"I meant the WhereWasinski comment."

I understand you were replying to Kilgore's comment. I'm not concerned about what comment you are referring to when you said this:

Your name also appears to consist mostly of me.

But what name consists of you. When you say "Your name" it makes me think you are referring to Kilgore. If you had said "The name" I would think you were talking about WhereWasinski. Words are really amazing, just like magnets. 

So if you what you meant to say just then was "I meant the WhereWasinski name." Well, yes, WhereWasinski isn't an even split between the two names. Maybe you get your whole name in the relationship name because you have longer winded replies, sometimes even just replying to yourself. You should be proud of this, everyone knows all long winded replies are better than short ones. One just can't get a point across without writing a novel these days. 

So if you what you meant

"I couldn't agree more, they're really just amazing."

"And I'm quite glad to have what I assume is another sarcastic responder shortly after I said I'd leave for a while as long as my name wasn't brought up. Exactly what are you after with comments like these? As for the length of my comments, I respond with what I believe is needed to get my point across and cover all points. Sorry if you don't like that I don't choose to skip points in a logical discussion, but I really don't care."

Never mind my boss, old pal. She's just a bit off center today, because she's been dealing with that certain monthly visitor, if you know what I mean. Why a woman of her stature would continue to live in an apartment building with such a nosy and overbearing landlord, I'll never know. It's close to the water, she likes it.

Kilgore shrugs and gives a small shake of his head.

But in answer to your concern, the reason your adorable nickname contains more letters from yours is that it's actually pretty hard to stick you guys' names together in a way that flows. By all means, if you've got a better suggestion I'd love to hear it and pass it along to the rumor mill for a vote. I am, after all, just the messenger.

As for your other concern, if my comment made a near pass to a point you've made recently, feel free to chalk it up to biting topical commentary. But I must confess that I haven't really been paying attention while you've been speaking lately.

I know you must've had a hard life, old chum, and I don't claim to have any idea of the things you must've seen in your days that have plunged you into such a defensive crouch of self-preservation, but I assure you that not everything is a frontal assault on your well being. I know we live in a world where every day is but another tick mark on the final countdown until we inevitably eat a bullet, but everything isn't so deathly serious. You know what else can scrub you off the face of the planet in a moment's notice? High blood pressure, the truly silent killer.

Ease up a little and have a laugh. It could save your life. 

cant we all just get along? 

But in answer to your concern, the reason your adorable nickname contains more letters from yours is that it's actually pretty hard to stick you guys' names together in a way that flows. By all means, if you've got a better suggestion I'd love to hear it and pass it along to the rumor mill for a vote. I am, after all, just the messenger.

"The name WhereKuklinskiWas would probably roll off the tongue better should you choose to try to convince others we're in cahoots or a couple of some sorts. We're obviously not, so I don't care if you can convince some idiot that we are. Be careful who you say the messenger bit to, I'm not deeply offended but if I were and I were in the position to do so I am the type that kills the messenger. It shows the others that there is no half committing to something by just being the one to bring it forward."

As for your other concern, if my comment made a near pass to a point you've made recently, feel free to chalk it up to biting topical commentary. But I must confess that I haven't really been paying attention while you've been speaking lately.

"The entire discussion labeled Systematic Immolation of Thought is centered around people who choose to believe mass opinion and follow it killing thought by refusing to think on the subject and come up with their own opinion. You'll just have to take my word on that because I'm actually debating begging the Gods to remove it after so few have shown the ability to attempt to understand the material because of the given speaker and subject, and I'd rather not leave it for people of that nature to even possibly discover it further down the line."

I know you must've had a hard life, old chum, and I don't claim to have any idea of the things you must've seen in your days that have plunged you into such a defensive crouch of self-preservation, but I assure you that not everything is a frontal assault on your well being. I know we live in a world where every day is but another tick mark on the final countdown until we inevitably eat a bullet, but everything isn't so deathly serious. You know what else can scrub you off the face of the planet in a moment's notice? High blood pressure, the truly silent killer.

"Based on the number of people who've felt the need to come out and toss accusations my way, I apologize but I can't imagine not being defensive when so few have come out in my defense. I told the world to leave me be for a week or two so I could pull myself out of a defensive stance, so if you want me to lighten up or stop speaking for a while please just let me clear my mind and have a short spell of peace."

Kilgore takes a few thoughtless nips from his pocket flask as he hears WhereWasI out.

Okay. Perhaps I chose my words poorly. Not so much messenger per se, but public representative. That should do a bit better. But your bull-headed posturing is duly noted. Just note, in turn, that by my immediate summation you're not only the time to shoot the messenger, but also the type to make a mountain over a molehill, cry over spilled milk, and flip the chessboard when you find your queen in check.

I can assure you wholeheartedly that my original comment was a simple jest, holding no ill will, and dripping with enough sarcasm to send your dry cleaning bills through the roof. But I did, and still do, think it was funny, so I'll stand beside it and own it completely. You might do well to consider the same, instead of trying to strike your words from the history books and blame others for your own poor behavior.

Your apology is well accepted, my friend, but you can't let this world get you down. If you feel you need tpo take a much deserved breather from public discourse, trying to strike down every Joe that utters your name is not the way. You don't lay low by trolling through the streets, hiding behind lampposts, ready to spring out with a pocketful of vitriol and inferiority complexes anytime someone mentions you. If you need a time out, do it the right way-- lock yourself in your room, tell your mom you're doing your homework, and sing along to your favorite Ella Fitzgerald records. But don't try to push your emotional instability onto my shoulders.

I honestly couldn't care if you eased up or not. I thought it might be good for you, but I have no vested interest in it. You can go ahead and run around in your little spiral, defecating into your own trousers and feeling like a victim, I don't care. But might I suggest that perhaps, just a little bit, you might bring it on yourself?

Best wishes and best of luck.

Okay. Perhaps I chose my words poorly. Not so much messenger per se, but public representative. That should do a bit better. But your bull-headed posturing is duly noted. Just note, in turn, that by my immediate summation you're not only the time to shoot the messenger, but also the type to make a mountain over a molehill, cry over spilled milk, and flip the chessboard when you find your queen in check.

"It actually takes a lot to offend me, that's why I don't mind stating that if I actually were offended I'd go about that action. I apologize if you haven't heard that of my bloodline, but the comments of temper tantrums and uncontrolled anger in the face of the things I've yelled at my superiors for considering punishing another for throughout the history of my bloodline generally justify that I don't cry over spilled milk."

I can assure you wholeheartedly that my original comment was a simple jest, holding no ill will, and dripping with enough sarcasm to send your dry cleaning bills through the roof. But I did, and still do, think it was funny, so I'll stand beside it and own it completely. You might do well to consider the same, instead of trying to strike your words from the history books and blame others for your own poor behavior.

"I don't enjoy jokes from people who I don't really know, truth be told. So you can have your jokes and think they're funny, as is your right, but don't expect me to simply take being the butt of it, as is my right to express my dislike. I have done nothing I don't stand by to this day, none of my words should be stricken from the history books except for my best words. Quite frankly, the number of people who are proud to state they didn't read it makes me believe there aren't enough people worthy of those thoughts for it to be left in a public venue seeing as so much of the public is so proud to have never even attempted to understand the words."

Your apology is well accepted, my friend, but you can't let this world get you down. If you feel you need tpo take a much deserved breather from public discourse, trying to strike down every Joe that utters your name is not the way. You don't lay low by trolling through the streets, hiding behind lampposts, ready to spring out with a pocketful of vitriol and inferiority complexes anytime someone mentions you. If you need a time out, do it the right way-- lock yourself in your room, tell your mom you're doing your homework, and sing along to your favorite Ella Fitzgerald records. But don't try to push your emotional instability onto my shoulders.

"I haven't let this world get me down, it's only made me tired (OOC: I have a fever of 103 degrees and I can't afford to not go into work). I always have and always will make time to strike down thoughts of me without my permission because it is my name and I don't want thoughts that aren't my own to be applied to my name without my permission. Had you told me you wanted to make the joke I would've ask you make it much more over the top to the point it would've gotten you shot had I not been okay with it so that others would undoubtedly know it was a joke."

"I'm not trolling, I'm asking questions. I don't care about your emotions... at all. I think emotions are pointless to discuss because they have no logical value in a discussion and I'm not anyone's mother or therapist so it isn't my duty to listen to someone speak about them. I find it quite funny that so few keep bringing my emotions into this. Where? Where was I emotional? I choose to defend my name for a logical reason, to separate ideas I don't approve of from my name so that no one will accidentally link the two. There is no other purpose."

I honestly couldn't care if you eased up or not. I thought it might be good for you, but I have no vested interest in it. You can go ahead and run around in your little spiral, defecating into your own trousers and feeling like a victim, I don't care. But might I suggest that perhaps, just a little bit, you might bring it on yourself?

"I don't feel like a victim because a victim is helpless and I'm never helpless, I knew this would happen when I set my course. I had others who claimed to back me in the beginning and I defend my right to feel betrayed by the lack of support for my efforts. I intentionally brought a lot of this on myself to spark the streets, the inability of others to separate my thoughts from a false persona and see the driving point to think before you speak is not my problem."

"It actually takes a lot to offend me, that's why I don't mind stating that if I actually were offended I'd go about that action. I apologize if you haven't heard that of my bloodline, but the comments of temper tantrums and uncontrolled anger in the face of the things I've yelled at my superiors for considering punishing another for throughout the history of my bloodline generally justify that I don't cry over spilled milk."

WhereWasI sighs,

"Went back to change a line and did that horribly. I meant to say 'but the comments others have made elsewhere of temper tantrums and uncontrolled anger in the face of insults is in contradiction with the fact I've yelled at my superiors for considering punishing another for insulting me throughout the history of my bloodline. Obviously with this knowledge one should know I don't really cry over spilled milk, but you don't have to choose to believe it or give it much value.'"

So if you what you meant to say just then was "I meant the WhereWasinski name."

Tokyo sighs.

As I was stumbling around talking, I haven't fed in a few days, I made a mistake. What I meant to say was: So if what you meant to say just then was "I meant the WhereWasinski name." 

Tokyo sighs again.

Oh gosh, I'm sorry, I just said WhereWasI twice, three times without his permission. How illogical of me.

Tokyo goes back to stumbling around the streets looking for human flesh.

Oh, but aren't you quite helpless indeed? 

You're proving just now that you're too helpless to ignore meaningless comments and going about your business, taking the break that you claim you so sorely need.

You're too helpless to realize that you're a public figure in our line of business, and that comments will be made, good or bad, and that no one is contractually beholden to confer with you before voicing their personal opinions. I'm certainly not going to ask your permission to tell a joke. I'm damn sure not going to take your notes on said joke. But yes, if you choose to take umbrage to every instance of your name passing the lips of bystanders, that's your kicking-and-screaming prerogative, and I will not stand in your way.

However, if you can't stand the idea of your name being uttered without explicit permission, dissenting viewpoints, and being expected to use common sense, then you're simply not qualified to do your job. Trying to micro manage public perception will get you nowhere. You've lamented yourself that nobody likes you, and that's a direct result of your attitude. There's no shame in admitting that you can't handle scrutiny. But if that is truly the case, the only honorable recourse is to resign your position or learn to keep your mouth shut when nothing good can come of it.

"The purpose of that comment was because you were improperly speaking whilst criticizing me for improperly speaking. Grammar mistakes happen, there's no need to go at them more than just a clarification of what was actually meant."

"You're directly addressing me, and once again I don't care if others disapprove of my stance. It is my own and I choose to take it for my own purpose. Get used to it, because unless you can logically break down why I shouldn't in a way I agree with it'll keep happening."

WhereWasI turns to Kilgore,

Oh, but aren't you quite helpless indeed? 

You're proving just now that you're too helpless to ignore meaningless comments and going about your business, taking the break that you claim you so sorely need.

"I choose to take these on, if I want to stop I will. No one has to let me off the hook, you could all bury me in responses with a similar effort to what I openly did to Kuku- if you so wish."

You're too helpless to realize that you're a public figure in our line of business, and that comments will be made, good or bad, and that no one is contractually beholden to confer with you before voicing their personal opinions. I'm certainly not going to ask your permission to tell a joke. I'm damn sure not going to take your notes on said joke. But yes, if you choose to take umbrage to every instance of your name passing the lips of bystanders, that's your kicking-and-screaming prerogative, and I will not stand in your way.

"I'm a public figure... why? More importantly, why should I care that I am if I am? No one is contractually obligated but they can be guaranteed to get a visit from me in what will be most likely a critical manner should they choose to do so. How is it a kicking-and-screaming prerogative? Where was I kicking or screaming? Where was I illogically upset?"

However, if you can't stand the idea of your name being uttered without explicit permission, dissenting viewpoints, and being expected to use common sense, then you're simply not qualified to do your job. Trying to micro manage public perception will get you nowhere. You've lamented yourself that nobody likes you, and that's a direct result of your attitude. There's no shame in admitting that you can't handle scrutiny. But if that is truly the case, the only honorable recourse is to resign your position or learn to keep your mouth shut when nothing good can come of it.

"It is your opinion that micromanaging public opinion will get me no where, it is mine that it will get my exact points across in just the way I wish them to be expressed. I've lamented because so few have openly said it, I have plenty who like me and what I do... most of whom keep in touch because of my attitude. I'm unpleasant at first, but the bluntness really does open people's eyes and keep them coming back. I can handle scrutiny, I just don't care for it coming from those not in a position to do so. Who are you to me? What justifies your scrutiny? I'm my own biggest critic, and anyone who really knows me would tell you that. I feel that this line is expressed with some anger and a bit of a demand,"

But if that is truly the case, the only honorable recourse is to resign your position or learn to keep your mouth shut when nothing good can come of it.

"Mind if I ask why?"

I'm not to proud to admit when I've been bested. You do have an excellent point. Why SHOULD you care? Even though you're a direct representative of your boss and your family as a whole, there's no real need to put any weight behind that, if no one really seems to care that you're a walking PR blunder and no one pays attention to you. Especially when you're so adamant at bogging down those that do take your public affairs seriously with tireless bickering and nay saying.

But if it's so cut and dried that you don't give a shit about what people think about you and how you conduct yourself in public as an official surrogate for your boss and representative of your Godfather, then why do you care so much what they're saying?

While I'm in the process of admitting my wrongness, let me add that your suggestion of WhereKuklinskiWas has indeed surpassed WhereWasinski in the polls by a hefty margin. Though, the late entry WhereKukWasinski is currently sweeping the votes and poised for a clear and easy victory if current trends hold out.

if no one really seems to care that you're a walking PR blunder and no one pays attention to you.

"Alright, what makes me a walking PR blunder? Can you prove that or is it just pointless slander?"

Especially when you're so adamant at bogging down those that do take your public affairs seriously with tireless bickering and nay saying.

"Which statements are just nay saying? What qualifies a statement as just nay saying? I could've sworn I've made a massive effort to put thought into almost every statement."

But if it's so cut and dried that you don't give a shit about what people think about you and how you conduct yourself in public as an official surrogate for your boss and representative of your Godfather, then why do you care so much what they're saying?

"Finally, a question I was hoping to see. I care about the results that might come from said statement should it go without response. I don't care about anything but the impression the words themselves leave. If I believe the results could have a negative opinion I will express the opinion I want to be expressed. If that opinion ever disturbs business, I'll simply be removed from my position as expected."

While I'm in the process of admitting my wrongness, let me add that your suggestion of WhereKuklinskiWas has indeed surpassed WhereWasinski in the polls by a hefty margin. Though, the late entry WhereKukWasinski is currently sweeping the votes and poised for a clear and easy victory if current trends hold out.

"While you're in the process of being sarcastic, I don't care about your poles because, guess what, I don't care about public opinion. I only care about the logical thinking behind individual well thought opinions. Also, why would you initiate that pole about me without informing me? I can't think of any reasonable answers for a person who is also a RHM to do so and I'd like to think you have a good intention and it's not just to poke at another person's reputation which was my initial assumption."

I'll be honest, my interest in you is fading quickly. I never claimed that I initiated any poll, and indeed I did not. I merely updated you on the current findings. Unfortunately, due to your total inability to take a joke and/or not be a totally insufferable bore, they're now calling us WhereWilgore.

Goddamn it.

If you can't see how constant twatting about and spewing passive-aggressive venom in every direction for absolutely no reason what soever is generally considered a dramatic miscarriage of public relations, it's not really my place to teach you. It's also not slander. It's commentary.

Telling everyone that you're the illegitimate child of a hermaphroditic goat, with all the higher-brain functions of a three day old bagel would be slander. 

Pointing out your social ineptitude is commentary.

I can absolutely understand and respect your incredibly edgy stance of not caring about public opinion. You know why? Because neither do I. That fake poll I mentioned, that you cared so little about that it prodded you out to the streets to blabber on forever about how much you didn't care about it? It doesn't exist. That's how fake polls work, turns out. What's more, I don't even care about your not caring.

See? We're livin' out there on that edge together, bud. That's probably why they're smashing our names together into sickeningly adorable nicknames.

"I thought you were poling the rumor mill, is that no longer poling? My apologies, must've mistaken poling the rumor mill for poling with a point."

If you can't see how constant twatting about and spewing passive-aggressive venom in every direction for absolutely no reason what soever is generally considered a dramatic miscarriage of public relations, it's not really my place to teach you. It's also not slander. It's commentary.

"What am I doing that proves any of that? Point it out if it's not slander, the action or crime of making a false spoken statement damaging to a person's reputation. You can prove that you're not lying by simply showing how I'm doing any of that. If you can't prove it... it's slander by definition."

Telling everyone that you're the illegitimate child of a hermaphroditic goat, with all the higher-brain functions of a three day old bagel would be slander. 

"It would be, but it would be much less effective because far fewer would believe you without evidence."

Pointing out your social ineptitude is commentary.

"If it's so obvious, then just point it out. Prove it's social ineptitude. If not, stop bringing it up."

I can absolutely understand and respect your incredibly edgy stance of not caring about public opinion. You know why? Because neither do I. That fake poll I mentioned, that you cared so little about that it prodded you out to the streets to blabber on forever about how much you didn't care about it? It doesn't exist. That's how fake polls work, turns out. What's more, I don't even care about your not caring.

"Your mention of my name brought me here. I stayed because you continued to improperly link my name to ideas that aren't my own."

"And no one should care about the opinion of another, so glad you can at least partially see that if not fully."

See? We're livin' out there on that edge together, bud. That's probably why they're smashing our names together into sickeningly adorable nicknames.

"If it's made up... then you're mashing our names together. Please don't, I'd ask why, but I don't care. So I'll say if you want to avoid me asking why, just don't."

Nope. Still not slander. In fact, I could call you mean names all day long and none of that, no matter how mocking a voice I used, would ever cross the line into slander. Ever. Because the first amendment to the Constitution allows for a thing called fair commentary. Sound familiar?

That's what every one of my statements would fall under in civil court. Because I've said nothing about you that wasn't already a matter of public knowledge. No, it's not a fact that you leave a bit to be desired, it's my personal opinion. Which is the entire point. Fair commentary. Welcome to America, it's quite nice in the springtime.

You repeatedly ask me to point out specifics in regards to your shortcomings. Fine, here goes:

There was that one time you took to the streets to try to stomp down an insignificant lighthearted comment that bore no real consequence against your livelihood, public image, or well being. You then continued to bludgeon that expired clydesdale far beyond the point of reason until you ultimately found yourself throwing around accusations under a legal statute that you don't fully understand.

Kilgore sighs.

It was never my intention to come out here and make you look bad. Really, it wasn't. This is the first time I can remember that anyone has ever backed me into a corner where I had no choice but to say worse things about them than I had ever intended.

Credit where it's due. Bravo.

Mahri hears is walking down the streets looking for potential locations to open up his new shop. Suddenly he hears the word "spanking" in the distance. Chong always loves a good spanking. He walks towards the words to notice Wiggle giving a speech. Of course towards the end he realizes he wasn't lucky to receive a spanking. 

"Well ain't that some shit, spankings being given out and Chong-y isn't getting one."

He walks away disappointed and lights a blunt on the way back down the street to resume his search. 

But I did, and still do, think it was funny