My good people lend me your ear as I have something to get off my chest, a confession if you will. I know I can trust this fine community of respectable gangsters. Anyhow, it all started two weeks ago Friday......

After landing in the airport in Miami, the cool salt air was already taking my mind off the drugs i had been pushing, the numerous felonies and extortions I had committed... I just need to clear my mind a couple days, yous know what I'ma talking bout right? Anyhow, every thing was going great, till that Friday.

I was at the track having a few drinks and betting the ponys when I noticed that mother fucker that killed my cousin Paulie back in the old county, Sergio Smellafeeti. I wanted to walk over and stab him in his fucking neck right there. Instead I finished my drink and went to the bleachers, just outside where i could keep and eye on that prick. Anyhows, I cooled down and thought about it. IF I make a scene the family is sure to hear about it, and I am sure they wouldn't be pleased. So if I am to whack this fucker, it has to be neat and quite. Anyways, I wave the concierge over tell him i need a women, I need her now.

As I wait for my lady of the night, I try not to leer at this prick as not to bring attention to myself. It is tough to be inconspicous as I have my hand on my piece the entire time. Ah, here she is, she is pretty! Blonde hair, blue eyes and quite classy, says her name is Debra, I ask her to sit she sits. As I explain the plan to her, she can't take her eyes off the cash sitting in my lap. This is gonna be easier then i expected. I tell her to seduce Sirgio and escort him to the black caddy in the garage. I lie to her tell her I am a friend. I then tell my last instructions, drop this into his drink when he goes to the bathroom.

bout 2 hours later

Debra and Sergio are on their way thru the garage. They make their way to my strategically placed Cadillac over in the corner that appears to have a light fixture out, but actually I broke it when i parked the car here for my good friend Sergio. Anyways as Sergio gets to car that has the trunk open for some odd reason, I take a 36oz Louisville slugger and I swing for the fences, it was almost comical the way his body wilted like a wet spagetti noodle, but I kept my composser even as Debra was screaming her head off. I fold Sergios leg in the car and I grab Debra and give her a smack across the face. DEBRA! DEBRA!! You are a part of this, I tell her. You are a part of this just as much as I am. You do the same time as I do! Now pull it together and get in the car. She does as shes told.

It was only 15 mins down the road to the docks, I knew I could get a boat there. During the drive all I could think about was I hoped that fuck was still alive cause I wanted him to know who was ending him. I wanted him to see my face!

Ah ha, here's one, it's perfect.

Debra still wimpering, I tell her to grab Sergios legs and stop the fucking crying. I tell her she is getting on my nerves. Anyhow, we get to the boat and it doesn't take me long to remember how to hot wire the ignition.. Debra still cries. It's really starting to piss me off. It takes just 45 minutes to get past the keys just south of a popular shark sighting spot a recreational scubba diver was telling as we were landing in Miami day before.

Good! He's still got a pulse. It only took a couple slaps to get Sergio awake. His eyes were still pretty glossy and he appeared to be out of it, but I know he recognized me as I pulled out my nickel plated 45 and splattered his brains all over the place. Even some brain matter on Debra, who had pissed herself and began screaming again. That didn't last long. I had planned on killing her as I couldn't have any crazy whore running her mouth, but due to the headache she had given me, it was quite pleasing to off that bitch. Know what I mean! Anyhow, I put some additional cuts on the bodies, and dumped them into the water. IT WAS AMAZING the amount of sharks that came. It was quite a feeding frenzy. Anyways, I torched the boat and caught the red eye home. Although my vacation was not real relaxing, it was VERY PLEASING!!

Ah, that feels great to get that off my chest, and I appreciate you hearing me out!

I puff on my cigar and look around the room as other gangsters begin telling their own stories of midnight boat rides or late night rides to the desert. It is great to get this stuff off your chest!!

Good story my man and great you got even with that prick

*takes drag off cigar*

Thanks Svend, I appreciate it my friend!  I know you would have disappeared that fucker too.

Really great story "36oz Louisville slugger and I swing for the fences", I love that part.

That bat has served me well over the past few years! ;)

Remembers that freezer bags arent invited yet and so he hands STITCH a brown bag filled with weed.

 There yah go bro!

lmao

*STITCH smokes the 30s bud* :P

Hey dont be stingy!

Reaches for the blunt STITCH had rolled