Friends versus Enemies

In this thing of ours, I have six friends.  In this thing of ours, I have two people who I actively dislike.  

I can be as robustly confident of these numbers because of the social interaction that denotes friendship, and because it is so rare for me to actually really dislike someone on this game, that I recall them immediately.  

The two I dislike, I don't really consider enemies: they're just individuals who I think have personalities that I have zero respect for, and have proven to me via their actions that they are unworthy of my esteem.  

There are many dozens of individuals who I have friendly acquaintances with, and many others with whom I have unfriendly acquaintances.  I like the Gods of this thing of ours, and imagine that they have mixed feelings about me.  That's fine.

There are a number of members of this thing of ours whose deepest desire is for me to be cast out of this thing of ours forever and a day.  I don't wish that on anyone, even the two individuals I mentioned earlier for whom I have nothing but contempt.  It took me a long, long time to recognise and understand that the animus I feigned in communications with certain people was understated in the venom they directed towards me.  In short, I felt I was engaged in a battle of wits with "frenemies" - sparring, so to speak, and may the best person win.  

But for many of those who derided, chastised, and insulted my linage on the Streets, it didn't just stay there: they wanted me to disappear.  Whilst I have eventually, reluctantly, accepted that people like this exist, it still doesn't make any logical sense to me.

For what is this thing of ours if it is not a place to start, carry-out, escalate, and embellish feuds?  Is there a sweeter feeling, in this thing of ours, than besting a rival, using a pen or a gun?  Sure, the milk of human kindness nourishes us all, and keeps our friendships fortified, but it is the enmity that forces is to be agile, well-trained, and well-informed.

I am not without Sin, and neither is my linage.  Some people resent my linage and have done for decades.  So be it.  I hope that I reside in the "frenemy" category for most, if not all.  And if must be said, that those with whom I had the longest standing "beefs" seem to have left this life, or be conducting themselves differently.  I miss them.

At the moment, there are two prominent members of upper structures with whom I have had lineage beefs with.  And I'm not talking about a beefburger given as a prize in a competitive poetry slam, I'm talking about arguments over money, loans, competitions, prizes. and murder.

There's one man who I don't even know, but who considers me a mortal enemy.  I've never spoken to the man, and I know nothing about him.  He's in my crew.  I dare not speak to him, even through an intermediary, because he's well-armed and consumed with hatred for me.  His name is ******. 

One of the two individuals I strongly dislike is in my crew, and his name is *******, and let's just say nominative determination has rarely had a more obvious example.  I'd describe him as a neanderthal, but he's a lot more basic than that.  As Mikus will confirm, I am not somebody who will use a person's station in life as a basis to insult them, but the circumstances of my judgement of ******* deserve some exploration.  A distant relative of mine, for purely altruistic reasons, risked his life to intervene in something.  ******* had a longstanding friendship with a friend of mine.  A takedown was planned and executed, and *******'s ancestor was among the victims.  He got it into his bland brain that our mutual friend could have spoken up for him and saved him.  He couldn't have.  Seeing this friendship crumble, my ancestor contacted ******* and said "I could be killed for sharing this with you, but ..." and went on to detail the tight chain of command that didn't include our mutual friend.  Instead of being grateful, the troglodyte attempted to extort my ancestor, in badly worded messages of increasing volatility.   Needless to say, he was ignored and eventually was clipped when his irritation passed a certain threshold. 

But I'm glad he's here, and I don't want him to leave.  With such a dearth of quality, he could improve himself immeasurably with a minimum of effort - I believe that there is hope.  

But I've digressed.  As it is, I don't feel I have enemies worthy of the title.  There are no more spats in the Streets.  My argumentative telegrams are resolved quickly and with no escalation.  My demands for sit-downs are turned down.

I'm here, crying out for people of calibre to argue with and I am met with silence.

Have I made too many friends?  Is this a case of, eventually, my personable nature has been revealed to too many, and in winning the popularity vote, I have lost the relevance vote?

Why am i not one of the people you dislike? Have i failed?