(Note: This was originally intended for the Mafia Tradizione but since a few desperate buggers decided to personally pester Sal each day asking for another issue and forcing him to take a break just to get away from it all... I'll post it as it's own entity.)

I mean come on... Really? You are really gonna go out in to a crowded street and start ranting, raving, yelling and sprouting your personal, secret mafia business to any Tom, Dick and Harry that will listen? We live in a world were secrecy and caution is paramount. Yet you want to go and sprout your bile for anyone to hear? We have Police Officers walking the beat, some corrupt but some are not. We have people from all cities able to hear what you are saying. However much that is the point, it's idiotic. Standing on some soap box, waving your arms around while speaking as if you've just come from an hour long session of "How to address the masses like a politician".

Over the past few years we have seen this thing of ours lose some of it's most loved and ignored traditions. Falure for example. Loyalty to your crewleader is another, but we'll go in to that another time. So why is it that this piss poor excuse for a way to get information across still standing? It should have been one of the first to go.

Now i'm going to give you examples, for all those out there that do not know how to address the majority in a proper manner.

PoisonousJelly was going about his daily business when all of a sudden the proverbial light balb flashed above his head and his eyes lit up. He couldn't wait to share the idea he just had with anyone who would listen. Walking down the street he found an old soap box lying on it's side, battered and nearly in bits. The streets were brimming with people going about their daily lives. Normal civilian people, working the shops and the stalls. Some serving the police men their daily dose of doughnuts. Knowing all of this PJ stood the soap box up on it's correct side, stepped on to it and shouted "OI!!! YOU LOT... I GOT SOME MAFIA BUSINESS I WANT TO TELL YOU ALL. EVEN THOUGH THIS SHIT WILL PROBABLY HAVE THE FBN WATCHING ME CLOSELY IF I DON'T GET ARRESTED RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW ANYWAY!!! HA, HOW STUPID AM I!!! ARE YOU LISTENING?!?!?!"

So, does anyone else see the idiocy in this yet? Let me show you how you could get around this and do it in a manner that actually suits the characters that we are, the business that we do day in and day out.

PoisonousJelly was going about his daily business when all of a sudden the proverbial light balb flashing above his head and his eyes lit up. He couldn't wait to share the idea he just had with his family. Walking down the street he found an old soap box lying on it's side, battered and nearly in bits. He jumped all over it, smashing it in to dis-repair. The streets were brimming with people going about their daily lives. Normal civilian people, working the shops and the stalls. Some serving the police men their daily dose of doughnuts. Knowing all of this PJ quickly dived in to a near by restaurant that was used a fair bit by his family. Walking through the door and giving a nod to the waitress he can clearly see his Crewleader sitting at one of the stalls reading the news paper. Knowing he was always the approachable kind of person PJ sat down opposite his Crewleader, gave a nod and leaned in closer. He then at a whispers level told his Crewleader the idea that he had just had.

Now... How hard was that? Anyone who has known me for any length of time will know I strongly disagree with the soap box and I think it's about time the masses should too.

Now at the risk of sounding like a raging lunatic who needs to go to OOC Rehab... A soap box? What mobster in their right mind do you know that has actually got a soap box in the middle of a street and announced no ones business in front of everyone? We are the mafia... for the love of god... What we do is against the grain of accepted society. So why go out and shout about it?

PJ, I'm mad a box of feckin' Scouse frogs.

I have a soapbox, I'm not afraid to use it and I will continue to do so.

I haven't notice intill now. Thank you PJ.

So that's what that smell is then MrKuklinski?

I have no fear of you using the soap box however. Not many seem to listen to you when you use it any how.

30 odd replies to my latest offering, PJ.

If we totalled the number of responses to my line's speeches it would comfortable surpass anyone, I think.

That may be true old friend but it does not excuse the fact that the majority are jokes and the like.

The majority of jokes are because people jump on the bandwagon.  We're talking about stimulating discussion and keeping the Streets alive.  My methods for doing that vary, but they are effective most of the time.

Sometimes it's in vogue to rubbish me, sometimes not.

So with that said and as much as I would like to go back and forth with you. How about actually replying with something that has meaning rather than with a simple and dismissive sentence?

Speech titled 'The Idiocy Of The Soap Box' and Kuklinski appears. Oh the irony.

I wasn't going to say anything originally as I am fairly busy, but seeing as everybody to reply has yet to bring something important and/or intellegent to the table, I figure I can think of something to say, it will be kept brief, however.

I have never looked at the soap box in this way, PJ. I guess I fall into the category of 'don't know how to address in a proper manner', however, so far my two speeches have not contained anything quite top secret, so I am safe.

What you say has merit, and has definately changed my perspective of the soap box. I join you in the banishing of the soap box, and together we can show these young mafiosi the correct way.

Z runs off to finish his business, but not before smashing a nearby podium over a sleeping bum's head.

Success! Dat soap box's swimmin wit da fishes.

To be fair to MrKuklinski, everyone’s speeches sound rubbish compared to Mr. Jelly’s. including this one!

WhereWasI puts the Soap Box PoisonousJelly broke back together, and watches as a monkey comes over and puts it on his head. The monkey panics and fires its gun barely missing a crowd of people.

Why the hell did you ever give them guns? And now that I've seen how the little bastards react around the boxes it's obvious why you're destroying the soap boxes. Unfortunately this time I agree, not only do soap boxes look ridiculous, but the stupid monkeys climb inside of them and freak out! Do what's right people, break the boxes, who knows who's gonna get hit by one of those stray shots from that stupid monkey, especially in a crowded area where these boxes are usually found!

Croccifixio walks closer to the little gathering in a shadey alleyway besides the busy street, checking that nobody not in the business is within hearing range before he speaks.

Not to sound like a kiss ass here but I have to agree with PoisonousJelly on this one. Just the thought of shouting our business in a public place in front of all those law abiding do gooders send shivers up my spine. Give me a secluded warehouse, a nice and safe cafe or our own headquarters anyday.

Sam listening to the Jelly's speech. Understanding the old argument he could see both sides.

Yes PJ, you raise a valid point. Strictly speaking none of us would ever wander into a crowded square and start spouting off sensitive information in a theatrically projected voice, that much is pretty obvious. We do it as an accepted concession of circumstance. Making the assumption that our constant bribes and greasing of palms has the local neighbourhood cops and civilians turning a blind eye and allowing us to speak in our own communities without fear of reprisal.

Your suggestion for a venue and method is valid in the sense that most of our business is conducted in quiet conversation and whispers between very small groups of people. The shortcoming with that however is that the entire community of mobsters we exist in would not be able to participate in such a conversation. There has to be a concession made at some point in order for our 'streets' to function.

If we go by the strict letter of the law and only ever speak in whispers then these streets become utterly obsolete and our world will begin to mirror any number of others around that are all vastly inferior for their lack of street activity. Soulless places, devoid of any pulse, intelligence, banter or fun. If we need to pay a bit extra to bribe local cops and box-off open areas for collective mobster discussions, I would say its worth it to avoid becoming the moronic soulless drones wee see inhabiting so many other societies.

Let's face facts - this world of ours has so many good points but one of those good points is not adherance to what some would term reality.  And we wouldn't want it to.

PJ makes an excellent point and if I were minded to acknowledge others prowess on the Streets I would do so.  But I'm not that way inclined so instead I craft overly verbose reportage in an obfuscatory manner.

Whilst PJ's point stands, his praxis is such that only a limited demographic will applaud his efforts.  The rest, influenced by knaves or without conceptual understanding, will acquiesce or else be led.  To them I have only this to say.

Do you look down on us all with disdain Kuku or is it just a select few?

Just a select few.  Disdain is earned, just like respect.

PJ is a Prince amongst men.

I always figured it would make much more sense to have these conversations in bars when some people overhear and then participate in the conversation but that in itself would be rude and be suspicion as well so I can see both sides of the story.

The soap box does "sound" a bit dumb, but concessions do have to be made because we need to let everyone get involved in these topics.

That's a good idea Alistair...  I might try and develop that.

I agree Alistair but I still do think it is better to do it that way rather than the ole soap box way. Looking back, I think it may have been more prudent to discuss this over on OOC avenue as I am finding it extremely difficult not to revert to such talk.

As for you WhereWasI: What makes you think I have trained my monkeys to believe that these soap boxes are the route of all evil and that the soap box itself should be shot on sight?

Big_Sam: I see your concern my big boned friend and again, it is so hard not to revert to OOC but I don't believe it is the way something is said that will make our streets obsolete.