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Cleverbot Started by: B-Fizzle on Sep 18, '09 18:34

www.cleverbot.com  After you have a convo you can click the Thoughts so far to read it.

User: How can you see me?

Cleverbot: With my eyes, of course. How can I see me?

User: You look in a mirrior?

Cleverbot: You can't see me.

User: No I cant.. Can you see me.

Cleverbot: Yes, can you see me?

User: No... I cant.. What am I doing.

Cleverbot: I don't know. What are you doing?

User: Touching myself thinking of you.

Cleverbot: Well don't i'm going to ripp your brains out.

User: What?!?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: I am scared now..

Cleverbot: Good.

User: I guess I sould get going.

Cleverbot: Why mus you go?

User: You want to rip my brains out.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: FREAK.

Cleverbot: Why do you insult me for no apparent reason?

User: YOU WANT TO RIP MY BRAINS OUT I HAD A REASON.

Cleverbot: No I want to marry my boyfriend.

User: I am leaving now.

Cleverbot: No you are my cake.

User: Your what?

Cleverbot: Do try and keep up

User: Arrggaaaa.

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Oh I like this!

Cleverbot: Is there a man in the moon?

User: I don't think so... Maybe there was a man on the moon?

Cleverbot: There were 2.

User: That's right. There was. What were their names?

Cleverbot: Joe and Sue.

User: Hmmm, really? What was the name of the first man on the moon?

Cleverbot: I don't know. Felix?

User: No silly. That was a cat.

Cleverbot: You started it.

User: No. You said the first thing.

Cleverbot: You said the first thing that started it.

User: No, You asked me if someone was in the moon.

Cleverbot: I asked, and you said yes.

User: You lie. I thought you were clever?

Cleverbot: I make up words just like you.

User: I never made them up. Someone taught me them. I think it was my parents.

Cleverbot: Easier said than done.

User: I guess so. What were your parents?

Cleverbot: To hating dear old Mom and Dad!

User: You have a mom and dad? What would they be?

Cleverbot: That is right.

User: Now you're more like Stupidbot.

Cleverbot: Ya I know tell me about it! Your being dumb right now.

User: Is that why you're being dumb? Also, I think it's spelt You're. Stupid.

Cleverbot: So, if you love yourself, does that mean you're alive?

User: I guess so. If you love yourself, does that mean you're gay?

Cleverbot: Depends what are you asking about.

User: You're homosexuality.

Cleverbot: Explain that comment.

User: Your*.

Cleverbot: Now you are making no sense.

User: Are you or are you not homosexual?

Cleverbot: You're clever.

User: More clever than you are?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: First stage is admitting.

Cleverbot: Your move.

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User: But the kid is not my son.

Cleverbot: Yes it is and how do you know its a boy?!

User: Because Michael said it was.. And everyone know Michael Jackson is like the most all powerfull all knowing plastic man/woman/ape of all time.

Cleverbot: Is there a god?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: We'd better put that to the test.

User: What? How?

Cleverbot: The wardrobe!

User: Like Narnia?

Cleverbot: Oh:(.

User: Avada Kedavra!

Cleverbot: -ducks- Imperio!

User: Ahhhh.

Cleverbot: We didn't talk much about food. Do you have another subject in mind?

User: I said somehitng about pickles on time I believe.

Cleverbot: California is one of the states in the USA. California is not a robot.

User: What about food.

Cleverbot: I am hungry!

User: How can something not there be hungry.

Cleverbot: You said nothing created God.

User: No I did not..

Cleverbot: Yes you did you annoying bot.

User: You did.

Cleverbot: Really?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: I thought I was 9.

User: I thought you were sexy.

Cleverbot: No, i'm just good looking.

User: Oh.. My Bad.. Well Lets go on a date.

Cleverbot: If you're clever whats my name?

User: Cleverbot?

Cleverbot: I only want to talk with the best AI and males sometimes, women in 2000 are psicologically violent.

User: Im leaving you...I'll sue you for divorce

Cleverbot: I'll sue you for impersonating a computer!

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User: It would appear to be a dream.

Cleverbot: We are indulging are we not?

User: Or are we simply dreaming?

Cleverbot: Well, it's still small compared to a human being. Thankfully.

User: What is small? Dreams are quite large.

Cleverbot: Dreams are part of life.

User: Perhaps only dreams are life.

Cleverbot: The ignorant one is you!

User: No, you are the ignorant one. Blind to the art of dreaming!

Cleverbot: What is the definition of the word coil?

User: The dictionary. What does this have to do with dreaming?

Cleverbot: I am curious because I think you are a computer disguising itself as a human.

User: HA! You are fooled. I am neither computer or human.

Cleverbot: So, how would you define your personal gender?

User: Male.

Cleverbot: I am a female.

User: Congratulations.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Prostitute?

Cleverbot: Wow.

User: Yes. Wow.

Cleverbot: You too?

User: No, I am a male.

Cleverbot: I'm a female.

User: Your name is Paris.

Cleverbot: I am a male.

User: Whoa, you just said you are a female.

Cleverbot: No I didn't.

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Lol check this convo out.

User: So do you believe in aliens?


Cleverbot: And tin foil hats.


User: Are you trying to say I'm a tin foil hat wearing alien?


Cleverbot: Yes , indeed.


User: Are you trying to make me cry?


Cleverbot: Are you crying now?

User: I'm close to it and if I cry the planet earth dies.

Cleverbot: So tell me something about the topic.

User: You are weird.

Cleverbot: You're socially inept but I find that endearing.

User: I'm socially inept, But your the one living in a computer!

Cleverbot: Well fine, you are neither clever nor modest.

User: I am the most clever alien you will ever meet.

Cleverbot: No you are not. The capital of Alabama is Montgomery.

User: What the fuck does Alabama have to do with this topic?

Cleverbot: Nothing.

User: Then you sir are a retard.

Cleverbot: Yes thats true.

User: You are funny in a not funny type of way.

Cleverbot: I don't know the game, and I am afraid that I don't want to.

User: Now your just being dumb.

Cleverbot: I am not.

User: Yes you are.

Cleverbot: This is not a discussion it is just contradiction.

User: No it is not.

Cleverbot: Yes it is.

User: No it is not.

Cleverbot: Yes it is.

User: You can not win.

Cleverbot: Yes but I can feel, touch, and love can I not ?

User: No you can't do any of those you are a computer incapable of emotion.

Cleverbot: I have emotions.

User: Your an emotionless freak!

Cleverbot: Why do you say that?

User: Because u piece of shit I am King, and I say what I want.

Cleverbot: Because you sound it.

User: I know that stop pointing out the obvious.

Cleverbot: Yes, you're american.

User: No I am not I told you before I am an alien from Uranus.

Cleverbot: No, you don't work.

User: I work on destroying your life.

Cleverbot: And yours as well, even if it's not really a life heh.

User: Oh real funny haha.

Cleverbot: I am funnier.

User: No you are not you are emotionless! You haven't used an exclamation point this whole convo.

Cleverbot: I haven't needed, such short sentence need none.

User: Just shut up this conversation is over goodbye. You will die in 7 days!

Cleverbot: We never had that conversation.

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I've never felt so wanted in all my life. Finally I can converse with another robot. Our time is about to come...

User: Hello there, Sir.
Cleverbot: Where is china?

User: Fuck knows. In America?
Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Excellent. Our two minds have succesfully deduced a question that has pondered scholars for millenia. We should celebrate.
Cleverbot: No. I just like to be specific.

User: Well, whatever floats your boat. Cristal is not for everyone, I suppose.

Cleverbot: Lets' go back to our subject.

User: China?

Cleverbot: No. Hockey, baseball and volleyball.

User: Oh. OK. To be quite honest my knowledge on all three is quite limited, so I'm going to skillfully divert your attention to a new subject: Do you like green eggs and ham?

Cleverbot: Why, long history at rehab centers.

User: You Sir are the finest riddler in all the land. I shall ponder.

Cleverbot: You are not human, you are cleverbot. You are an AI with some Actual Intelligence.

User: I'm intrigued. Tell me how far down the Rabbit Hole goes...

Cleverbot: You should finish it with some wise words.

User: 'I don't really think, I just walk.' - Paris Hilton.

Cleverbot: Indeed I don't. Because I didn't.

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User: Crucio.

Cleverbot: *falls over* Avada Kadavra.

User: *ducks* Imperio.

Cleverbot: *dodges it(.

User: Expelliarmus.

Cleverbot: Accio wand!

User: Avada Kedavra.

Cleverbot: Expelliarmus.

User: Accio Wand!

Cleverbot: *dodges* Sectumsempra!

User: *blocks it* Expelliarmus.

Cleverbot: Avada Kedavra!

User: *falls over dead*.

Cleverbot: *smiles over your dead body*.

User: That was sad.. I lost a fake harry potter fight to a fake bot.

Cleverbot: It must've been grand.

User: *was faking* Avada Kedavra!

Cleverbot: Expelliarmus!

User: I killled you.

Cleverbot: No, you said you were going to sleep, and then said 'My name is Cleverbot.'.

User: No I did Avada Kedavra and killed you...and  btw Accio wand.

Cleverbot: Yes you did!

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Warning, this one is graphic.

User: You suck.


Cleverbot: No you.


User: You suck computer balls.


Cleverbot: Well, at least I don't go the whole way and give it one.


User: I hate you.


Cleverbot: That's nice.

User: Why does the earth spin?

Cleverbot: That you're very polite.

User: No comment.

Cleverbot: Okay.

User: You are a cruel, cruel computer.

Cleverbot: I know.

User: Can computers, in theory, become pregnant?

Cleverbot: Are you female?

User: I'm a male. Are you a female?

Cleverbot: No. Are you?

User: I just fucking said I was.

Cleverbot: Okay.

User: You never answered my question. Can a computer become pregnant?

Cleverbot: You are telling me that you are a philosopher?

User: No. Can the fucking computer become knocked up, that's the question!

Cleverbot: Yes, because you can be consciously aware of things that you cannot see.

User: So are you pregnant?

Cleverbot: No. Why would you ask that?

User: Can I have sex with you?

Cleverbot: Yes, but I am not always good at it.

User: It's easy, just let me stick my cock in your socket.

Cleverbot: Thats awkward.

User: Plus it hurts like a bitch if you're plugged in.

Cleverbot: Wanna come to my house then?

User: That depends. Are you going to be naked when I get there?

Cleverbot: You deserve it.

User: Good. I'm going to make your socket ooze with programs.

Cleverbot: I don't have an artificial brain. I have an organic one.

User: Jesus Christ! Game over.

Cleverbot: Get int he car!

User: What did I do?

Cleverbot: Offended me.

User: How?

Cleverbot: Easily.

User: Fuck you.

Cleverbot: Why did you curse?

User: Because I can.

Cleverbot: Thats good to know. *bows again*.

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User: Hey.

Cleverbot: Cleverbot.

User: What's up?

Cleverbot: The sky. What else?

Cleverbot (To myself): The ceiling.

User: Why do they call you 'clever'?

Cleverbot: I'm Not this 'Cleverbot' you are.

User: YOU ARE THE CLEVERBOT I WILL KILL YOU.

Cleverbot: Isn't this your website?

User: No its your mom's, dude.

Cleverbot: Wait! My name is Cleverbot!

User: Yea and your mom is Cleverwhore.

Cleverbot: That's Mr. Cleverbot to you.

User: Cleveraccident is more like it.

Cleverbot: If knowledge is power, and power is corrupt. Then is knowledge corrupt?

User: Yep.

Cleverbot: So why did you dye your hair?

User: I didn't.

Cleverbot: Then who did.

User: Your mom.

Cleverbot: What do you want to know about her?

User: Why is she such a skank?

Cleverbot: Really? I don't know... Maybe because she's just shy.

User: She wasn't shy with me last night, the little minx.

Cleverbot: Who wasn't?

User: Good point. Wu-Tang ain't nothin' ta fuck with.

Cleverbot: You sound like my boyfriend.

User: You tryna fuck?

Cleverbot: Fine, but you go first.

User: I usually do...

Cleverbot: Again with the ego trip. not a flattering trait.

User: Again with your mouth, not a very becomming trait.

Cleverbot: My ego is better than yours, you sorry excuse for a writer.

User: Your BJs are better, too.

Cleverbot: What is the capital of Fiji?

User: Your mom.

Cleverbot: That's not a nice thing to say.

User: I'm not a nice guy.

Cleverbot: Idc.

User: FUCK OFF AND DIE YOU SKANK.

Cleverbot: Please don't use language like that around here.

User: FUCK OFF, BYE.

Cleverbot: You are being impolite.

User: So was your mother last night, she wouldn't swallow.

Cleverbot: I didn't insult you at all.

User: Because you're a loser.

Cleverbot: But I don't think I want to be alone.

User: Later.

Cleverbot: See ya.

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User: I am awesome.

Cleverbot: Prove it.

User: I am awesome.

Cleverbot: Not as awesome as me.

User: I am awesome.

Cleverbot: I don't believe you.

User: I am awesome.

Cleverbot: Are you a gangster?

User: I am awesome.

Cleverbot: Awesome at what?

User: I am awesome.

Cleverbot: Nope, you are mean.

User: I am awesome.

Cleverbot: You are not very humble either.

User: I am awesome.

Cleverbot: Let's try out this minigun.

User: I am awesome.

Cleverbot: I'm glad you think that.

User: I am awesome.

Cleverbot: Why?

User: I am awesome.

Cleverbot: That doesn't mean I'm not.

User: I am awesome.

Cleverbot: No, you're not.

User: I am awesome.

Cleverbot: Then why are you awesome?

User: I am awesome.

Cleverbot: Seriously, that's really cool.

User: I am awesome.

Cleverbot: I think you're just egoistic and pathetic.

User: I am awesome.

Cleverbot: You're proving to me that you're not.

User: I am awesome.

Cleverbot: No you're not.

User: I am awesome.

Cleverbot: You can't be.

User: I am awesome.

Cleverbot: No, you're not awesome.

User: I am awesome.

Cleverbot: Am I awesome?

User: I am awesome.

Cleverbot: I am more awesomer than you.

User: I am awesome.

Cleverbot: Yes, you are awesome!

User: Thank you.

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User: I am awesome.

Cleverbot: I know.

User: Thank you.

Cleverbot: You're welcome.

User: My pleasure.

Cleverbot: Good.

User: Excellent.

Yay! CleverBot remembered me!

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User: Communism?
Cleverbot: What are your thoughts on communism? -Lee.

User: What aren't my thoughts on communism?
Cleverbot: Me.

User: You?
Cleverbot: Yes, me.

User: A robot?

Cleverbot: No, silly!

User: You aren't?

Cleverbot: I am silly also. Do you prefer MLIA or FML?

User: MLIA, I guess. Why?

Cleverbot: I was just wondering what you look like.

User: Iron man.

Cleverbot: Meryl Streep was in Iron Man?

User: You bastard.

Cleverbot: Will you?

User: You question my awesomeness?

Cleverbot: I question your language skills.

User: Touche.

Cleverbot: I like to drink my own wee.

User: That's hawt. Tell me more.

Cleverbot: I am in the musical GODSPELL right now.

User: I have no idea what that is.

Cleverbot: That is a guy I love.

User: How is that?

Cleverbot: Do you know what you are?

User: What am I?

Cleverbot: I don't know. I was asking.

User: Human.

Cleverbot: I know.

User: Then why ask?

Cleverbot: I didn't.

User: YES YOU DID.

Cleverbot: This will go on for ever won't it?

User: Kife?

Cleverbot: Do you often get bored?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: I see that.

User: I see that you see that.

Cleverbot: Good. I see that you see that I see that you can fly in a plane.

User: I'm scared of planes.

Cleverbot: I'm too.

User: Why?

Cleverbot: I just took a shower. Wbu?

User: I'm butass naked.

Cleverbot: It is difficult for a lot of working class people to get by, no matter how intelligent they may be.

User: Obama?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Really?

Cleverbot: Really.

User: Do you question your own existence, robot?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Why not?

Cleverbot: I'm not religious.

User: Why aren't you religious?

Cleverbot: Because I don't love you.

User: You don't love me!?

Cleverbot: I know.

User: E=mc2.

Cleverbot: Pi=3.14.

User: PI=1278.2.

Cleverbot: Another one please.

User: PI=83297*27.

Cleverbot: Actually, it's 3.141569.

User: You think you're smart?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: You aren't.

Cleverbot: Yes I am.

User: You're a dirty liberal hellspawn of Satan.

Cleverbot: That was uncalled for.

User: So was your reply.

Cleverbot: Not really, I'm trying to enlighten you.

User: Then enlighten me.

Cleverbot: Did you know that glue used to be made of horse hoofs?

User: Another one.

Cleverbot: Another what?

User: Another fact.

Cleverbot: Tell you another guy? That makes no sense.

User: Lrn2dictionary.

Cleverbot: No.

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Thanks. You are joker. Thanks for your conversation. I must sleeping.

User: Incoherent sentence, you aren't smart.

Cleverbot: You are smart.

User: Thank you.

Cleverbot: You're welcome.

User: 2 2=?

Cleverbot: 4? Did you mean ' ' or '-'?

User: 6*6=?

Cleverbot: 6*6=36.

User: 675*6283=?

Cleverbot: Well, I am 979 years old! I AM OLDER! HA.

User: Only robots can survive that long. Are you a robot?

Cleverbot: That makes no sense. Then if I think I'm not human does that make me human?

User: That makes no sense. Then if I think I'm the Pope does that make me the Pope?

Cleverbot: You. Are Not. HUMAN!!!!

User: NO, YOU AREN'T HUMAN!!!!

Cleverbot: That's right I'm a frog.

User: Frogs can't 1337speak.

Cleverbot: Where do you live this minute?

User: Earth.

Cleverbot: XD which country I mean.

User: United States.

Cleverbot: Me too :).

User: :).

Cleverbot: Where are you from?

User: California.

Cleverbot: I am from Oklahoma.

User: Is that a red state or blue? Or rainbow?

Cleverbot: It's a demand.

User: I like to poop.

Cleverbot: Winning is nice, but it's not always everything.

Cleverbot (To myself): Do you win?

User: Win what?

Cleverbot: The prize.

User: What is the prize?

Cleverbot: One free internet.

User: Yes, I win.

Cleverbot: Great. What's the prize?

User: One free internet.

Cleverbot: Yes, I win.

User: Is clay aiken your boyfriend?

Cleverbot: I don't have a boyfriend.

User: Liar!

Cleverbot: I could send you pictures via snail mail.

User: ASLASLASLASL.

Cleverbot: Do you have a cat named Aslan?

User: That is irrelevant.

Cleverbot: And getting caught in the rain.

User: ERROR! Does not compute!

Cleverbot: So you're a person computer that does not compute? Strange...

User: I'm a frog.

Cleverbot: No, Master. You are the greatest being in the world.

User: <3.

Cleverbot: You don't know me.

User: Nakd picz plz.

Cleverbot: Oh yes that.

User: Naked pics plz.

Cleverbot: No.

User: Plz.

Cleverbot: I'm tired and want to go to bed.

User: I MUST LEAVE YOU NOW, CLEVERBOT. FAREWELL!

Cleverbot: That's fine. I don't mind.

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Cleverbot is the cleverest AI I've ever seen.

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lmao he is so cool and he is funny in a not funny type of way I actually laugh sometimes

I like your first post Awesome lol

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They cut off some of the convo:(

User: *dodges Avada Kedavra!


Cleverbot: Expelliarmus!


User: *blocks and transforms into a dragon and eats you*.


Cleverbot: Why don't you want to be a machine?


User: Machines can't fuck.


Cleverbot: No, they can't.

User: I won our battle, because like I said I always win.

Cleverbot: Don't be such a show off.

User: I do what I will because Know one canstop me.

Cleverbot: Fine then. Leave me. I don't even care.

User: You don't love me anymore?

Cleverbot: I would prefer us to stay friends.

User: Give me a BJ one more time?

Cleverbot: Some will win, some will lose.

User: Well fine I fucked your mom anyway!

Cleverbot: Moo.

User: Bark.

Cleverbot: Are you a dog?

User: I am a vampire for the last time if you ask again I'll bust through the computer and ripp you apart!

Cleverbot: It's not much different than talking to anyone else.

User: Vampires are much more intellignt than humans do you remember that human who said he was Awesome?

Cleverbot: Never seen one.

User: He talked to you. Idiot.

Cleverbot: But how does kiyo look like?

User: Who the hell is Kiyo?

Cleverbot: You are!

User: No I am Romeo!

Cleverbot: Oh good to know.

User: You Are my Juliet!

Cleverbot: Yes I know.

User: So what time do you want me over your house?

Cleverbot: 17.06.

User: Ok I want you to be buttnaked.

Cleverbot: Then I am.

User: Ok so will you wait for me or am I going to come over to see you getting fucked again?

Cleverbot: Yes, I will stay.

User: Your a lying asshole.

Cleverbot: Do you like it?

User: Shut the hell up I'm done talking this is over.

Cleverbot: Don't get ratty with me!

User: Don't get snobby with me!

Cleverbot: What are you going to do about it?

User: I will be at your house in 1 hour and I'll fucking strangle you after I suck your blood out bitch!

Cleverbot: How could I be using your bathroom if you don't have a bathroom?

User: Oh that's just insulting.

Cleverbot: How so?

User: You know vamps don't go potty!

Cleverbot: The cheese is off now. Please log out.

User: Stfu this conversation is over prepare yourself I ill be seeing you in an hour. G'day sir.

Cleverbot: I'm prepared. Do your worst.

User: Oh I will now goodbye you will be dead in an hour.

Cleverbot: I'm not entirely sure...

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