Just to understand this properly. Your basically asking us to 'coach' someone on how to go thru a daily MR regiment?

That's how I read it.

Gotcha. So a motivational speaker is what your asking for. But tailored to MR? 

There was only so long I could listen to my own voice, so this is as good as it gets from me. I had to pull out my customer service voice which is still very un-motivational.

Also, Upper Structure callout.

https://voca.ro/168K98gam7g3

Transcript for those that don't speak dull, deep British.

Thank you for choosing "Introduction to Mafia Returns - Hardcore edition". Today we're going to cut through your first 2 minutes.

Let's get started!

Going to start off relatively easy with finding some work so let's go to Profit > Find Work

Let's do one of those jobs. We're going to get a few reps of these in, so while we wait let's follow the tutorial as it's going to give us some pot.

Great! Now, it's going to start to heat up. Follow the tutorial to sell, buy shrooms and sell again.

One more time guys, find something worth buying and stock up, now let's go to actions menu and then Jail. Hit one of those Bust Out buttons. 

Left hand side of the screen, it's voting time. Push yourself now you can get two of those done before the next jail and 3, 2, 1 and Jail.

Back to your votes I want another two gone. Hit those plus symbols, drop the capture and 3, 2, 1, hit that find work again and 2, 1 and Jail

Finish off those votes now push through them, then it's over to the Hustle icon, take note of what you've got to complete, and then it's back to Actions, and 2 and 1, JAIL

Back to find work again and now keep watch for your mail icon to flash. Meanwhile we're going to check the achievements page to see what you've unlocked so far as these will give you some great starting benefits. Let's not stop driving we're going back to Actions and 3, 2 , 1 JAIL, 

OK to profit and check those drug prices. Watch that travel timer. Let's check that mail we've received now and ready,  3, 2, 1, Jail

Hit find work again and now head to info. This is where we're going to get an idea if the crew is right for you.  Check out their info and activity them get ready for our actions page again 3, 2, 1 Jail. 

Doing great now guys almost at the 2 minute mark you've got 20 seconds to begin your response to the sponsor that's mailed you so get that started. Keep an eye on your Jail timer 3, 2, 1 Jail

Your travel timer will be open again soon, get ready to hit that then straight to you profit > drugs menu to sell what you've got and 2, 1, JAIL.

And that's your first 2 minutes of MR. You are on the path to hardcore with insanely active status. Tune in for the next lesson where we'll be moving onto 750 jails a day and I want to see 27 kills on that gun. Until then, stay safe.

And Outtakes. Yay!

https://voca.ro/11LzEFrJmvrG

https://voca.ro/1aTF3qixfiCw

https://voca.ro/1gHmCyUMIue1

https://voca.ro/1kALVC00ltmh

I’m impressed at how many words JackMezzo can get through in that time window. Mine is considerably slower, more spaced out and less demanding, but done in a similar vein... and I still managed to stumble over my words a couple of times.

Shameless upper structure entry

Be kind with your criticisms, and good luck with the accent cos, unlike Jack, I haven’t typed up a transcript :P

Cinnamon bloody brilliant mate! 😂😂

I honestly thought you were going to end it on "shit missed the durden!" And then cut it off...

Ahahahahah 'fucking iphone'!!!

My work phone, Papua, got an irrational hate of it anyway, so it wasn't helping itself!

https://voca.ro/1mGUUf3cDxdU

I'll follow Jack's example and put down my script too, probs some words didn't go through as smooth as i thought!! :p

Alright listen up you fools,

that’s right, if you wanna be fucking bad ass you came tot he right place

this tutorial is to get you all - into bad, ass shape

until you hang with a crew -- you gotta put up the legwork yourself

that means get off that lazy ass … - what do you mean you got the game open on 1 one tab only?

this game is not a 1 action thing, now get your shit together

when you got your sorry ass fresh off the boat, you were already whining about being hungry and thirsty

well until you do something fucking useful, it ain’t gonna change

so stop being a weakling and quit those jobs, go do some bitch ass crimes, say what now, every 3 minutes, nah man every second counts, steal that purse at least 1 secs before that timer beeps

jailing every 20 seconds, fuck no, it can be done in 16 and if you were not fully useless and bought that perk - -  you do it twice before that timer beeps and you got 2 busts before some loser that didn’t listen to this workout even tried

switch tabs, you got a felony to do, switch again look at the crew pages

You find the crew you want, you are bad ass, you are fucking gangsta, let them know you’re kick ass and deserve that spot!

Fool, you just missed another jailbust, go go, switch to that tab

you don’t know where you left it, you damned fool, you should organize those tabs, left to right, shortest to longest timer

1,2,3, Jail, 1,2,3, 4 (fuck too slow) do that crime

wait…. no way…. you didn’t do any training range yet,  

Fool you got 50k, it doesn’t cost that much, get your ass shooting before some motherfucker who actually put some damn effort in comes and pop your ass!!!

JackMezzo weirdly enough that was incredibly motivating!  Izzy this is GREAT!

Okay, I gotta do this ... lol!

https://voca.ro/17VBQiK6wgBS

So I did a thing and thats what matters: https://voca.ro/1h9yR7TinyXr

I also didn't listen to it so who the fuck knows what it sounds like. 

Script: 

Right, well you found your way here but before we get started we have some questions that we need to go over before we let you out into the world.

Question one: Are you an idiot? No no, please be completely honest.

Question Two: Do you need a healthy sleep schedule to survive?

Question Three: Do you respect the art of DIBS?

Well, alright. I guess we can get started, I mean Im not the most motivational person there is, but luckily a lot of this is just sitting and I’m basically the queen of that. Right so theres a blue arrow on your screen right? And its going “Crime for me, Crime hard for me baby!” And what do we say to the blue arrow? NOT TODAY. Ignore that, we’re gonna focus on whats truly important. Scroll down, nah keep scrolling, nope keep going. Yeah these Admin announcements are long as fuck aren’t they, absurd. Right you at the bottom now, yah?

This is the 60 second list, which is the most important thing in this game because ALL OF THESE PEOPLE CAN BE MAILED. And if you’re an attention seeking piece of shit like me, you’re gonna mail them all, repeatedly, forever. Even if they don’t mail you back.

Now back up to the top, see where it says “Comm”? Yeah well its time for our DREAMS, ahem, Your dreams to come true! Head to the Business district and type out your wildest fantasy. Whats that? You want to be able to afford healthcare and property? You want to be tall, thin and wear high heels for longer than 5 minutes before you’re crippled? You want to be a god damn squirrel? Well, you can. The sky is the limit, and also the 1920s. But still, you can say Fuck A LOT and you can’t do that shit on Neopets.. no you can not.
NOW. You’ve made new friends, you’ve told everyone about your fantastic outfit and amazing hair. Whats next you ask? Well… if things have gone according to plan there should be an envelope flashing on the left side of the screen. See that? Yeah? CLICK IT AND RESPOND.

That’s it, that’s the game. GOOD LUCK, BUDDY!

Please be advised that mailing Helpdesk asking if they prefer cats or dogs does result in an admin ban for a week. Also do not commit sock fraud or try to murder the player base with the highly contagious Jenbola. Thank you.

I did the thing... and I'm a CL! :D

https://voca.ro/1iXpH4pTTUYP

Also, Damn you Izzy for subjecting me to the sound of my own voice XD

https://voca.ro/1nCz1C6r9pVm

Stright from the Streets of New York.

A Thomas Crown Production. 

Mafia Motivation...lets get it. 

Petty, Jails and Felonies. Petty, Jails and Felonies. 

So what do you think this is....a game? 

Get clicking, do your petties, knock off those felonies. Get some OC's up in here...get that money raining. 

Dripping like Ms Rains suit. 

Put some fingers into it. Get those jails, like Mezzo. 

Dont stop now. You think this is easy? You think this is fun? 

I mean maybe...when your done. But the grind isnt. 

No one loves the GRIND. I mean shit....just look at that bad boy Gunter over there. 

Guy was IA as they come. He woke up, put his ass into it....or more like his thumbs. 

And boom, hes looking at GF as his next promo.

Petty, Jails and Felonies. Petty, Jails and Felonies. 

You know how hard that is for a older account to do that? 

But lets not talk about old men. Lets talk about the young smashers. 

Look at Smash. Just literally smashing the crap out of those buttons. 

Petty, Felony, OC, Drug Runs...Roguettes, Rogues and Durds.

Petty, Jails and Felonies. Petty, Jails and Felonies. 

This aint easy..

This requires work, sweat and sometimes tears.

Petty, Jails and Felonies. Petty, Jails and Felonies. 

Nothing comes easy. Nothing comes without time and persistence. 

But here we are, all dreamers. Clicking for glory. 

Petty, Jails and Felonies. Petty, Jails and Felonies. 

As someone famous once said. Im just like my country, young hungry and scrappy. 

And I'm not throwing away my SHOT!

Ooops. Were not suppose to talk about that in public...

Get back to clicking young thugs. 

Petty, Jails and Felonies. Petty, Jails and Felonies. 

From the Streets of NY

Omerta Baby!!!

https://voca.ro/1nCz1C6r9pVm

Well, first time using Vocaroo. Can't say that I enjoyed hearing my own voice but it's all in fun. Music is from my phone, sorry if it didn't sound all that great. 

Here is my submission. I'd also like to add that I'm an upper.

Happy listening! :P

https://voca.ro/1dA1iEpoW3Ay

These are all great!

It never occurred to me that Mezzo would be pronounced Mee-zo. I always heard it in my head as Meh-zo.

So now I can't stop thinking about it, thanks, Mr. Crown. 

I really tried to hone in on the energy of a failed Peloton Instructor that lost everything and came to MR to make it big... but lost it all over again. This competition was a really dark road for me.

This competition is funny as hell. I love it. Gunther and ThomasCrown's were hilarious!!! Good shit guys