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| 101 Things to do at Walmart | Started by: Lust on Oct 17, '08 16:57 |
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101 Things to do at Walmart - Enjoy 1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations. 2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store. 3. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day. 4. Start playing Football; see how many people you can get to join in. 5. Run up to an employee (preferrebly a male) while squeezing your legs together and practically yell at him "I need some tampons!!" 6. Try on bras in the sewing/fabric department. 7. Try on bras over top of your clothes. 8. Make a trail of orange juice on the ground, leading to the restrooms 9. While walking around the store, sing in your loudest voice possible "sex and candy" 10. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code 3 in Housewares," and see what happens. 11. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and turn the volumes to "10". 12. Play with the automatic doors. 13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!..." etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment. 14. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, "Who BUYS this shit, anyway?" 15. Repeat #14 in the jewelry department. 16. Try putting different pairs of women's panties on your head and walk around the store casually. 17. Leave small sacrifices or gifts in the hands of the mannequins. 18. Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field. 19. As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, "Wow. Magic!" 20. Put M&M's on layaway. 21. Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas. 22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath. 23. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners. 24. Nonchalantly "test" the brushes and combs in Cosmetics. 25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, "...I'm Batman. Come, Robin--to the Batcave!" 26. TP as much of the store as possible. 27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles. 28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello" upside down. 29. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?" 30. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, "Red Rover!" 31. Look right into the security camera, and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose. 32. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men. 33. Take bets on the battle described above. 34. Set up another battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. G.I. Janes. (Red lipstick might give an interesting effect!!!) 35. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as possible. 36. While no one's watching quickly switch the men's and women's signs on the doors of the rest room. 37. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission: Impossible." 38. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags. 40. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags. 41. Fill your cart with boxes of condoms, and watch everyone's jaws drop when you attempt to buy them. 42. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store. 43. Two words: "Marco Polo." 44. Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in the pet food aisle,etc. 45. "Re-alphabetize" the CD's in Electronics. 46. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna" look with various funnels. 47. Hide in the clothing racks and when people browse through, say things like "the fat man walks alone," and scare them into believing that the clothes are talking to them 48. While walking around alone, pretend someone is with you and get into a very serious conversation. Exp: The person is breaking up with you and you begin crying "How could you do this to me? I thought you loved me! I knew there was another girl, but I thought I had won. You kissed ME darling." Then act as though you are being beaten and fall onto the ground screaming and having convulsions. 49. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "No, no! It's those voices again!" 50. Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check people out. 51. Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don't get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it. 52. Get a stuffed animal and go to the front of the store and begin stroking it lovingly, saying "Good girl, good bessie." 53. Go over to the shoe department and try on every pair of shoes, not putiing one pair back. Take the paper from the boxes and throw it in various aisles. 54. When someone steps away from their cart to look at something,quickly make off with it without saying a word. 55. Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department. 56. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon. 57. Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles. 58. In the makeup department, spray yourself with every perfume there is, then walk up to a boy who is with another girl and start flirting with him in that annoying, ditsy way. "hi!!!! (giggle) What's your sign?(giggle)." When the boy shows no interest, start hitting on the girl the exact same way. "hi!!!! (giggle) What's your sign? (giggle)." 59. Hold indoor shopping cart races. 60. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit. 61. When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially thin narrow aisles. 62. Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out. 63. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap. 64. Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time. 65. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?" 66. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., "Do you have any Shnerples here?" 67. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you're taking it for a "test drive." 68. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters. 69. Get boxes of Condoms and randomly put them in peoples carts when they don't realize it. 70. Get an empty book, and say it's a guest book. Get people to sign. 71. Play a game of indoor freeze tag 72. Drive around the entrances screaming out the window "the British are coming" 73. Have a team race with your friends- one person sits in the cart, the other pushes 74. Go to the checkout and buy a bar of candy. Repeat, going to the same cash register, until the clerk notices 75. Fill your cart up as much as possible, and then try to use the express lane 76. Use a bullhorn and occasionally say that there is free candy in aisle X (aisle X being the condom aisle) 77. Run into a pyramid of cans, heroically saing "I'm gonna save us from that bomb!" 78. Use a conveyer belt as a treadmill and lose some weight 79. Grab heavy but not too heavy objects, and see who can throw them the most aisles over. 80. When people aren't looking, put tampons in their carts if they are a guy, or if they are a gal, put in a jock strap. 81. Randomly direct people to the deodorant section 82. Tell someone that you will sue for false advertising, since they do not sell walls. 83. Take your boyfriend or girlfriend to the food section and have an expensive dinner. 84. Try to push your cart through a checkout without paying. When the clerk tries to stop you, kick in his balls (dont try it on a chick, it wont work), run, but leave the cart. See what happens. 85. If people arent looking at their cart, steal it. 86. Go to the gun section, saying "Can I buy a gun? I'm tired of that stupid smily face!" 87. Buy expensive stuff, go home and use wite-out and a pen to change the price to something much lower, and the total much higher, then return and demand a refund. 88. See how much stuff you can break before you get caught 89. Take a leak in the dressing rooms. 90. Repeadeately say "The clowns are not eating me." 91. Use fake checks, but sign them using your neighbors name. 92. Rearrange items as you see fit. 93. Take a full set of guy's clothes and a full set of gal's clothes, then leave them lying somewhere. 94. Put pokemon stuff in a cart that is full of stuff like KoRn and Limp Bizkit CDs 95. Grab condoms and stick them in everyone's face (only the opposite sex) 96. Do #95 but with the same sex (not recomended) 97. Grab stickers that say "radioactive" and put them randomly on food items. 98. Follow someone until they notice 99. Puoll out pins, like that guy form the 7up commercial 100. Loiter. When asked to leave, tell them you live here. 101. Record yourself while having sex, then have it play over and over gain in the middle of a clothes rack. |
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| I like 88 | |
| Reply by: SaulSilver at Oct 19, '08 07:07 | |
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| 86 happens to be my favorite | |
| Reply by: Nichola at Oct 19, '08 18:44 | |
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| how long were you in here for? | |
| Reply by: Mac at Oct 20, '08 01:22 | |
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Don't tell someone Code 3, that doesn't mean anything. Pick up a phone and page a "Code White" in a random location and watch all the managers start running. Or a Code Brown if you wanna scare the shit out of people. (White == accident, Brown == Shooting Situation) |
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| Reply by: ProphetOfDeath at Oct 20, '08 01:43 | |
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| I'm a fan of crapping in the urinal. That's always good for a few laughs. | |
| Reply by: Rodney_Phatballz at Oct 23, '08 05:40 | |
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| i like 101 lol thats cool | |
| Reply by: Mikhail-Faustin at Oct 23, '08 16:13 | |
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Most worthwhile time I've had in the slammer...thanks Lust. ~Ace |
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| Reply by: The_Ace at Oct 23, '08 23:28 | |
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| hehe I love this .. | |
| Reply by: StripheCorelli at Oct 24, '08 01:55 | |
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| #98 is the best one makes people think ur security | |
| Reply by: the_jackel at Oct 24, '08 14:11 | |
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| Wow, I'm SO saving this for a list of things to do while shopping. Thanks Lust, your funny. | |
| Reply by: Lylithe at Oct 25, '08 04:42 | |
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| #77 is good | |
| Reply by: Ireland_123 at Oct 25, '08 13:02 | |
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| Go into the fitting room and pull down you pants and sit on the bench thing for about 5 or so minutes. Then yell "HEY! THERE IS NO TOILET PAPER IN HERE!" | |
| Reply by: ProphetOfDeath at Oct 25, '08 14:15 | |
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| we like to play bball in walmart lol or ride the bikes | |
| Reply by: King_Cav at Oct 25, '08 16:37 | |
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I might do #86 Cause thats the type shit we do. anythang that can be a bit embarrassing to the avg person. If I do Ill have a friend record it and I'll upload it to youtube or w.e . And I always get followed by security lol Cops love to give me "questionaires"...pigs I tell them Im shopping for bacon..lol nothing they can say..they sell bacon! |
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| Reply by: King_Cav at Oct 26, '08 02:05 | |
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lol this is useful ! =] a day in walmart....hmmm...this will be interesting !!! |
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| Reply by: xxSunShinexx at Feb 15, '09 01:02 | |
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63. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrapLol at that. I want to do this!! I also enjoy eating all the sweets in the pick n mix section. YUM! |
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| Reply by: Preeyah at Feb 17, '18 10:54 | |
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I sometimes wish we had a walmart here just to try and see how huge it is compared to our supermarkets here lol |
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| Reply by: Snowball at Feb 18, '18 00:12 | |
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Only place I know where you can pick up diapers and a chainsaw at the same time. |
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| Reply by: Briya at Feb 18, '18 00:14 | |
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I have my plan for next weekend! |
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| Reply by: Frankie-Messina at Feb 18, '18 00:31 | |
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