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| A Short Bus drives through | Started by: Brick_Pollitt on Jan 28, '09 12:30 |
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He parked the short bus in the middle of the street, reached for the handle to open the door, struggled, finally got it open, then stumbled out. He was oblivious to the cars honking and cursing him. He made his way to his usual street corner, crawled to the top of his soap box and began to speak. Good morning ladies and gentlemen. I've been told to bring my short bus to the cities. This is a reincarnation of a similar vehicle that my father's mother's father's mother's father originally drove through these same streets. Back then it was called the Tard Cart. I, however, am more politically correct than my father's mother's father's mother's father and so I have thoughtfully changed the name to the Short Bus. Now, we've had a recent escape, um, I mean "day trip" from the local institut...err, "adult school" and a few of our guests have gotten lost. I mean they've lost track of time and forgot where the bus was parked. He showed off his bus, old rusty gray. It was full of dents, pucks, marks and blood. He couldn't help it. He'd run over a couple of the tards, err "passengers" on his way through the cities. And, ladies and gentlemen, you're in luck. Not only am I the driver of the tard car...err, Short Bus, I'm also the original passenger. He adjusted the strap on his helmet and read from a list that only he could see. Okay, if I call your name. You should take a helmet and get on the bus. If your last name is Rourke, or your father's last name was Rourke. You should get on the bus. Good, it's great to see you all still have your helmets strapped on. And yeah, Button, that means you too. Don't think you can get away from us just by changing your last name and acting like a salty old man. If there is no space between your first name and your last name, yeah, get back on the bus. If your name is IAmTheGreatest, or any variation thereof, your day trip is over. Get on. And Grab your helmet. My own crewleader... Shakes his head as he hands Jimmy his helmet Too many midget parties for you. Back to the "school." flips the page on his imaginary list. If you can't decide if you're a ghost or phantom, dead or undead, an angel risen or fallen, yeah, you need to get on the bus. We've missed you back at the institu...school. If you've attained the rank of godfather/mother, you're the craziest of them all and need to get on the bus. Hands out the remaining helmets and waits for the rest of the passengers. Okay, feel free to give me your suggestions for anybody else that needs a ride back to school. And if you'd like us to take anybody in particular, there will be a monthly medi...erm, tuition bill you will receive in the mail. Our rates are reasonable and our guests hardly ever esca, um, take field trips. |
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Ruh? Points at himself questioningly. Roh... Smiles absently and wanders on. |
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| Reply by: Denver at Jan 28, '09 12:37 | |
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He straps on his helmet and races onto the bus, he runs to the back and saves a see for Marietta Only the cool kids sit in the back. Plus we can lick the windows! YES! Ive been on this bus before, prepare yourselves for the ride of your life as the driver is half blind. He see's Marietta entering the bus and waves to her to join him |
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| Reply by: JimmyTheLionHeart at Jan 28, '09 14:27 | |
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Helps Denver with his helmet, then toward a seat on the bus. Here you go. Watches Jimmy run by him toward the back of the bus. Now you see why I have to wash the windows on this thing so often. And I'm not half blind. I'm half blind in one eye. I can see perfectly fine with my glass one. |
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| Reply by: Brick_Pollitt at Jan 28, '09 15:12 | |
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Receives his helmet and plops down in a seat. He promptly drains his bladder onto the floor Where are we going today? I hope to the petting zoo!! I like pop-tarts!!!! Crosses his fingers and closes his eyes. He wants to be surprised when the bus stops at it's destination |
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| Reply by: PhatballzRourke at Jan 29, '09 11:02 | |
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You'll never take me alive. I'll have you dead within minutes. You hear me? Deader than a doornail in Detroit. Do you know who I am? That's right. I'm the owner of Rossi Clothing Distributors. Don't you friggin' touch me, you hear? YOU CANNOT TAKE ME ALIVE. Marietta slumps into the seat next to Jimmy with a snore one of Brick's 'happy friends' in white suits stabs a needle into her arm, sedating her immediately. |
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| Reply by: Marietta at Jan 29, '09 11:30 | |
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Ahhhh. Thanks guys. I couldn't stand to listen to that anymore. I have very sensitive hearing, you know. Brick turned on the engine and began to pull forward when he noticed Rourkey Rourke, his head and half his body out the window, his better half still in the bus. He heard Rourkey spouting off about some ridiculous marriage proposal and holding a few dollar bills in his hand. Oh no, he's having another one of his episodes. Children listen up and listen well. Schizophrenia is a very serious disorder. If you don't take your medications, this is what can happen to you. Thanks for listening to this public service announcement. He pulled Rourkey back into the bus and strapped on his seat belt. This one thinks he has three wives and loads of cash. What he has is three nipples and loads of crabs he got from the last time he escaped. Don't you worry though. Aside from the ocassional slaps to the side of his own head and ramblings in the street, he's harmless. |
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| Reply by: Brick_Pollitt at Jan 29, '09 17:29 | |
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I'd like to thank you, Mr Pollitt for taking these people on your bus and helping them out. I can only imagine the kind of impact you will give them back at "school". speaks to Rourkey very slowly, enunciating each syllable Everything will be okay. Don't you worry. Harvey pats his head |
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| Reply by: HarveyDent at Jan 29, '09 17:41 | |
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Duh dribble dribble dribble Stumbles to the very front of the bus |
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| Reply by: PostMan at Jan 30, '09 09:46 | |
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| Three Ball!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! | |
| Reply by: VinnyToupo at Jan 30, '09 15:48 | |
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