I'm 6 days into life in New York and it has been wonderful so far. I haven't heard a single MERREEOOW in the crew bar, nobody has promoted me to LHM before promptly slaying me for recruiting the best damn posse in the business, and half the crew hasn't yet been butchered for lacking "facts", whatever they may be.

So whilst life is currently shaping up better for me than it did for my illustrious predecessor, I do have concerns. Not with my own crew, who have been welcoming and friendly, just at the state of things, really. I look around the Streets and I see, well, nothing. Certainly nothing positive, anyway. There is a guy giving weather reports for credits, FrankCastiglia looking for a new best friend and then just lots and lots of associates lying dead in the gutter. One was shot last night seemingly for breaking what was effectively a gagging order. People are queuing up to take potshots at the regime. Most of the leaders have given more "No W/S required" eulogies than they have street speeches. And Burgerhouse was Burgerhoused.

To me, this seems like a sad state of affairs. But, I'm not so arrogant as to assume that I have an understanding of what each crew or even each city is doing. Maybe your crew is doing something great and they just haven't been broadcasting it. Maybe you're having a wonderful time and positively thriving under the tutelage of X. I'm eager to hear these positive tales from around the country. Lets have some uplifting news for Valentine's Day rather than a call to arms.

Please share some non-privileged information about all the good things that are going on which we just can't see. Cheer us up. 

The late Otis was Burgerhoused quite abruptly last night. Very sad. You hate to see a Burgerhousing play out like that. My time in the Carrara Crew has been very positive. Lucy recruited me and sent me money for drugs. I love drugs. I'm on many of them right now. More than that, I'm currently in no position to be Burgerhoused and feel unlikely to be Burgerhoused any time in the short-term future. That's very reassuring. 

I get free head massages everyday. A foot massage would have been better but you take what you can get. I am trying to implement a rule called "No clothes must be worn at all times inside the HQ" but there are some people who don't like the idea. But the truth is they are just jealous of my perfect butt and are too scared to compete.

Other than that, it's pretty normal in here.`

Thank you for those superb contributions. My understanding of business across the country is coming on leaps and bounds. 

I now know that you can expect a fat wedge from Lucy to get you up and running in the Carrara Crew, which you're meant to use for drug deals but can also take them to prevent anticipatory worries about being Burgerhoused. You can also get big laughs in Vegas with DrPepper. Ha ha ha ha. Naked HQ. Good one.

I look around the Streets and I see, well, nothing. Certainly nothing positive, anyway.

You don’t???  Man. I’m assuming you got an F- in geography class FatGrin, because you’ve clearly never heard of a little city we like to call Chicago. 
 

Take my home city for example, coincidentally also called Chicago. The city responsible for coining the now-popular phrase “Burgerhoused” that is already becoming a nationwide sensation. Coined after my ex-sponsor @BobBurgerhouse, it’s in reference to not only slaying those that step out of line, but making sure the obituary pages reflect them as the lowest, crappiest rank one could be buried with. This method has since been emulated by others such as in the recent case of Otis. No need to rehash his sins, because quite frankly they were so heinous they make me sick to my stomach. It wasn’t his contributions to our streets that were positive, but the outcome. A staunch reminder to everyone else not to follow suite.  Godfather Space-to-the-pole would have been well within his rights to attend Otis’s funeral and give his corpse a piece of his mind, but instead demonstrated a great deal of class by simply choosing not to attend at all. Of course a funeral isn’t the streets, but it’s still a sign that things are looking up and positivity is being restored.

Furthermore, if I may pat myself on my own vampire back, our city recently announced the mafia’s first same-sex marriage to be taking place in our own business district at the world-famous Chicago Stadium between TylerDurden and his own LHM RobertPaulson. This is something previously unheard of in The Lord’s Year 193something, but a huge step in the right direction. Not only will it be historic, it’ll be a lot of fun and advantageous for others to attend, as the attendees will be showered with lavish gifts and prizes with some fun contests based on creativity. And yes, that little city I referenced earlier Chicago is responsible for that. 
 

So in closing, and to your point about the weather forecasts we have been receiving, all I see is clear skies in our future. Hopefully my response to your negative speech here ironically sheds even more positivity to our streets. I’d tell you to have a nice day FatGrin, but as you know, we vampires only come out at NIGHT. 
 

Bill have you seen all the deaths in Chicago of late? Perhaps its more aptly called The City of the Dead. Perhaps they got the curse from Detroit.  See a healthcare professional as soon as possible.

BillCorsica I think you for the nice words. However I really can not claim to be the perfect gentleman in this case. When I shot him, I did leave him a playful "No WS required" as the last thing he heard. 

I look around the Streets and I see, well, nothing. Certainly nothing positive, anyway. There is a guy giving weather reports for credits, FrankCastiglia looking for a new best friend and then just lots and lots of associates lying dead in the gutter. 

Hey, hey, hey, don't go knocking my man, TheWeatherman . People do rely on the weather reports and he has seen a decent amount of people who have expressed appreciation in the reports. Had it been reporting where we saw no viewers, then I would have given you that one. But based on the interest, we have bigger plans for him since the viewership numbers are there.

And yes, the Streets have been a mixed bag for lack of a better phrase. I would love to see us get back to the basics of the Streets for those interested in coming out of the shadows. ¹  

We currently have some works for the Streets in-progress and are excited when it comes time to release. We hope to see good ole' fashioned interaction with decorum and look forward to reciprocating.

I have been blessed to be surrounded by some good family members in our crew with BillyMastrosimone as our leader. One of our members had a wonderful idea to start a Range in the LA Business District and she had a good turnout so far. A few others frequent numerous businesses all over the US in hopes of supporting other mafioso's small businesses. I have nothing but positive things to say about my own personal experience in my journey to RHM for Mr. Mastrosimone. Dynamite stood up straighter and quickly brushed his suit with his hands. FYI if you ever need a place to stay in LA, stop by my hotel, the Paramount Hotel. 

Come on man, keep that big smile of yours. Keep your head up, it does make a difference remaining positive in this crazy world. While we are all mafioso, we are all human too. We cannot forget that there is someone behind that hard shell of a mafia man or woman, someone who isn't perfect but strives to make a difference and hopefully a positive one. After all, it's Valentines Day, let's share some love and positivity every day, or at least today.

Let me conclude and get off my soapbox by saying, thank you, FatGrin , for starting this conversation and also remaining open to giving a benefit of the doubt that maybe things just are not being reported. I would love to hear any family's positive successes to brighten the dark and rainy streets. I promise, TheWeatherman, I am not trying to forecast the weather in that last phrase of mine. Dynamite let out a chuckle.

^{1 OOC: I mean "for those interested in Role Playing", but mentioning the phrase "Role Playing" wouldn't be in character lol}

Dynamite, you obviously want Kuku to come back, but why should he (I) risk the ire of walking catastrophes like FrankCastiglia simply for providing a viral public demand?

What's in it for me?

Hear hear, Monella.  It's easy to sit back sending threatening telegrams, like a total fucking moron, it's harder to forge for oneself a pleasant life.

If we stop and think about the plight of those in Stalin's work camps and colonies, on terrible rations and beholden to frankly unattainable expected "norms" of work productivity, then we could do one of two things:

We could grateful for *not* being imprisoned in such conditions, replete with disturbing hierarchies and probably in close proximity to aggressive bears.

Or we could compare our own life in a spiral of nonsensical similies.  For example "oh, my boss wants me to pay $50k in tribute" says Gangster A, to which Gangster B says "yes, it's getting perilously close to being like a Gulag, where I had to stab a teenage Muscovite street urchin in the eye because he tried to steal my lard.  Fortuitously, though, I was able to lay first refusal on one-eyed Ivan's tunic, which i swapped with my Brigade boss for a hat."

I know which sort I am.

BillCorsica I think you for the nice words. However I really can not claim to be the perfect gentleman in this case. When I shot him, I did leave him a playful "No WS required" as the last thing he heard.

Apologies if I have made a mistake, Godfather. I did not see you in attendance and there is no record of you attending in the funeral guest book. 

Apologies if I have made a mistake, Godfather. I did not see you in attendance and there is no record of you attending in the funeral guest book. 

You're correct, I wasnt there, i however see him just before he perished. It was about the time i was standing over him, just as i pulled the trigger. As i was the last person he seen, i assumed i didn't need to attend his funeral  

Maybe you're having a wonderful time and positively thriving under the tutelage of X.

I would love to be under the Tuttelege of Tutte. But alas, I have yet to attain that privilege. I want to learn, and I'd be a good student too. With his help, I could conquer any sofa, no matter how tall.

Tutteo oh Tutteoh, wherefore art thou Tutteo?

Hi BillCorsica, what form did this harassment take?  Did your aunt employ any defensive measures against it?

Who here would pay me a few million to write a VERY INTERESTING article about the murder of Lucy?

I'd write a poem about a mobster of your choice as well

I'm not gonna lie, I'm kinda curious to see what you have to say.

I actually want to see how people see this as outsiders.

However, unfortunately I won't be the one to finance you. I'm sure someone else will though.

So this has rumbled on a few days and I guess everyone who wants to share something has already done so. I'm sure there were more speakers here at one point, but I guess they got binned for whatever reason.

On face value then, a RHM and LHM came to speak about the positive things their cities were doing, BillCorsica gave a rousing wing lifting report on the positives of Chicago, RobberBaron extolled on the virtues of Lucy, slain shortly thereafter. Nobody from Philly attended, like the Streets in general really, so no great shock there and I already know about the wonderful NYC.

I've summarised the results of my inquest below, please feel free to add your own as your discovered them. 

Detroit

Positives:

Lucy gives drugs money and sponsors associates.

Negatives:

Lucy gets shot. 

Have to prewarn the mourners at your funeral that LA Godfather Joseph-Ligambi is going to trample over them in his rush to announce no witnesses are sought for your murder before you're even cold.

Chicago

Positives:

Coined the term "Burgerhoused" (See the deaths of BuckBurgerhouse, Otis)

Announced first same-sex mafia marriage in Chicago Stadium.

Negatives:

Use the LHM position to fatten up potential victims pre-Burgerhousing. 

Los Angeles

Positives:

Forthcoming good ole' fashioned interaction with decorum being reciprocated. 

Negatives:

brent had torn hauled out of his wedding chapel like a piece of trash. 

Philly

Positives:

Not Chicago.

Negatives:

Zohan has been waiting 8 days for his cigars. 

Non-existent street presence. 

Las Vegas

Positives:

#1 VIP poster, DrPepper

Negatives:

#1 VIP poster, DrPepper

I'm looking forward to discovering more of the wonders the cities hold over in the coming hours, days and maybe weeks.