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| Introducing a real MFer | Started by: Zombie_Nixon on Dec 29, '08 17:44 |
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A regal, nay, presidential figure steps up to a dais in a Las Vegas hotel. My fellow Americans, and our friends across the Atlantic, I am here to introduce one of the outstanding members of the Las Vegas community, a great citizen and a great American. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Mr_MFer. Applause fills the hotel ballroom. I can say several nice things about this man, but instead, I'll point out the obvious while poking fun at him. First and foremost, MFer is not a communist. He isn't a damned dirty hippie, either. Also, he is not a crook. And I am not a crook. People need to know whether or not their president is a crook, I am not a crook. MFer is not a crook. Pezz is a crook. Someone begins the slow clap and then stops. Ahem. Some will say that MFer is not the great American I say. Those people are communist hippie bastards. MFer is a decorated veteran, a wonderful cook, and he loves animals. If he has any fault, it's loving animals too much. Way too much. There was this time in New York, with a llama... Cricket chirp MFer is also... um, hold on, let me check my notes here... Damn it. Damn you and your left-wing communist hippie agenda. Well, I'm done. You won't have Richard Nixon to kick around anymore. Throws down his papers and walks off the dais, to silence. Walks back out, kicks over the podium, and walks off again. |
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yells out "I love my boss Mr_Fer he is amazing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" go boss!!!! |
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| Reply by: Octavian at Dec 29, '08 17:46 | |
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Rourkey casually saunters into the press conference. I have heard from a good authority that "MFer" in fact stands for "Man Fondler." By "good authority," I mean my testicles. |
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| Reply by: RourkeyRourke at Dec 29, '08 17:58 | |
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| Sorry Rourkey that was me standing in for Mr_Mfer. It is those damn sexy blue eyes I couldn't help myself. | |
| Reply by: Maris at Dec 29, '08 18:07 | |
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I thought Mr_MFer's hands felt a bit cold this time; he's usually so warm and inviting with those paws of his. Care to take a stroll with me down by the lagoon? I could introduce my testicles to other parts of you if you're interested. |
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| Reply by: RourkeyRourke at Dec 29, '08 18:12 | |
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| "The lagoon. Oooooooooohhhhhhhh" Maris squeals like a little girl "what fun" | |
| Reply by: Maris at Dec 29, '08 18:24 | |
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Wow, I just found this thread and it has already been debauched by Rourkey. He can't let me have anything nice. Also, in my defense, the llama was very drunk. |
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| Reply by: Mr_MFer at Dec 29, '08 19:26 | |
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Verily, I would admit that I have improved upon this already. My mere presence has made this more interesting than before. What is this rubbish about me not letting you have anything nice? I let you have a go at Maris after we were done at the lagoon! |
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| Reply by: RourkeyRourke at Dec 29, '08 19:53 | |
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| One day at this crime syndicate thing and you're already fondling animals of all shapes and sizes? Glances at Rourkey before turning back to MFer. Figures. You move way too fast, young man. Keep your hands to yourself. | |
| Reply by: Marietta at Dec 30, '08 18:12 | |
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