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They come in all shapes and sizes Started by: Parallelogram on Jan 05, '23 12:06

Parallelogram was not always known by that name. In fact, he was born with a much more ordinary name: Emilio. It was not until he was in high school that he earned the nickname "Parallelogram," and it was a nickname that would stick with him for the rest of his life.

It all started one day in math class, when Emilio's teacher was trying to explain the concept of a parallelogram. Despite his best efforts, Emilio just could not seem to grasp the idea. No matter how many times the teacher tried to explain it, the concept just seemed to slip through his fingers like sand. As Emilio struggled to understand, his classmates began to snicker and joke about his inability to grasp the concept. And before he knew it, someone had shouted out the nickname "Parallelogram," and it had stuck.

At first, Emilio was embarrassed and humiliated by the nickname. He hated being the subject of ridicule and mockery, and he wished more than anything that he could just disappear. But as time passed, Emilio began to embrace his nickname. He realized that it was a part of who he was, and he learned to take it in stride. As he grew older and began to explore the world of the Mafia, he found that his nickname helped to set him apart and to make him memorable.

In the end, it was his nickname that actually led him to join the Mafia. He had always been drawn to the sense of power and purpose that the organization offered, and he knew that he could make a difference as a member, specifically because of his rudimentary knowledge of geometry.

And so, with a sense of determination and resolve, he set out on a journey that would change his life forever. He began to navigate the complex and often dangerous world of the Mafia, finding himself constantly on the lookout for new opportunities and challenges. He was eager to prove himself and to make a name within the organization, and he knew that he had to be smart and resourceful if he was going to succeed.

It was during this time that he approached FrenchieHorn, a powerful and influential lady boss, who was known for her affection for the French horn. FrenchieHorn had heard of Parallelogram and his interesting nickname, and she was intrigued by his potential.

"I've been watching you, Parallelogram," FrenchieHorn said, her voice thick and distorted due to her engorged French horn blowing lips colliding into each other whenever she spoke. "I think you have what it takes to be a member of The Band. Are you interested?"

Without hesitation, Parallelogram agreed. He knew that this was a rare and potentially valuable opportunity, and he was determined to make the most of it. With FrenchieHorn as his mentor and guide, Parallelogram began his journey as a member of The Band. He trained hard and dedicated himself to the cause, and he quickly proved to be a valuable and reliable member of the team gaining 18 units in 30 days.

Parallelogram rose through the ranks of The Band, earning respect and admiration from his peers and superiors even becoming an Earner after just 20 days. Even as he faced challenges and setbacks, he never lost sight of his goals and his determination to succeed. In the end, it was this combination of hard work and dedication that helped Parallelogram to achieve his dreams and to become a true success within the Mafia.

They changed the locks on The Band HQ and a note on the door said he had been transferred to Sandor, who never spoke to him and died shortly afterwards. 

Parallelogram looked around the street, his memory of those events were still so vivid they felt like only days ok.

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As a mobster, Parallelogram had always been used to keeping himself entertained. He had always been a creative and resourceful person, and he knew how to make the most of every situation.

So when he found himself unceremoniously dumped upon Sandor, a barely seen and lazy boss by all accounts, Parallelogram knew that he would have to find ways to keep himself busy. He began by exploring his new surroundings and getting to know the other members of the crew. He made friends and allies wherever he could, which was unfortunately nowhere, but he still worked hard to earn the respect and trust of his peers. He steadily rose to 21 units. 

This reminded him of a time during his tenure with "The Band" where all members had their ability to sell drugs hindered by the Gods. They were maxed at 20 units. Fortunately, Parallelogram was clever enough to not have earned the clout to trade at that level and was therefore not disadvantaged at all. It was quite a cunning scheme and he was proud of himself for not actually being worthwhile to punish. 

Although he remained optimistic about his prospects, this was a dark time in the depths of Sandorville which was a murky pit of shame and absenteeism. You might think that would present the perfect home for someone like Parallelogram, a geometry struggler without a good work ethic. It was the opposite and he struggled.

In his downtime, Parallelogram kept himself entertained by reading, writing, and practicing his craft. He was a talented musician, and he spent hours each day honing his skills on his guitar. He also enjoyed painting and drawing, and he spent many hours lost in the creative process. He knew that he had a lot to offer the world, and he was determined to make the most of every opportunity that came his way. And even as he worked hard and played hard, he knew that he was living his dream and that he was exactly where he was meant to be.

Luckily for him, Sandor was killed and a new opportunity would present itself. 

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Yes, Parallelogram, I too am nostalgic for the glory days of The John Fareham Memorial All-star Band. I can still vividly remember our band practice sessions led by our excellent conductor Frenchiehorn, and how masterfully you played the trombone.

GuybrushThreepwood's performances with the theremin were also truly a sight to behold (or to hear?). I can only hope he will be reimbursed the $17 as his instrument got caught up in the explosion which wiped out our HQ.

To be frank I never had high hopes for Sandor, his prowess at playing the violin was poor and he frequently struck a false note. He did not know how to keep rhythm either and perhaps unsurprisingly I did not see him at the private Systematic Immolation of Thought studygroup I ran in the HQ either.


ON TO THE PRESENT DAY


A new crew has moved into Manhattan under the leadership of Leftalone, but the inhabitants of Manhattan are sorely missing the harmonious music that used to fill its streets. Instead we got hermits.

I am hereby publicly requesting Leftalone to change the name of his crew to "The John Fareham Memorial All-star Band 2", and to have all his members start learning an instrument immediately. I would also like to personally recommend the xylophone for JamesBaxter.

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While I appreciate your recommendation, LiquidFareham, I must respectfully decline. I’ve no interest in being a musical artist or a member of your band. Best of luck in your ventures, though.

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Parallelogram was in the middle of recalling his time in FrenchieHorn's crew, his transition to Sandor and the immediate aftermath, when LiquidFareham interrupted him. The crux of what he was saying was that he didn't have high hopes for Sandor either. Parallelogram agreed.

LiquidFareham then went on to mention that he was trying to start another All-star Band within Leftalone's crew, but Parallelogram was not interested. He had just settled into a new family and he didn't want to start over again with another group, even if they would probably recognise his prowess with the trombone and guitar. LiquidFareham tried to involve JamesBaxter in the discussion, but JamesBaxter was not interested in joining in. Parallelogram understood JamesBaxter's perspective and didn't think he should become embroiled in it either.

Parallelogram was polite but firm as he too declined involvement with LiquidFareham's request for Leftalone to rename his crew. "I appreciate the thinking LiquidFareham, but I'm happy where I am and Lefalone's crew is probably greatly named already," he said. 

LiquidFareham looked disappointed but nodded understandingly. Parallelogram assured him that his mind is set, and that he doesn't want any trouble. He just wanted to keep working hard for his boss Marcus_Aurelius, and focus on building a strong and successful crew under his leadership. He didn't think he needed to remind LiquidFareham that Marcus_Aurelius and he are well respected figures in the community, and he does not want to tarnish that reputation by getting caught up in any trouble or drama.

"I just want to keep working hard and doing my part to make sure that we're successful."

LiquidFareham nodded, respecting Parallelogram's choice and understanding his loyalty. They parted ways cordially, and Parallelogram went back to his thoughts, remaining determined to prove his worth to Marcus_Aurelius and the crew he has chosen to be part of.

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