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Tea Time: Generation-X Gossip Tabloid
Issue Two: Twice As Nice (And Kinda Bitchy)
You asked, we delivered! We had many people contact us over the past week, thanking us for reviving the once-thought-dead Tea Time, and to those people we would like to say "You're welcome". We also took into consideration a lot of what everyone had to say. Not enough name drops? We're on it this issue. Not enough sass? We're just getting warmed up, kids. The love and adoration you show to us makes us want to try harder for you, and so we are pleased as punch to bring to you our second issue- now with 50% more awesome.
Once again, we couldn't do it without the support of the community, so thank you all for contributing to our surveys, our gossip section, and for reading our paper in the first place! Hope you think this paper is up to scratch, and if you don't think it is, at least you have lining for your litter boxes.
Wake us up before you go-go,
CASHMONEYMILLIONAIRE, ZomBee and Katniss
Disclaimer: If you are a mobster, within the six crime cities of the United States of MafiaReturns, you may be the subject of one or many of our articles. Alive, dead, mentally impaired, no one is safe from TT:GX! Please forward all comments, questions or concerns to Tea Time Editors, c/o Katniss.
*****
Rogues and Underground Crews
Looks Like Your Cheeks are a Little Pink
Article by Reporter Pot
Last week we asked you, the reader; "Recently the streets have been buzzing with information from former 'Underground' or 'Rogue' crews of the past. What do you think: do underground/rogue crews really have the power to change our world anymore?".
Yes 30.43% 7 responses
No 47.83% 11 responses
Maybe So 21.74% 5 responses
Total Respondents: 23
The responses were not swayed totally to one side or the other. Many felt that being part of an underground crew does not have the power to change our world. Looking back on old transcripts, I've come across information that has proved our world has seen some effective and even successful rogues. How come we can't take a note from our ancestors and get it right these days?
Some of the responses were very short and sweet, such as "It always works if you work it." To more elaborate ones; "Currently no, I think the mobsters that are currently around are too old, as are the current cities. It would be almost impossible for any rogue/underground groups to even make a small dent in the current set up. Mostly now it's about minimal damage, damage that won't really make a massive difference to the cities. Which is a shame to be honest. I don't condone such action but it should be a real threat within the (game) and sadly, it's just not. An underground crew must consist of a good amount of people, most won't commit out of fear of being caught and losing their lives, again this links back into life expectancy length, if we didn't live as long, people wouldn't be scared as much and have a go.".
Some opinions voiced the concern of Rogues being sort of a suicide mission where you know you're not going to get far, or are just simply frustrated to the point where you give up and say 'I'm going to get what I want'. Another point was made that once the current leaders see an unauthorized crew set up, they immediately order their member back to their home cities and it just becomes one huge waiting game as the rogues are hiding behind protected walls.
"To change the face of this world means you need a change of the most powerful in Society. That takes a major war, not a handful of asshats sitting round circle jerking," one of the comments reads, and I can't help but wonder if that's necessarily true. It takes something bigger than a Capo with a 50 kill gun to do some real damage. However, if you have a group of six ranging from Boss to Don and they each have decent numbers backing them, I would venture to say that they could do some significant damage if they carefully planned out their moves. "If they weren't being organised by a bunch of impatient children they could still have an impact." People are impatient these days, no one has the discipline to actually lay low and wait for the right time to strike.
Another commenter mentions "Not in any meaningful way, people are too dedicated to preserving the status quo, but they can potentially clip a poorly protected RHM." Is that a veiled threat at one of our less that IWP Right hand men/women of our cities? Probably not, as Underground crews and Rogues these days can't seem to figure out how to take charge and make something worthwhile happen. This begs the question: are people too afraid to do anything these days for fear that their next of kin would be looked upon poorly? If that is the case then why even entertain the thought of 'ranking up and doing something about it'?
It seems the only Rogue that stands out in history would be old Oliver_McTavish. He definitely did not have the backing of the Acting Godfather Council at the time he set up, and did so as a result of DiscoDuck killing his Crewleader. He even came out to the streets and didn't try to hide what he did: "I am here to belatedly introduce my family, Badass Inc.. We are a small sub-division of my former family. As you all know this crew was not one that was formed with a happy purpose and intent behind it. I was not a proper authorization from the former Acting Godfather Counsel."
After the war ended, he was allowed to live and paved the way to prove that a Rogue can change the face of the world we all live in. As another commenter mentioned "One voice on a mountain can cause an avalanche of change."
There you have it folks, if you want to be part of an underground crew or even rogue yourself you have to be patient and know when to strike. Made Men need not apply.
*****
HEIDI RIDING HARD AGAIN
Unemployed Reporters Do It For Money
Ramble by Reporter Heidi Hoels
Ah, the unburdened lifestyle where one's biggest concern is how to reasonably schedule enough time for each of your seven shirtless cabana boys to lovingly massage cocoa butter into your thighs as you watch the sun retreat majestically from the sky, a coconut full of rum and pretty colors in hand, without fostering homicidal jealousy amongst their ranks (RIP Chet, you'll always hold a special place in my inner-pelvic area.). Despite this romanticized notion, retirement can actually be quite hard on a gal. Especially when said retirement comes at the age of thirty-two and not as reward for years of hard work, but rather because your only willing employer has changed their locks and filed a restraining order against you. Following this, the original editors of Tea Time reluctantly yet graciously accepted my letter of resignation, even when they fully understood that my departure meant that their paper would have no choice but to fold indefinitely. Simply put, I had to move on; greener pastures awaited.
It had been a long and busy day when I finally sashayed my way into the executive board-kitchen of my new corporate offices. The CEO had a knowing look in his eyes as he greeted me in a way that was somehow more than curt. He gave me the full Curtis.
"Heidi, we need to talk." He said.
"Oh, of course, Mr. McClusky."
"Look..."
"I know I haven't been bringing in as much milk lately, but Ol' Bessie just hasn't been herself! I'm worried it might be brucellosis, if you..."
"This isn't about that. It's about these friends of yours you've had calling here."
With that, a chill wormed it's way down my spine. Friends? What friggin' friends? Nobody even knew where I was. True, my departure from the public eye had been hard on millions of my adoring devotees, with rumors of me being sighted in such places as the Pacific Northwest, The Great Wall of China and even Mars running rampant early on. But that had all died down within the first few years, following my campaign of contracted assassinations targeting anyone who bared even a passing resemblance to me on the basis of copyright infringement.
"Danny took the calls." Mr. McClusky told me, "Five this morning alone."
Ah, young Daniel, the Senior Vice President of Stable Operations. No more than a eager boy when I had met him, the course of our acquaintanceship had molded him into a ruggedly hunkish stallion of a man. I pulled him aside into my quarters, so that he could relay the messages to me in relative confidence and full embrace. Turns out, my mysterious caller was none other than Kettle herself, beckoning on behalf of the new editors of the re-established Tea Time. Her message-- they'd love to have me back, provided I wasn't too busy shooting smack and servicing half of the eastern seaboard. Too busy? Ha! It was clear at once that I had no choice but to hop the first bus back to the city and take up my rightful chair as the preeminent field journalist for the new Tea Time.
This left just one loose end to tie up. Daniel. He simply knew too much. Sadly, I had to blow his brains out.
Sadder still, once that was taken care of I had to shoot the poor dear too.
Once at the bus station, I elbowed my way to the courtesy phone and put in a hurried call to Katniss with a list of demands, and to let her know that I was making time to Chicago with all due haste.
"But our office is in..."
"Mmhmm, Chicago."
"No, we..."
"See you there, sweety! Kisses!"
-Click-
My arrival in the city was a much celebrated affair, as my affairs often are. Some of the local bars even poured me drinks for free, the lovely proprietors even making a joke of chasing me down the street with baseball bats as I departed their businesses, the darlings. It's so good to be wanted again. What's more, the local Families' underlings were simply tripping over each other to offer me residency within their organizations. Within a day, I had slipped back into the life like a well-worn shoe (not that I would really know what that was like).
Looking up the address I remembered led me to the old Tea Time satellite office, it's facade boarded up and dressed in what appeared to be the grime of several neglected years. Oh, those wonderful bitches. It did my heart good to see that their sensibilities hadn't changed. Snagging my dress on the way in through the window, I made a mental note to include this on my expense report and gleefully announced my presence. Silence.
I checked my watch- 4:37 pm. But of course. If I know my gals, they were probably wrapping up their customary twelve martini lunch.
I dragged my bags up the stairs to my old office. I must confess that it wasn't quite the setup I had outlined on the phone with Katniss, but this could be overlooked for now, seeing as how they had seemingly supplied me with a passable male escort. Though, it did seem that mens fashion had changed a considerable bit in my absence, and he certainly wasn't top-of-the-line. His Eau de Toilette smelled more like Eau de Shithole.
"Why, hello there. I'm Heidi."
"Henry." He hacked, "Can I smell your underwear?"
"Well, certainly not from there, I should hope."
Henry and I held hands and shared a bottle of coppery wine as we watched the city come to life that night from the comfort of my office. The buzz of the streetlights as they flickered on seemed to be solely for our benefit. The distant gunfire a melodious composition of our passions. The desperate cries for help drifting up from the street below a sweet serenade. The world turned for us, and us alone. There, we surrendered to the most basic of our desires amid the romantic glow of a small trashcan fire. I felt like a Queen, her empire returned to her in all her glory.
*****
A Day in the Life
Presenting Godfather DeadlySin
Interview by Reporter Pot
This week I had the privilege of interviewing the Godfather or Philadelphia, DeadlySin. There were times I felt a little uneasy, but hey that's the life of the reporter. You do what it takes to get the story.
The Godfather agreed to meet with me in his headquarters. I don't believe he gets out much, rightfully so. I arrive just before seven thirty in the morning. As I pull up, I hear the sound of gunshots coming from the second floor of Godfather DeadlySin's HQ. I freeze in my tracks, seconds later I regain my bearings and make my way over to some screaming children gathered in a circle. I am shocked to find one of the children lying in a pool his own blood. DeadlySin exits the building and rifles through the child's pockets. He quickly pulls something out and places it in his own pocket. He looks to me with a stern grimace on his face.
"Come back at Five O'clock."
Of course I oblige. As I leave, I'm even wondering if this is going to be worth it. All of these Godfathers seem to be a little off their rockers. Are they just becoming senile? Is it just the path that a successful mobster goes down in this life of ours?
I returned at Five O'clock on the dot, and DeadlySin's maid let me in with a welcoming smile across her face. I bet she was just happy he let her answer the door, just so she could feel the crisp evening air on her face for a split second. She led me to the sitting area where the Godfather sat in a plush oversized two seat couch.
"Good evening, Godfather DeadlySin. Thank you for agreeing to meet with me today. I know you must be a busy man… after all, you seemed to have quite the morning."
The man just sat there, rather unimpressed and emotionless about the whole encounter this morning.
"What I wanted to do was essentially follow you around today, but you sent me away. So now I'll just ask you to recap what you do on a daily basis. It's for the people, they always want to know."
Reporter Pot (P): Did you make your bed?
Godfather DeadlySin (DS): Yes. I am very good at DIY, I also made my table and my chairs.
P: Fair enough, Sir. They are very well constructed if I do say so myself.
They actually weren't very well constructed at all, but I dare not tell him that to his face.
P: Where did you spend your day?
DS: I spent my day at Philly's public swimming pool, with my strap on shark fin. I must admit, after the first ten times scaring everyone out of the pool, it got no less amusing.
P: Who did you see/call?
DS: I briefly saw Phil Steak, as he leapt from the pool screaming like a little girl.
P: How did you procrastinate?
DS: Well first, I dimmed the lights. Then I put on "With My Little Ukelele in Hand" and unplugged the telephone. After that I opened my top drawer and got out my lotio...
Deadly stops as Pot looks shocked.
DS: Oh. Procrastinate. Sorry.
P: Errr, we will just forget that ever happened… Moving right along, what did you accomplish?
DS: An interesting question. Personally I considered it an accomplishment that I didn't shoot all of those kids this morning, and that I resisted the temptation to unleash an actual shark in that swimming pool.
P: What did you want to accomplish?
DS: World domination. What can I say, I get distracted easily!
P: Did you exercise?
DS: Yes, I "exercised" furiously. I even have the friction burns to prove it.
P: What were you wearing?
DS: Nipple clamps and a snorkel.
P: Thank you for changing into something more suitable for this interview, Sir.
DS: Who's to say that I've changed completely?
P: I know a guy who'd be into that. His name is leadfoot. You should contact him. What did you read?
DS: I read the new Tijuana Bible.
P: Doesn't surprise me. How do you feel about broccoli?
DS: It looks like little trees.
P: What was the healthiest and unhealthiest thing you ate?
DS: Healthiest thing... Potatoooes! Unhealthiest... The sweets in the pocket of the child I shot.
Holy shit, that's what I saw him pull out of the dead boy's pocket this morning. How twisted.
P: What was the best part of the day?
DS: Finding twenty dollars on the side of the road.
P: What was the worst part of the day?
DS: Losing that twenty dollars.
P: I bet you blew it on cocaine. Any surprises today?
DS: Yeah, someone said something about tea time, and then you started asking me questions. I was expecting food.
P:: I can make some Potatoooes!
I was hoping he would say no, because I was not actually going to make him and potatoes. I'm a reporter after all, not a chef.
P: Favorite time of day?
DS: Any time that involves eating or sleeping.
P: Sounds like a typical male. What is your favorite color?
DS: Clear.
P: Coffee drinker?
DS: Does the Pope shit in the woods?
P: I wouldn't think he would need to?
Seriously?
P: What did you make your Right Hand do today?
DS: Well first, I dimmed the lights. Then I put on "With My Little Ukelele in Hand" and unplugged the telephone. After that I opened my top drawer and got out my lotio... Oh wait, you mean Marston? He doesn't do much frankly, he's a bit slow in the head. Today I taught him how to tie his shoe laces.
P: Any last words for me?
DS: Don't follow me, I'm lost too.
As I look around to make my exit before it gets any creepier, DeadlySin stands up from his chair and extends his hand to meet mine.
P: Thank you for your time, Sir. I certainly appreciate giving us all some insight to your rather eclectic daily life.
DS: Don't forget to introduce me to that Gentleman you mentioned earlier.
P: I'll see what I can do.
*****
Tea Time presents... Real Mobsters of Genius
(Real mobsters of geeeeniiiuuuuuus!)
Today we salute you, Mr. Unit by Unit Drug Purchaser.
(Mr. Unit by Unit Drug Purchas-ah!)
You, my friend, can be seen walking down the darkest of alley ways and negotiating deals with the shadiest of drug mules.
(Bring down that price a bit!)
Always on the hunt for the freshest supply, you won't hesitate to throw down some cash to buy that merch... unit by unit.
(I'm careful with my moneyyyy!)
Why do things in mass quantity, when you can take your time and buy one by one until your heart is content?
(It's all about the achieve-MEEEENTTTSSS!)
So have yourself a nice, hot cup of tea Cautious Consumer. The rest of us admire your dedication, and thank you for the stack of fifty notifications from our DFPs the next morning.
(Mr. Unit by Unit Drug Purchaserrrrrr!)
*****
There's Something About Boston
Hair-Gel and Rumors Abound
Article by Reporter Kettle
As much as I dislike running an article about the same thing twice in two papers, it seems that everyone cannot get Boston off of their minds. Through our new feature, "Share Your Gossip!", we received a few wild claims, anywhere from Detroit leader Toast enjoying the company of midgets, to "A Certain LHM in a Certain city seems to prefer the company of men to that of women" (we assume Donbot, and wish him and Camazotz nothing but the best). Nothing, though, seemed to get more time or speculation than that of our sweet, oft ignored bastard child city, Boston.
From who is in control of making the decisions, to who will be making a move and how, the city is an undeniable question mark at this point in time. When initially the city offered it's services and city limits to our way of life, we knew it would be but a temporary arrangement. Yet it seems as if the empty space is starting to get the ladies and gentlemen of our world itchy: for success, for glory, for money and blood.
We here at Tea Time have it on good authority (and obviously by that we mean NO authority whatsoever) that someone is already planning a move to Boston in the not so distant future, and has already started a slow recruitment process for followers. Until all information is 100% verified, we will not disclose details or names, however, much like any and all big decisions, I would like to pose a question to the leaders thinking of taking the city : is this the right move?
As said before, Boston was meant to be a temporary fix to help our world stabilize after the loss of Los Angeles and Las Vegas. While some of the men and women at the top may have forgotten that it's bound to disappear at any time, many members of the community have not. We received overwhelming response to our survey on Baahhston from last week's paper, and it seems as if the general consensus is to 'leave it the fuck alone'. With close to fifty percent of the respondents fervently declaring that they would rather see the city empty than occupied, it really does make you wonder whether leaders truly feel the same, or if the rumors that have been told to us are true?
Though nothing has been previously, at least publicly, discussed on what will be happening with Boston, it makes many wonder if anyone actually owns the city? One mobster states, "I think that since the city belongs to noone, then to presume to have the authority to give someone leadership in a city that is not yours, is the height of arrogance." In the case of our golden rumor, it seems as if people will be attempting to seize something that is not theirs to take. Or is it? Not being privy to these conversations (and understandably so, we're peons), we have no idea if the city has been give to any particular Godfather, or if it will be given at all.
Only time will tell if Boston is left to fend for itself, or claimed as the newest territory for a leadership expansion. Yet the striking words of the community should serve as a guideline for how the general mafiosi see the matter: "Leave it alone. Like, literally, leave it shivering under a light post, with a single tear streaking down it's cheek as it watches your tail lights fade into the night."
*****
Gather 'Round for Tales of Olde
This Week in Mafia History
Generation by generation the world changes around us. Sometimes it is for the good, sometimes it is for the worse. Whatever happens in the here and now is always somehow shaped by our ancestors, and we are forever touched by their contributions to our world, no matter how long ago. So come gather around, smile as you hear the names and events of the past. Maybe your mothers and fathers are featured!
Editor's Apology and Correction From Issue One: Leader Marcus was NOT from New York, as originally stated, before moving to Detroit. He started in Chicago. Our apologies for the misprint!
Let's revisit what happened the week of January 18th to January 24th in the history of This Thing.
One Year Ago:
19th- Mobster GoodFellas is authorized to start a family in Las Vegas.
24th- Mobster Sinfest starts a family, Viva La Resistance!, in Philadelphia.
Two Years Ago:
18th- Former Right Hand Tanda assumes control over the family of fallen leader Caveman.
20th- Mobster Cross_DeCaprio is authed into Los Angeles (Orange County Byrds), while businessman InspectorGadget authed into Detroit (W.O.M.P.).
21st- Then Godfather of New York, TheDean, retires, leaving Whatshername as his successor. Mobster space_pole is authorized to start a family in New York (The Space Monkeys). RoRoG, leader of New York, moves his family to New Orleans where he seizes the position of Godfather. Leader DavyJones is granted position of Godfather in Philadelphia. Then leader TonyCorelli (The Corelli Crime Family) moves to Las Vegas, taking the position of Godfather. He auths trusted friends Junk_in_the_Trunk (The Fremont Street Experience) and AnthonyCorelli (The Tyrants of Justice) to take leadership positions underneath him. Mobster Kimble is authed into Chicago (The Morningwood Elite).
22nd- Two mobsters are authorized to start families in New Orleans: Anthony_Bellarosa (The Order of the Black Rose), and -BostonGeorgeJung (The Dharma Initiative).
24th- -iocaste- sets up shop in St. Louis (The Marshalls)
Three Years Ago:
18th- Leader Kates is given permission to move to New Orleans. Mobster GabrielMancini is authorized to set up a crew in New York (Mancini Enterprises). Then New York leader Lucretia_Borgia (House of Borgia) is authorized to move to Las Vegas, where mobster Youngsta is authorized to set up a crew. Las Vegas leader Cryptic sets up his first captaincy in the form of Giovanni_Bontade.
19th- Godfathers Aurora, Rhuarc and BoabyWanKenobi were assassinated in a country-wide war.
20th- Then New York Don GabrielMancini dies to a gun malfunction.
22nd- Then mobster Return_of_Ghost is granted captaincy in Detroit. St. Louis Don, Paul_Vidi, dies due to a gun malfunction.
24th- Then leader Quirinus moves his operations to St. Louis.
*****
Life and Times of The Six Cities
The Latest and Greatest Mobster Events
Engagements
Tricky_Dicky has done it again. Been tricky with his dick? Why, yes, of course, he still hasn't decided which way it swings. That's not what I'm getting at here. He's popped another ring pop on another lucky woman. You heard it here first folks, Tricky_Dicky and ClaryFray are getting married. If you thought ClaryFray and Simply_Sly were happily forever after then you've never seen Tricky_Dicky's ring pop. That thing will turn heads and change minds. The moment ClaryFray saw it she couldn't resist the trickster and his complex ways and ditched the simple sly. Sources say they are planning to have the wedding in the fall.
Births
Long time couple His and Hers brought a baby girl into the world last week. When they showed her off to friends and family she was dressed head to toe in the most adorable baby fashion by KHAOS and BadWolf SuitZ. The baby also wore a signature item which was a cape. The happy couple hope their new baby will grow up in the life of crime and become just as successful as they are. Sources say the baby's name is Theirs. What a perfect little family.
Personal Ads
F looking for M/F who will look past her broken wings and love her with all the chains and bondage in the world - contact pink if interested.
M looking for a sexy F who loves to dance with chicken wings too. - contact Camzilla if interested.
M looking for F who is just as well dressed as he is, maybe she could even become his muse for iGo Stitching company. - contact iGoBerserk if interested.
F looking for M to help her plant some pumpkins in her patch. - contact Pumpkins if interested.
M looking for a F who can handle his super saiyan. - contact Vegeta
Obits
hereforthebeer - Can't blame this guy for suiciding after he never found the beer... much like when you're watching an adult film and the girls never come. It's just a lot of guy on guy action, each stroke you wait for a female body and it never shows. Hopefully the next of kin comes back with a goal that is obtainable. It is the prohibition after all.
BGCHKR4NOCOMRADES - Another day, another suicide. What is going on people? Put down your razor blades and get out of the house. Either way, it's quite obvious this guy couldn't keep up with having a very loud name.
Johnnie-Boy - Always wanted to be a boy. When he was told he had to grow up and become a man he skipped town and the life of crime to run back to his mom's house and play with his toys in his old bedroom. Whenever there was a knock on his door he'd start screaming that he never wanted to grow up like a lunatic. Eventually the mob found him again and cut his throat for being disloyal and abandoning his true family.
People We Wish Were in the Obits
CASHMONEYMILLIONAIRE, GONJAQUEEN and SUPERFROG - This one should be pretty obvious.
Donbot - We are completely jealous of your awesome fable telling and we really want that lucky foot.
Built2Destroy - He's been sent to earth to end all existence. Taking him out first would be the smart thing for us to do. Better him than us.
*****
Everyone's About Oral
But Not the Good Kind
Opinion Piece by Reporter Kettle
The citizens are crying; crying for more oral. ...Not that kind of oral. Long time mafiosi of this world have known that the Streets have always belonged to those who seize them: the poets, the song writers, the story spinners and lesson teachers. They once were the center, the heart if you will, of our small world; naught a day would pass without something new, innovative and fresh being presented to the public... for good or bad. As our world expands we have seen the Streets become less of a focal point, less important for survival or recognition in our lifestyle. Some days it seems as if the pavement bleeds a slow, dreary, unoccupied death. Yet those poets and story tellers are... well, they are not going to let them die without a fight.
Currently VinceNoir, mobster and Right Hand Man to Chicago's Rayden, has made a call to arms about Street activity. Rather than mourn the days of ma and pa gone by, he has decided to take initiative and try a different tact on the matter. With a little ingenuity, the man has initiated the inception of something he has named "The Oral Republic". Acting as a council for the good and welfare of our beloved Streets, the people nominated (one lucky man or woman from each city) will help in encouraging the families of the five occupied cities to bring forward more activity, more speeches, more contests, and overall: more oral.
Having gained support, notice and recognition from a few well-known and respected leaders across the country, you would expect this project would be well past it's introductory phase and well into it's honeymoon. Sadly, the speech remains unnoticed, uncared for, and unworthy of review by any of the top-tier mafiosi.
That, ladies and gentlemen, is where the problem starts and stops. If the leaders do not care, then simply put, why should we?
Many of us can agree that we are in a different era than our mums and dads ever lived through, and yet we still hang on to many of the tenets they used to pave our way of life. Street activity has long been used as a set standard in everything from promotions, to authorization considerations, even at times the reason for a person's life or death. Even today, leaders have been overheard discussing the standards for a person's activity in the Streets as requirement for being in their crews or for loftier positions. So why don't the leaders care more?
Is it simply boredom? The opinion that they aren't here to provide endless entertainment? Or, as can be seen in most cases of normal every day mobsters, is it the dreaded monster known as fear? Understandably the Streets are an intimidating place to spend your time, what with sex rampant on every corner and people spouting drivel as you casually stroll by. However, by the time you have made your bones and taken the reigns of a family, and definitely by the time you seize control of an entire city, you should be over that sort of stage fright, correct?
Whatever the reason, it seems we are fortunate to have, based off the current activity of the Streets, the Godfathers of Philadelphia, New Orleans and New York who are averaging an appearance to the masses at least every two days throughout their career (based off of statistics tattooed to their nether regions, at least). Does this say they care? It most definitely is a start, and hopefully the Godfathers of those cities take the Oral Council's development seriously as they seem to still find value for the roads of our community.
The city heads of Chicago and Detroit, however, seem to either be stunned into silence by their own good fortune of having survived so long, or have merely been rendered mute in a game of cat's-got-your-tongue gone wrong. While, as previously established, the Streets are not the be-all end-all of our world anymore, it has often proven imperative for fledgling cities to prove themselves in every aspect of our business, not just in the gun games and cash-exchanging hands capacity. If anyone needs to severely look into the Oral Council, it is suggested that the men who make an appearance once a week do, or at least encourage and motivate their cities to do so on their behalves.
Whether the Oral Council proves to be good or bad remains to be seen, however, it needs to be given the proper attention to even get to that point. Tea Time encourages everyone to roll up their sleeves, contribute, and get this project going in whatever form it may launch in. In the end, everyone cares about our fair Streets in some capacity. Let's all do our best to ensure that it thrives for generations to come.
...That, or just hand the rights over to the Tea Time Editors. They'll make it pretty, no problem. (Vote CASHMONEYMILLIONAIRE and Katniss for your Oral Council representatives. This is a shameless self promotion. Live with it.)
*****
Buy Our Paper
Win Some Cash
Tea Time: Gen-X wants to be as socially conscious as their foremothers were, and one of the biggest things they enjoyed doing was giving back to the community in which they lived. Well ladies and gentlemen, you are our community, so listen up!
Anyone who purchases a copy of our paper (OOC: reads and comments upon it) will be entered into a random drawing for the following week. The prize? $100K! Two winners will be awarded weekly- and one of them could be you!
Our selected winners for this week are: Alexander and Vegeta! In addition to us being so super psyched about our first issue, we've randomly drawn a third winner (because we so crazy): WildTurkey! Congratulations, and remember to check your mailboxes for your check!
Ahhh, the sweet, sweet smell of free money. It could be yours, too! Just remember to purchase your copy of Tea Time: Gen-X whenever it hits the newsstands!
(And remember to tell us how much you love us. It doesn't hurt. It also doesn't help your chances of winning either.)
*****
SPEAK OUT! Answer Our Surveys
Because We *Love* What You Have to Say
The ladies over at Tea Time know that the voice of a community can only be as strong as that: the community! Every week we will be featuring three random survey questions over, well, just about any ol' subject in our fair world. As much as we would love to ask each and every single one of you individually what you think, it would help us out a lot if you could take the time to answer the questions for us on your own time! Simply fill out the attached leaflets, and we will do the rest!
Your answers will help us with bringing the freshest perspective of the community to the community in our following issue. And who knows- maybe your famous words themselves will be featured in an article!
So grab your pen, fill in our questionnaires, and we'll take it from there. And as always, thanks for helping to voice your opinion!
Weigh-in on Dueling!
Weigh-in on Street Activity
Weigh-in on Tributes
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Spill the Beans!
Care to Share?
I'm sure many of you wonder what makes a tabloid like this continue to run past a single issue. Well I will tell you how, kids: GOSSIP!
As the title states, we're asking whether or not you all would care to share. Heard anything interesting lately? Is there a Made Man out there worthy of notice? Is someone planning a coup? Did someone kill someone, and only you know about it? We need your gossip!
So, spill the beans! Leave the Editors at TT:GX a note with any information you may have heard, and if it's as newsworthy as we hope it will be, it could become a featured article in our next issue! Everything will be completely, 100% anonymous- all you have to do is pass it on and we'll take it from there.
Well, what are you waiting for? Share *Your* Gossip!
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Sometimes we work hard, and sometimes we don't work at all. That sometimes is more like a lot of the time. If you want to witness the genius behind Tea Time, join us in our offices (#ttgx). Stop by, share an idea, share a story, or simply listen to CASH, Bee and Kat yell at each other.
As always, any questions, comments or concerns are welcome, and can be sent addressed to the Tea Time Editors, c/o Katniss. |
