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Undead Inc. Realty and Construction Started by: Phantom-Ghost on Jan 28, '09 14:53
Phantom-Ghost walks out onto the wonderful streets followed by ProphetOfDeath, MyObsessionWithFire, and Phantom_BFN. The streets were wet, slush covered everything. Phantom-Ghost, awaiting the walk signal, begins crossing State Street. It was just after noon, the perfect time to unwrap his new business- a gift to the cities, as he called it.


Boss, watch the puddle there. MOWF pointed down at a puddle in the road.

Son of a bitch, PoD joked, next time let him step in it, I'll laugh my ass off. He lit a cigar and puffed it as pedestrians passed.

They approached the spot where speeches were given, some of the regulars were smoking by the soapbox. Phantom looked at his watch. A few more Undead Inc. members arrived to support the new business venture that was about to be unveiled. Among them were Figlio-di-Vinci, Tazz_J, and Da_Kurlzzz.


No time like the present. Phantom mumbled under his breath.


Excuse me everyone. I have an important announcement regarding a new business venture that Undead Inc. will be spearheading.


All too often I stroll to the empty and lackluster business district of Hayley and myself's wonderful city, I think to myself, what happened to this place? Now, I'm not saying there aren't a few stand out businesses that I frequent myself, but I can't help but wonder what it would be like if there were so many more. Businesses from goods to services. Yeah, that's the ticket.

Phantom lights a cigarette just as ProphetOfDeath finishes his, visibly tossing it down the sidewalk.


Well, I've come up with a solution that gets to the heart of what its all about, business. Money. Moolah. Dough.


I now present to you, the newest business in the line of Undead Incorporated's own:

Undead Incorporated: Realty and Construction


For a nominal fee, explained on the pamphlets my associates are handing out- Phantom double takes at Tazz_J and Da_Kurlzzz. He motions with his neck toward the pamphlets and they begin pass them out to the bystanders.


For a nominal fee, Undead Inc's talented architects will construct you your very own business district in this fine city of Chicago. Whether it be a straightforward bar, or a intricate smoke shop. Perhaps tattoo parlors are more your style and you just don't have the time to plan out the building and architecture on your lonesome. This is no longer a worry for you.


Allow me to make it 100% clear that all independent businesses are still welcome within Chicago, but there are added benefits of working with Undead Inc's advisers and workers directly to ensure quality.


Please take a look at your pamphlets and I will explain each point directly.

Phantom reads slowly..


Undead Inc. Realty and Construction

January 28th, 1939


Phantom_BFN and Phantom-Ghost


Undead Inc. Presents UIR&C


Upon opening [posting], the customer is required to use the title agreed on during discussions before and during construction of the building. Titles will include "Undead Inc's" before the name to enhance business, failure to do so will result in a breech of contract and the building will be repossessed or demolished. Owners will be punished under the fullest extend of the law.


Prices are as follows (50% of the final total is to be issued in Phantom-Ghost's name before construction begins. Upon sending this down-payment the customer agrees to pay the final price in full after completion):

-+- Base Price................................$300,000

(Includes sign [Title] and a building not exceeding 1000 square feet [words])

-+- Additional Square Footage................................$25,000 Minimum

(Most additionals will be taken on a case by case basis picking a price manageable by both parties)

-+- Emancipation Payment................................$500,000

(Payment can be made to remove all ties to Undead Inc, allowing buyer to remove "Undead Inc" from the name of the structure)

-+- Guaranteed Customers................................$5,000 / Visit

(Payment can be made to ensure customers [posts] in your establishment. Payments can be made at any time during ownership and visits will be made in the order they were received. May be bought in bulk up to 25)

-+- Liquor License................................$25,000

(In order to have a bar that serves alcohol built buy Undead Inc, you must pay a liquor license, figured into your total)


Undead Incorporated would like to stress that once you have paid for your business, we have no say in what is said inside it. We will not attempt to regulate your business outside of the rules set in place by payments and contract.


Undead Inc. offers a $100,000 bonus payment made in your name if your thread reaches 50 posts aside from "Guaranteed Customers" employed by Undead Incorporated.


If you would like to make an order please use the form below and mail to:

731 Plymouth Ct.

Chicago, IL

60605

C/O Phantom-Ghost

[Mail to Me]

Click to Mail

FORM TO USE:




Name Of Business: ____________________

Options (Check all that apply)

[] Exceeding 1000 Square Feet? [words]

[] Emancipation Payment?

[] Guaranteed Customers?

[] Liquor License?

Small explanation of your business to get us started: ____________

__________________________________________________________________





We will get back to you as soon as possible with your total, once half of which is paid we will begin work on your establishment.




Well, I guess that pretty much covers it. Phantom looks left and right at his respective hands as well as his partner Phantom_BFN who nods in approval.


Now taking requests and questions...

Phantom watches some people raise their hands and begin to speak.
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Yes people thats right, as a co-manager of every one of these fine organizations, I will be promising activity in each one of these businesses.


So with that said, COME ONE COME ALL! AND LETS HAVE A BEER!
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Brood finishes reading the paper he just got from Tazz_J


Looks like a good idea, I wish you good luck with your organization! Did anyone say beer?!
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Thank you for your kind words. :D


Any questions at all?
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After coming to, and stop the game of chase he has begun with a random squirrel, he approaches the masses.


Just so you all know, if Phantom-Ghost, or Phantom_BFN cannot be found, and you have a question about this business venture, feel free to approach me. Contrary to belief, I am a very approachable person, so please come to me if you have any questions.

MOWF then shakes PGs hand and goes off to find the squirrel.
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Louis Gato watches from a street corner, smoking away and smiling to himself, as ussual. He straightens his jacket and speaks up


"An interesting development, should make it compulsory, across the country, and grant heads of families the ability to grease some palms so they can manage the district and what's put there themselves. That'll clean up the business area's of our cities"
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walks by laughing at this scam these guys are doing Well if you wanna buy a business from me just ask and i'll do it for free. Walks off lighting up his pipe
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Phantom stands stunned at PotHeadBear.


Excuse me? If you'd like to run off and slander my business in your crowd of friends, so be it. But don't come to my announcement to disrespect something I've worked hard to get off the ground.

Phantom shakes his head in disgust.
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Tazz_J tosses his cigarette into the windy streets of Chicago and walks up to Phantom after handing out pamphlets for this outstanding business to the crowd.


Well man besides PotHeadBear, I think this business is a great idea and I also think that it will succeed well!

Discouraged with the attitude of PotHeadBear, Tazz_J pats Phantom on the back and walks off to hand out more pamphlets in hopes of turning this into a great business
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