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| "A Sit Down With The Devil" Episode | Started by: Bossman_Marley on Dec 08, '08 13:34 |
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*curtains open* *Jamaican Satans stands their waving and blowing kisses* *music plays,"Owww..me so horny, ow owww....me so horny* *Jamaican Satan, dreadlocks in the shape of two horns* Hello mobstas and mobstaatts! Today we have a special guest. You all know him as BRIANROURKE!!! *crowd claps loudly* Come on out Brian! *BrianRourke comes out and takes a on the red sofa, all the Rourke's lined up on the first roll* *Jamaican Satan began his questioning* 1)Jamaican Satan-->How did you become a Rourke? As we see there are many walking the streets 2day? BrianRourke----->Unfortunately for the masses you can't just 'become' a Rourke. You're either born one or you're not. There's not changing your name later on in life as you just wouldn't have what it takes. It's a sad fact but nevertheless true. Even becoming a Rourke by proxy by marrying one of us (as Belma found out) isn't the sure fire way to happiness that you would expect. It's like Vampires. The more diluted the Rourke, the weaker they become. 2)Jamaican Satan--> Is it a Brotherhood, a cult, or a gang? BrianRourke------->The Rourkes are merely a group of associates who share a common name. The fact that we all hang around in a gang, share a common surname akin to brothers, and hold the same religious cult-like beliefs is neither here nor there. 3)Jamaican Satan-->How does it feel to be member of the only Godfather on these bloody streets as of late? BrianRourke------->It feels superb to be perfectly honest with you. One of my Grandfathers (too many greats to be bothered with included) was a part of Anitas family for a short while and they are believed to have enjoyed their time then as well. With it being such a small group within the HQ you get to know everyone rather well. Good times at Ridgemont High. 4)Jamaican Satan-->If you had one bullet and one shot. Would you kill a mugger or a rogue? BrianRourke----->Excellent question Bossman. One I have actually thought about before. To kill a rogue is a proud day. You've saved countless lives, made your family safer, and added a fine kill to you list. Plus the likelihood is that you've been chasing this rogue around for quite some time. So to finally end his/her life is an experience to be savoured and enjoyed. To kill a mugger however, is just plain hilarious. They've mugged you. They took a bit of money from you, and they ran off. So in return you've popped one off in their skull. It's the equivalent of someone knocking over a glass of water and splashing you a little, and your riposte being to drown them in a lake. So after the above working out I will give you my answer, and it oes as follows: For sheer pride it would always have to be the rogue. For quality high jinx and hilarity it will always be the mugger. 5)Jamaican Satan-->You say in your quote that back home you're a 20 cigerette a day man because you need one after sex. Since you're only a minute man, would it be outragous to say that you chain smoke? BrianRourke----->First of all I would like to say that 'Yes' I am a chain smoker. I would also like to address the accusation that I am a minute man by giving the following retort. There is absolutely nothing wrong with being a minute man. Sex is a race and there can be only one winner. You don't win Silver, you lose Gold. Think about it. 6)Jamaican Satan--> When I saw you and your brothers on that cold day in Wyoming burying your brother ArchieRourke. Where you really their to steal my marijuania patches I had going on the valley said?????????? BrianRourke----->Not at all, well I certainly wasn't. Archie was so so close to me I would never besmirch his memory by doing a job whilst mourning his loss. What my coincidentally named associates may have been up to is anyones guess. 7)Jamaican Satan-->If RonMexico is = to idiot, and Handiman = to snot, then Rourke is = to ____________? BrianRourke----->Sex. 8)Jamaican Satan-->How do you feel about the lastest rogues to walk the streets? BrianRourke----->I was a bit bored in all honesty. Rogues don't thrill me as much as they may have done in the past. There is no ellaborate damning speech anymore. No clever name. No hilarious pictures. (In my quite frankly expert opinion anyway). It is just a way for them to notch up a few more kills. I also lost a friend I'd rather not have done as a result of the rogue, so I'm rather angry about that. F U rogue. You F'ing C. 9)Jamaican Satan-->Which brother would you give a wedgy and which would be most likely to eat a booger? BrianRourke----->I think I'd quite like to give RourkeyRourke a 'wedgy'. He's got a bit cocky recently and needs to be brought down a few pegs. I imagine TelkinRourke would have been most likely to eat a booger however, as the guy was just plain crackers. RIP TelkinRourke. Gone but not forgotten. 10)Jamaican Satan-->Has Belma, your wife, made it to America yet? BrianRourke----->Due to the tragic loss of ArchieRourke I am considering shipping Belma out to Detroit (not in a pasenger ship obviously, in a cargo container I was thinking). Companionship is something I crave and to have lost someone so dear to my heart in Archie I will have to go with Second Choice Belma (as I like to call her). HELLO CUTIE 11)Jamaican Satan-->About this yoga thing!! Do you like the looseness of the exercise? Or just having your feet by your ears?? BrianRourke----->Yoga is a way for me to alleviate all the stress and pressure that I have accumulated during the day. The tantric exercises it allows me to utilise are bountifull and delicious. Should I ever choose them to give pleasure to a woman I'm sure they will enjoy it. The fact of the matter is though, that once you get married, whats the point? Why bother trying anymore? Belma needs to iron my shirts a little better (if I ever bring her over that is) before she gets a taste of the good stuff. And even then it will be under duress. Jamaican Satan--> BrianRourke I would like to thank you for being a guest on the first episode of "A Sit Down With The Devil". I hope that Belma makes it over and TelkinRourke ate that one last booger before his life ended. NEXT GUEST TO SIT DOWN WITH JAMAICAN SATAN WILL BE: HAYLEY crime boss of the FALLEN ANGELS a New Orleans based crime family.... *music plays and Dante jumps down from the announcers podium singing* "I'm a little tea pot, short, and stout! That buttons for HQ and this is how"* *pushes button and adds another fallen soul to the count* *Marley runs and hides hoping he liked the show* |
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Ireland starts to clap. "Wha I never thought the Rourkes thought about sex so much." |
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| Reply by: ireland_12 at Dec 08, '08 14:04 | |
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| Yes indeed. My friend I have come to learn more about the Rourke's than I needed to know. | |
| Reply by: Bossman_Marley at Dec 08, '08 14:12 | |
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| So you still got that marijuania patche? | |
| Reply by: ireland_12 at Dec 08, '08 14:15 | |
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*looks out the corner of his eye* Who's asking???? *picks up phone and calls cousin in Wyoming* |
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| Reply by: Bossman_Marley at Dec 08, '08 14:28 | |
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| Me | |
| Reply by: ireland_12 at Dec 08, '08 14:29 | |
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*hangs up phone* We'll I'll be damn! Someone stole the whole patche. Everything even the soil. *looks over at Ireland* |
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| Reply by: Bossman_Marley at Dec 08, '08 14:38 | |
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don't look at me Ireland takes out a joint and smokes it. |
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| Reply by: ireland_12 at Dec 08, '08 15:08 | |
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| That Brian Rourke. What a modern day American hero he is. Well done! | |
| Reply by: Marietta at Dec 08, '08 15:36 | |
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| Quite entertaing, keep it up | |
| Reply by: Luciano-Leggio at Dec 08, '08 18:48 | |
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Scarin claps Very nice job Marley! I have been awaiting this episode and you didn't disappoint. Can't wait for the next one! |
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| Reply by: Scarin at Dec 08, '08 19:44 | |
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holds his finger over "that" button and grins Not this time my friend, great job can't wait to see more. |
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| Reply by: Dante_Balboni at Dec 08, '08 21:26 | |
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hero stands and claps that was one great interview you have impressed me can't wait for the 2nd episode hope to impress us again I'll lite a joint to celebrate that amazing momment |
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| Reply by: Her0 at Dec 09, '08 02:53 | |
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Good work Bossman! An intriguing, if not slightly disturbing, insight into the mystery that is "rourkness". |
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| Reply by: MikeHunt at Dec 09, '08 04:07 | |
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A mystery far beyond the like of mankind. A mystery to go unsolved for a eternal lifetime. A mystery of suspense. I broke the story!!! *a loud roar of music sounds* *a deep voice announces* NEXT TO APPEAR ON "A Sit Down With The Devil" Episode 2. HAYLEY Chicago Boss and Leader of the Fallen Angels Crime Family!!! Stay tuned folks......... |
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| Reply by: Bossman_Marley at Dec 09, '08 19:22 | |
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