Big Sam strolled out into the streets. Breathing deeply of the evening air his senses were filled with romantic promise. It was that kind of night. It was that special night. And Sam was the man for a night like this. He strolled along whistling softly as he went, until he saw a downtrodden looking woman with a down turned face. Compelled into motion, Sam had to intervene. Stooping to meet her at eye level, Sam smiled, took one of her delicate hands in his massive paw and landed a deft kiss upon it. Seeing her smile he whispered private somethings softly into her ear and filled her with cheer. With a blush and a giggle her face was transformed and alight with bright smiling radiance. Sam doffed his hat, swept a bow and went along his way.

Thinking about the evening and the woman he found alone in it, his mind began to wander to all the other women of the world. Sam felt compelled to help the fairer sex and so he took stand in the local square and cleared his throat.

Ladies and Gentlemen, well, mainly ladies really...

He fluffed the magnificent ruffles in his ostentatious shirt and sent a mischievous grin at the gathering throngs.

Tonight is a special night. Its the most romantic night of the year and its ripe for the plucking. The very air we breathe is positively throbbing with anticipation. Sensual and seductive, the evening like a fine wine floods the senses and leaves the pallet wet with promise. On a night like this Big Sam is in his element. I am not just an intimidating sexual combatant. No, no. Big Sam is filled with tenderness too. I have a deft touch and dancing tongue and a slick-silver ability to make the special ladies in my life feel like the moon was placed in the heavens just for them.

Swooping down Sam swept up a young woman in a long flowing dress and twirled her around. His formidable frame twisting and turning her with effortless care. Sending her twirling, she unravelled along his arm until they stood holding hands at arm's length. Sam smiled and bowed.

I am here to help all you lonely ladies during this most auspicious time. I will see no beauty left alone. No one will feel left out. Big Sam will ensure you all go to the proverbial ball. Whether that be dancing the night away with an elegant waltz, a feisty foxtrot or tantalising tango, I will be that man. If you desire poetry and compliments then Big Sam's gravely voice with rumble sweet nothings into your soft ears until you're quivering and breathless. If your night is so sad that you just want to laugh then Sam will full it with laughter as we watch the hilarious follies of the world as it passes.

Releasing the young woman's hand she sat and he looked around at the gathered faces. Seeing all types, ranging from beautiful and fun filled to the downright grotesque and off putting, Sam braced himself, prepared to try and help them all. Catching the eye of one particularly beastly individual, he smiled just as broadly as ever.

And hey, if you just want to get smashed and shout obscenities, point at passers by and stumble home blind and blithering drunk, well I can do that too. Yes. I will be all things to all women on this one perfect night. So come one, come all, lets embrace the moonlight and fill our hearts with bliss.

Taking a seat at an evening cafe, Sam ordered a glass of rich merlot and prepared himself to be, everything.