Dearest Mr Kuku,

I do believe you stumbled across my great grandfathers dubloon collection, shiny little credits. You see they meant a lot to the old bastard and I really do feel that they should be returned, right this instance,

Listen, I am a kind hearted man, with strong beliefs, morals, and a hint of class. I am willing to accept a formal apology when you get a moment and to be kind you can even keep a few sheckles for yourself.

I must also add that you should not listen to the likes of DaDip who, well lets face it, is probably off crawling around the alleys checking bins for food, I hope you see the error in your ways and respond in a timely manner.

With love,

Your Fenton.

Fenton. 

Fenton. 

FENTON. 

FEEEEEEEEEEEENTON. 

FENNNNNNNNNNNTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOn. 

FENTON. 

Jesus Christ. 

FENTON. 

FEEEEEEEEEEEENTON. 

A woman runs back and forth on the streets, desperate to get control of the situation. 

Fenton was not only known for his good looks, but boy did he know how to run. You see Fenton had been running from a young age, but nobody could seem to catch or keep him under control. He heard shouting that he had heard many times before, the classic ringing in his ears when people shout his name, it excited him if anything a little to much, there was no stopping him now.

"I will not settle until this grave injustice is rectified"

In shock DaDip looks at Fenton. He can't believe what he just heard.

How dare you talk about your own mother that way. She always gives me great meals. But I wouldn't call her an alley. Maybe like a large gap between buildings. Plus my advice is always amazing why you think you weren't broke yesterday for a second.

Gives Fenton's bitch ass the middle finger and walks away laughing.

"Well now that's fighting talk sir, one does not speak of one's mother that way, how uncouth of you. Oh now that's classy the middle finger, hey check this out, let's double down."

Fenton waves his hands infront of his face, hides them behind his back then slowly reviews one middle finger, he makes a sound. "badoing, oh wait where's your friend" he says as he reveals a second middle finger.

"Boom, How do you like those apples?"

He lets out a little smirk.

With a half-assed sigh of true exasperation Rebecca started chasing, because god damn what the fuck Fenton. 

FENTON

FEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNTOOOOOOOOOOOOn

GOD DAMN IT

FENTON

FE-EH-EH-NEH-TON

FENTON. 

GOD DAMN IT

GET BACK HERE FENTON. 

Looking on confused as fuck. Like DaDip has friends.

"This stupid fucker." he thinks to himself.

I mean the only reason i was showing you my middle finger was to remind you of your mother. I mean smell it.

DaDip reaches his middle finger towards Fenton's face.

It smells like her right? 

Rebecca stops running for a second, just because the joke was there and it needed to be taken much like her dear friend Dadip 's mom late at night when there are no other options. 

"Just to confirm you've now publically stated that the only way you can please a woman is with your longest finger, which implies..." She trails of, letting those smart enough around her to figure out that DaDip just said his dick was smaller than his finger. 

Looks around and whispers to Rebecca. Then says,

"Well yea cause my longest finger bigger than my dick"

Rebecca nodded her head, knowingly. "Yes, thats why she came to me, and for me, isn't it." 

Have you malfunctioned, LonelyWolf? 

"I believe everybody deserves the right to both send and receive an open letter, whether they live long enough to reply, well that's not something I cannot control. I am but a mere peasant amongst men.

Such a shame to see lives lost over, well, who knows what it was over."

In the corner of his eye he could see some back and forth between Rebecca and DaDip. He heckles in their direction.

"Get a room!"

I have been to Norway on a number of occasion, LonelyWolf.