Well, there may not be container crews, but there’s definitely hunger in the streets. Many empty bellies roaming around late at night unattended to and unsatiated. So, as a caring person, I am here to help give service.

Let me tell you a story that I learned from the Jesuits. A man was walking down the beach and saw a boy tossing starfish back into the ocean. The man asked the boy, why are you throwing the starfish back into the ocean? There are so many on the shore. You’ll never be able to help them all. And the boy told him, I’ll help as many as I can.

The story went something like that. So, here I am, at your service. I am an aider. I’m a volunteer. I’m compassionate.

Here we go. This will be my soup kitchen.

Welcome one and all to the new Great Container Crew Job Fair. We will be setting up shop in a gym in a school in New York. Drieza has gotten us the use of the gym, and let’s not fuck the floors up too much.

There have been so many hours and nights where we’ve found ourselves with a lack of sponsors. It’s pretty depressing. I can tell you. I know some people that did it much better, while others bitched and bitched and bitched and bitched.

But that’s why I’m here: To Help!

So, for starters, this job fair isn’t just for the unrecruited, but it’s also for the sponsors and uppers out there to get some food too and be social, rather than antisocial and mainly just lazy. Or perhaps worse like Kristoff, not caring and irresponsible, unlike a dutiful leader should be… Doing less than Aizen for once…

I digress… As in the past, there have been delectable goods for people to entice people into the gathering. So, I will start with naming our offerings. We do accept additional donations of course.

On one of the fold-out tables: We have a big pot of chili. Now you might be wondering, are there fixin’s? Yes, there are all the fixin’s. There are diced onions, dice tomatoes, shredded cheddar cheese, crackers ready for the breaking, and of course, sour cream.

Now onto the second table: We have a beautiful prime rib, cooked to perfection. On the side, there are mashed potatoes, creamed spinach, string beans, and julienned in butter carrots with dill. And yes, for those who like it, there is a horseradish cream sauce.

The third table is a real winner: We have chicken wings. Not just one type. There’s plain, buffalo, and a garlic parmesan. You can find the ranch dressing and blue cheese dressing just to the right of the trays. We also are offering French fries, with ketchup or mayonnaise.

The fourth table has: You got it! Burgers. Burgers of many varieties. There are normal hamburgers. There are cheeseburgers. Cheddar? Yes. American? Yes. Swiss? Yes. Provolone? Yes. There’s plenty of bacon, lettuce, and tomatoes. There are also sauces. Drieza provided us with his special sauce too, so be sure to try that. But wait—there’s more! There are hotdogs! With relish, mustard, ketchup, and special onions… Also, sauerkraut.

Table five has desserts. Cannoli’s, cakes, lobster tails (the pastry), ice cream (a full assortment), eclairs, sorbet, Italian ices, cookies, an array of fresh fruit, and of course, brownies. Oh right, there are also pies. Blueberry, raspberry, rhubarb, apple, and of course cream pies.

And finally, table six has what most people are looking for. Lemonade. There are other drinks, sure, but people really like the lemonade. It’s fresh, and we have a few different versions. There’s one with blackberries mulled at the bottom, blueberries, raspberries, strawberries. It’s all fresh squeezed and made to order. The other drinks include coffee, teas, sodas, and bleach.

So, this is a great start to the job fair. I hope you all show up and try to mingle and cover the job board, because otherwise, everything rots away, and you mustn’t be wasteful. It’s a sin. Waste not, want not. Let’s see you all do better. This is only a start to a happier, social, and more attended community. And that’s something you all care about, right?

Thank you.

Attention, you’re really slacking: El_Presidente, MongolMo, DuchessDingleberry, Interlude, Smithers, TheNewGuy, Cristoforo, Monarch, Noelle, EIkmilk, TextBasedMafiaRPGMan, Rorschach, WinstonChurchill, Bellamorte, Kristoff (Godfather)

Matt arrives without much ceremony, a faint smirk already settled on his face as he takes in the 'grand opening' making no real effort to hide it.

Impressive, truly. A full banquet laid out and yet somehow it all tastes a bit like hot air.

It’s almost admirable really how many words it takes to say absolutely fuck all. A meagre speech about service that somehow circles back to everyone else not doing enough. Could almost consider it efficient if it wasn't the same old tired routine from a one trick pony.

Matt taps the edge of the table lightly glancing toward the 'host'.

Strange though, for someone so concerned with hunger in the streets, you seem far more interested in announcing the kitchen than actually feeding anyone.

And the timing chef’s kiss. Just when things start moving again in this thing of ours, we get another performance. Almost like clockwork.

Matt shrugs unconcerned.

Still, I suppose there’s always someone who mistakes attention for relevance.

He turns slightly, already losing interest.

Anyway if this is meant to inspire action, I'd say we've be left wanting.  If it’s just noise well true to form, you’ve certainly delivered.

Carry on.

Tommy makes his way into the gymnasium where Spikes Job Fair is going underway. While he didnt need a job he offered them, he had heard of a huge spread of food to be served to the masses. Curious he heads inside, the first thing catching his attention Godfather Chairman Matt speaking. He smiled, guiding himself thru the various tables of goodies as he listened, for the time being a smile on his face, plate empty as he was perusing the smile fading immediately when he reaches the wings.

What the hell is this?... Ranch?.... RANCH? JoeyDiaz would turn in his fucking grave, I could already hear his voice..."Its either buffalo with blue cheese or go fuck your mother." 

Tommy looks to the right, eyes shifting to the left as he begins to pick up every single cup of ranch he could find. Pausing for a moment to make sure nobody is keeping an eye on what he is about to do. A service to the community as he proceeds to dump all the ranch dressing in the garbage bin. A calmed sigh afterward as he makes his way to the exit he could only mutter the words.

They will thank me later. Lord knows you are JoeyDiaz. 

TGT was notified of a job fair jumping off on our great shores.

She pauses and pulls out her nifty black book because this had a bit of familiarity. Satisfied this was a social gathering with an array of food.

This is a grand idea! The layout is lovely.  Thankfully it is extended beyond the late hours of the evening. You won't find my old bones out in the late hours. 

Looking around she spots Matt and gives him a wave. She also noticed breakfast foods were not available. We will need table seven. I'm certain MichaelHaller will foot the bill. He's very rich. We will need croissants, biscuits with sausage gravy, an array of fruits, and we muct not forget some good old S.O.S shit on a shingle. Any requests for breakfast please forward to Michael. I'll make certain he obliges.

Where in the hell is my Jazzy Jazz @Jazz? Come get some social time and food!