Enricho walks the streets alone most days. Cheerfully smiling and walking about the streets to see what new and interesting things could find him. He watches as someone in a mask runs off and he quickly taps his pocket. As the realization hits: An unidentified assailant pickpocketed you taking $1000 "That bastard stole my beer money! Lucky bastard figured out my.." Enricho pauses in his anger as he realized he has on the wrong pants. "Damn it! I forgot to sew zippers onto this pair! Drats!" Enricho could feel his rage bubbling. Mostly against himself for forgetting to make this pair of pants pickpocket resistant.

"Best stop off at the tailor. Hopefully they don't look at me sideways again. I'm simply out of zippers to sew in." Enricho rounded the corner off to the tailor. He watched as a friend of his got their pocket snatched by another masked assailant. Without knowing who it was that needed a good mugging, Enricho left the situation as it was and exclaimed for the world to here: "Enricho shall unmask these damned pocket snatchers! They WILL be mugged! They WILL learn who holds dominance! The Great Enricho shall unmask these bastards who keep stealing MY beer money!"

As Enricho finished his exclamation, he entered the tailor finding a new mission for himself: unmasking pocket snatchers

Have you considered buttons friend? less clunky than zippers and accomplish almost the same job you could even do snap buttons!

Im no tailor but im sure buttons would probably be easier to source.

could even do a purse if the mood strikes you so, ive seen some fashionable folks wear a purse around their waist in some picturebooks from other countries.

Enricho, Enricho, Enricho. 

Have you ever considered not carrying around your beer money all willy nilly? Surely you can find a safer spot to leave it between beer runs like under a mattress? An old shack that no one knows about with a hole in the wall? Maybe even under your leader's desk leg where surely no one would notice?

There has to be a better way. 

Should you come up with no better idea I wish you luck in unmasking thieves. Hope you eat your carrots daily!

Buttons?! Buttons are so out of fashion! Zippers are the new COOL thing! Just ask Marylin Monroe how she keeps her dresses tight to her chest! It's all zippers! The sound of the zip vastly outways the sound of the snap good sir, TheTripleDeuce! The Great Enricho always has an ear into fashion! Now, I've heard of a new invention much like the purse you mentioned, but I fear it would look out of place on my waste considering the suits I prefer to wear! Maybe I'll find one of these "fanny packs," and give it a try. MAYBE!

Miss Zephyra, this beer money is for my time out on the streets, my daily allowance if you will! If I hid it away, I wouldn't be able to quench the thirst of a hot afternoon! Zippers are the only way! I guess I have to catch the local farmer for some carrots then! Possibly the local dealer for something to make me quicker too!

Ive heard talks of a certain pocket that prisoners use but i dont know how convenient it would be when at abar trying to grab a quick drink

I have also heard of such a pocket from my time in the federal slammer! I do not think it wise to use such a place. Especially for every day items like money! I would be appalled if someone decided to reach back and hand me crusted money!

It isn't much but I am glad to help you grab a few beers

Your accountant makes note that $10,000 has been wired to EnrichoLives from your account. The note "Beer fund" was included.

What a glorious gift! Thank you very much! The Great Enricho shall share a beer with you the next time I see you!

We should open our own public house EnrichoLives and then at least we won't have to pay full price every time

That could be the perfect idea! What would we call it?! A billiards table is a must, The Great Enricho loves a good game of pool!

I would want everyone to get one free beer a night on my tab! Except that PropertyManager, he pays double!

Enricho has been pondering over the prospect of opening a bar. What would the name be? He thought, The Great Enrocho's has a nice ring to it. If I succeed and open more, surely everyone would flock no matter what city we set up shop! He continued thinking on this topic for a short while and while stuck in his own mind about the possibilities, he's wondered aimlessly into the Pawn Shop Headquarters bumping into one of the guards as they directed him the right way inside.

"The Great Enricho must speak to the Incredible Shaggs! Hopefully he will allow me to open this bar that's been on my mind lately!" Enricho exclaimed as he finally looked up from his thoughts. He wasn't sure who had heard him as he was yelling at the foyer door just past the entrance. In his abscent minded walking, he didn't even make it inside to exclaim his excitement.