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Don Buttons - A lighter look at Mafia Life Started by: Butterfingers on Aug 10, '15 13:08

"Merrow, CHEF! Come out here!" Don Buttons hissed with his head in his food bowl.

From around the dark corner an older man, in his 50's, came out with his head down addressing the Don.
"Y-Y-Yes Don."

"What kind of food is this?" Don Buttons said as he swatted his bowl towards the man's direction. "Merrow, what do I pay you for?"

"Sorry Don, I-I-I just thought I would give you something different." He said. His eyes stayed fixed on the ground. He knew he would never win a staredown with a kitty, much less the Don.

"Dry food. Dry food? Really? You shape the damn things like fish and you think I'll like it?" Buttons hissed.

"Sorry sir but I heard other cats like it." 

"MERRRROW." The Don licked the inside parts of his whiskers. "Do I look like other kitties? I'm the Don! Now go back there and make me some real food! None of that dry stuff! It has to be like fresh fish or diced liver! Do that again and I'll claw you and your families ankles!"

"Y-Y-Yes Don. Thank you Don. Sorry Don." The chef said as he ran back to the kitchen.

Don Buttons walked over to his favorite kitty bed in the center of the room.

Two bodyguards stood on both sides. He looked over to one of them and said, "Ball of wool...now!" The bodyguard didn't say a word. He reached into his coat pocket and brought out the ball of wool.

"Meerrrow." Don Buttons walked over to him with his eyes fully opened. "Just don't roll it at my favorite couch, I paid alot for that couch and I don't want to scratch it!"

"Yes Don." The bodyguard said.

The ball of wool rolled passed, just inches from the Don's paws. He got into his pounce position and looked at it with his full attention. WIthin an instant, he pounced over to the direction it rolled, but it was gone. It was rolling over towards the nearby wall. He looked over at the wall and made a dash for it. He went to swat at it but he was too late as the ball of wool had hit the wall and rolled off in another direction. Don got into pounce position again, tail flicking back and forth, ready to jump. He bent his back paws and fixated on it. Right when he was about to jump a ring from a phone shrieked out from the corner table, shattering the Don's concentration. Don Buttons looked over at the bodyguard, the fur on his neck standing up, his tail now fluffy; the phone ruined his concentration.

The bodyguard answered the phone. "Hello. Yeah? He's here? Benny's here? Yeah the Don wants to see him. Let him in." The guard put the phone down and turned to the Don. "Don Buttons, Benny is here to discuss his tributes."

"Oh he's here. Merrow. Good." He walked back over to the center of the room standing over his kitty bed. The front door opened wide and a big burly man walked into the room. He was at least 6 foot 3. His hair was slicked back and he wore a suit that must have been worth in the thousands. Don Buttons noticed sweat on forehead.

Don Buttons began purring. "Sit!"

"Y-Y-Yes my Don." Benny walked over to the chair which was across from the kitty bed.

"So Benny. Merrow." The Don said as he walked over to Benny. "I did some checking and your tributes are low. Purrrr."

"Don. I know, Don. Just hear me out! It's just that I wa-"

"HISSSSSSSS! Silence!" Don hissed.

"Sorry Don. I'm sorry."

The Don, walked over to Benny's ankles and began to purr again. He pressed his head against his ankles multiple times. "Now Benny. Do you know what happens when people, merrrow, don't bring me good tributes?"

"Uh, no Don. I don't. I just started working here." Benny said. His sweat was more profuse on his head and was now noticeable in his armpits.

"Wellllll…" The Don said. He jumped up on his shoulders and pressed his head against his cheekbone. "Benny. Let me ask you a question." Benny sat quietly. "What does it mean when a cat rubs his head against a human?"

Benny got nervous. Was it a trick question? "Uh, Don. I thought it meant that the cat was showing affection towards the human."

"You see, purrrr. That's what you stupid humans always get wrong." The Don jumped over to the man's other shoulder and rubbed his head against his other cheekbone. "You think we do everything for love. You see, when we do this…"

He paused.

"IT MEANS I'M SAYING YOU'RE MY TERRITORY AND I OWN YOU!" The Don dug his claws into the mans neck and shoulder.

One of the bodyguards chuckled as Benny let out a cry of fear. "S-S-Sorry Don. It won't happen again." He wiped the sweat off his forehead daring to never look the Don in the eyes.

"Good. Merrow. Now get out of here." He said as he jumped off the man's shoulders and walked over to his kitty bed.

"NOW GET OUT! Hisssss!"

"Yes Don. Thank you for giving me another chance Don." Benny got up from his chair. Sweat was making it's way through his dress shirt which was now ruined by the holes made from the Don's claws. He made his way out and the door closed behind him.

"Good." The Don said as he reached over and licked his privates. "Now who's next?"

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