies from reaching your sausage-fingered paws out towards the low-effort ether and pulling out whatever drivel it is you would like to speak about today. My rulings will be delivered in various ways, most commonly via immediate response to your speeches. 

My first act as LOTS is to knight MG-PPR, who becomes Sir MG-PPR of The Streets, for his contributions towards running a poll declaring myself best of the crewleaders with names that start with C.