Stepping out onto a podium, he noticed a few of his close friends....the man himself, Ron_Swanson. The King of Threes, Sync. That was a fucking lie in itself, and he wasn't even going to correct his thoughts on it. There was a few others like Ryman_Branson who had an uncanny resemblance to a Colombian drug cartel boss. Maybe an agency should check him out on that....

Then there was many like Zek who stood there watching him after his speech earlier in the day, his former business partner and now apparently rival!? What the fuck was going on, but either way, he moved on and would continue doing so as he watched his friends, allies, enemies, and strange acquaintances that he had the occasional talk with. 

"Ladies, Gentlemen, Zek, and all you other tea loving assholes. Coffee is King but that is not why I am not out here today. I am here because I have been accused and truly hurt by the accusations of one...fucked up person (I guess....) by the name of Zek. He has accused me of having a dalliance with several waitresses, snorting powdered doughnuts and then apparently I have a problem with the little thing called water or as he called it, heroin!"

Looking around he noticed a few of his former allies from the basketball team, deciding that this was a great time to shout out his former team, the CBC and their once coach, Cromwell. Who was still having a run in with the law, shrugging, he looked at each of them and noticed Cognito, that man was always hiding somewhere...then there was well, a few others he couldn't recognize at the time, and he decided to bow his head to the team. 

"One more thing before we truly move into the thick of things. In this room currently is one man who deserves to be in the GOAT discussion and then four others who are more than deserving. It is I and the Chicago Boston Celtics! GIVE US A ROUND OF APPLAUSE!"

Now there was suddenly a question if he was snorting more than powdered doughnuts. Rom did know that it was Ron who had won them the third, fourth, and fifth ring, right? While he had only won them two times. It was truly clear who the GOAT was here but it seemed like his former teammates would be letting it go due to his recent brush with death...

"Back onto the scandalous accusations of one Zek or multiple Zek's who seem to have a little capitalization in their names. That does not matter here, right now, what matters is that one of the greatest minds in basketball and in the coaching areas of the league is being questioned on his reported dalliances with waitresses. I am here to set the record straight, to nip it in the bud if it were..."

Clearing his throat, he once again looked out to all the eyes out there. Some disgusted and others beyond confused, to be honest, so was he but it did not matter. He was here to defend his honour, though according to some, there was never anything of the sort. 

"Listen to me now ladies and gentlemen. I. Did. Not. Sleep. With. Any. Waitresses! BECAUSE, I was up all night... I kid, I kid. Mostly. The waitress part is true, though I did not pay her $1500, she came because of my charm and Zek, being the jealous man he is as he said so much in his speech to all this early morning. He could not handle the fact that I charmed women and I had a foreseeable plan in mind to begin my supposed...betting syndicate."

Chancing a nervous glance at the few patrol men walking the area, he simply waved at them and looked at the gathered crowd of people. 

"I will now take questions from the crowd and of course, to those who love Coffee like myself and Cassiopeia. You can join Coffee's anonymous, and we can dish. Please, we welcome the questions now...."

Ron notices his late friends progeny, Rom, and stops by to listen.

You don't have to explain yourself son, you acted like a man and i'm proud of you.