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| The Time I Was Sick: A 47 Adventure | Started by: Mr_47 on Apr 28, '08 10:36 |
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*Cough, cough* I was hacking up my damn lungs. *Cough, cough* Friggin' Saint and his damn Cuban cigars, I bet. *Achoo!* Son of a bitch, who was I kidding. I was sick. It could be worse, I suppose. Catastrophe was down with a bout of some sort of VD. They were right, penicillin was a miricle drug. Too bad for him, they don't freely administer the stuff to hookers. *Cough, cough* Damn, when I laughed, it made me cough more. Illness be damned, I had an organization to run. I was in the middle of another coughing fit when a brick flew through my window. The glass shattered, I whirled around and shot the brick twice before it hit the ground. I WAS sick. Normally, I would have hit it at least three times. Regardless, my quickness on the draw shattered the brick, scattering pieces of orange shrapnel around my office. One piece sratched my face. Another embedded in my desk. Millions of others landed on the carpet and stuck in the wall, or in the spines of books. Amidst the remains, there was a paper note. As I attempted to control my hacking, I read the slightly shredded note. "47: We have you dog. (Dog was scratched out.) Car. We have your car. Come get it." I didn't have a dog, to this day, I don't know whose dog they stole. But, they did have my car, I supposed. If this was a good natured joke, I was too sick and tired. If my car was damaged, someone was going to die. Repeatedly. I went to the garage, which was, of course, empty. In oil they had spilled on the floor, the words "April Fools!" Were written. I turned to hear my crew, laughing behind me. I holstered my guns and smiled. "You dumbasses, April Fools Day is the FIRST of April. Where's my car?" They stopped laughing and Red Narc pulled up in my car, beeping the horn. "Beep, beep." "Hey boss, how's it..." *Crunch" The rearview mirror crinkled as he brushed the side of the garage. My crew ran, I drew my guns, and Red Narc jumped out of the car and ran. I didn't shoot any of them that day, but I blame that on my sickness. If I had been well, people would have died. |
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Yeah, that one didn't go so well. Narc's never been much of a hand behind the wheel. But not all of us ran. Me, I just ducked behind Mayor McCheese. I've found he's pretty effective when used as a bullet proof vest. |
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| Reply by: Mr_Rogers_Lovechild at Apr 28, '08 11:15 | |
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As I sit here listening to this very intriguing story, one thought keeps occurring to me. What the heck happened to the dog? |
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| Reply by: Amber at Apr 28, '08 13:03 | |
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Montiego smiles at Amber "Don't you mean car?" |
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| Reply by: Montiego at Apr 28, '08 16:17 | |
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| Hey, I haven't had a case of VD in years. I just use the excuse to get out of actually doing work. Nobody wants to work with you when you head into the bathroom and scream as you go every so often. | |
| Reply by: Catastrophe at Apr 28, '08 18:48 | |
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| Um, the dog. Well, we had "Chinese Food Day" last week and he disappeared. I don't know what happened. We have these theme parties at the HQ, it's a good time. | |
| Reply by: Mr_47 at Apr 28, '08 19:38 | |
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| I thought it smelled like updog in here. | |
| Reply by: Dwight_Schrute at Apr 28, '08 22:59 | |
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Wait... What's up dog? Mr Roger's Lovechild looks around at everyone snickering. He hangs his head in shame. |
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| Reply by: Mr_Rogers_Lovechild at Apr 28, '08 23:06 | |
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Wait a minute. Didn't you guys invite Sammy and I over for "Chinese Food Day"? You said the chow mein was a little "ruff", but we just had to "woof" it down, and it would be alright. And I was quite certain I never heard of "Bow Wow Beef". Amber covers her mouth with her hand and runs for the bathroom. |
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| Reply by: Amber at Apr 28, '08 23:15 | |
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| Why is that so bad? It's a mammal, it's meat, why the taboo? It's a little gamey, but not as much as cat. | |
| Reply by: Mr_47 at Apr 28, '08 23:17 | |
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*Quits hanging up lost dog posters* Well that explains alot, I'll forever miss you my favorite pet. I can't help but think I should've named you something other than #34, maybe that's how that chinese restaurant found you. On a side note, Rogers; you can quit hiding now. I don't know why I'm constantly finding you in my shadows. |
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| Reply by: Mayor_McCheese at Apr 28, '08 23:59 | |
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The crew gave me a kitten a few weeks ago. She was a beautiful kitten, all soft and furry. I named her Fluffy. I loved playing with Fluffy, she was just a little ball of sunshine. She's been missing for about a week now. I loved that kitten. FLUUUUUUUUUUUUUUFFFY!!! Amber breaks down and cries. |
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| Reply by: Amber at Apr 29, '08 07:46 | |
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| We don't serve Fluffy here. However, Rogers was curious about a cat landing on its feet. From the top of the Sears Tower. Sorry. | |
| Reply by: Mr_47 at Apr 29, '08 10:22 | |
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