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| Herald of the Underworld: Vol 2, issue 3 | Started by: Monroe on Dec 13, '22 14:20 |
ℍ𝔼ℝ𝔸𝕃𝔻 𝕠𝕗 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕌ℕ𝔻𝔼ℝ𝕎𝕆ℝ𝕃𝔻finding newsworthy stories in quiet times
USA • Tuesday, December 13th• Vol 2, No. 3
Is LiquidFareham actually Kuku?
Debate rages over whether, or not, LiquidFareham is in fact of the Kuku lineage. Holding firm the mantle of John Fareham Memorial, speculation has mounted over whether LF is Kuku. Let's look at the rumours. Kuku is a master of deception, often hiding in plain sight as he manipulates and motivates those around him to do his bidding. LF has undoubted range and reach. So far, so Kuku. Kuku is something of a wisecracking smartass. LF has been known to crack jokes and mock those who contact him. So far, so Kuku. But there is one compelling piece of evidence that suggest that LF is NOT kuku. It is this. The Streets are quiet. Could Kuku stand the Streets being quiet, and leaderless, for this long? We think not. What do YOU think? Is LF Kuku? Rufio is possibly descended from LostBoy!
Rufio, we have been told, is a descendent of LostBoy. LostBoy was murdered in cold blood by Chris_Vaughn's grandfather for stealing writing competition prize money. Since then, dozens of people have been killed with their last words being the words Lost Boy. Have YOU had a relative who was killed in a LostBoy related murder? Please let us know!
LeftAlone rocked by a Double Suicide!
Yesterday, jdjd and Huey killed themselves. Speculation has mounted as to why this happened, with some pointing the finger at a prominent member of LeftAlone's crew who owns a stable of businesses and police stations across this thing of ours. Did YOUR father shoot himself to get out of conversing with a terrible business owner? Please let us know!
That's All For Issue III!! Please Leave me Money and Tips!! |
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What do I think? I think I am SICK and TIRED of constantly being called Kuku. I am not Kuku, I am Fareham, of the famed Fareham lineage, perhaps best known for an ancestor who died for a joke told by FourMenInSuits, sending Constipated into a state of violent mania eventually leading to the world being thrown into CHAOS.
I AM NOT KUKU
Do we have common ancestry due to an unfortunate incestuous mishap in the family? Yes.
The reason for my being quiet as of late is because I've been a busy boy.
My Crew Leader (and conductor) FrenchieHorn has had me rigorously train to improve my skills at the triangle (the instrument I was assigned in The John Fareham Memorial All-Star Band and personally take great pride in playing). If I even play one note out-of-tune I get reprimanded for the rest of the evening, and am sent to my living quarters without my JFMAB-regulated performance-enhancing supper. Playing well is a matter of life and death.
Now who is the real Kuku?
As of recent I've spotted a mysterious figure stalking the streets. This figure is SolidFareham. I think he fits the profile you outlined perfectly. He's even pretending to be me, Fareham, that rascal. I suggest we dress someone in a FatherMacklePenny disguise as live-bait to prove my hypothesis. Perhaps AssChicken will volunteer? |
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| Reply by: LiquidFareham at Dec 13, '22 22:22 | |
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After waiting for a long, long, long time, a new issue of the " Herald " has been published. The moment Hiro heard about it, he dropped everything and rushed himself downtown, to his favorite newsstand to get a copy. |
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| Reply by: Hiro_Nakamura at Dec 15, '22 02:16 | |
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Premmywise is against journalists |
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| Reply by: Journalist at Dec 15, '22 13:53 | |
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I am pro free speech and think journalist do a great job, you however I think you do a shit job reporting facts |
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| Reply by: Premmywise at Dec 15, '22 18:22 | |
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Premmywise - I'm literally the only journalist alive.
So what do you mean? |
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| Reply by: Journalist at Dec 15, '22 20:59 | |
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Seems like some think its fun to act like kuku to fool the most but dont fool all luckily. Great issue to read in a way but so far not the best issue though. Keep up the good work! |
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| Reply by: Tutte at Dec 15, '22 21:04 | |
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