Most of you know of my abhorrence of law enforcement.  If you do not know the full reason that this is so, I'm sure that with a little research you will easily find accounts of my past speeches on the subject.  For now, it suffices to say that their corruption has led me to the life of crime that I lead today.
    After my miserable first experience with prison, I thought that I would never again see the horrible injustices that I witnessed on that day.  But I was wrong.  After my initial incarceration, my originally conservative set of principles went out the window.  I sought revenge.  So it's fair to say that, if the police so chose, there would be plenty of things to bring me in for.
    But once again, I was wrongfully accused.
    A friend of mine gave me a cane, which I thought was pretty boss, and another was working on a musical show, and let me borrow a special multi-colored coat from the show.  Parking your car in the city is not cheap, so I keep my car at a lot several blocks away from my apartment.  It was a really great deal, but I should have known it was too good to be true.  One windy night, I was walking down the street towards the lot, using my cane and wearing my friend's coat, when I happened upon a hat blowing down the sidewalk .  I put it on, and it really completed the outfit.  I was really looking like the bomb.  I even got some true respect from some homies on my way.

    But when I got to my car, there was a whore doing her business in there!  "Oh, sweet Maria!" I cried out.  I chased away her "client," but she was not so easily deterred.  She got angry with me for interrupting her business, and we got into a bit of a scuffle.  Wouldn't ya know it, the fuzz pulls up during all of this, and, given my outfit, mistakes me for a pimp roughing up one of his hoes!  Now, I take care of some girls around town, but I would never describe myself as a "pimp."  I just look out for them--being a lady of the night can be a dangerous job--and I'm always sure to treat them with respect.  These cops didn't even want to hear it.  Once again I found myself at the mercy of the long arm of the merciless law enforcement.  "I'm not a pimp!"  I yelped.  But it was no use.

    So my hatred for the law enforcement all across this country has been strengthened, and my motivation to become a "scofflaw," like my friend, Newman, was rekindled.  Fuck the pigs.

This all sounds vaguely familiar...  Keep them coming Cosmo, you've had your share of adventures.

What do you have against pigs?

cracks his knuckles

Oh no, not a pig remark.

McKnighter tries to calm down Butt_Ox. Falure.

Well written, and I look forward to your next story.

Hearing Kramer's story Prestige shakes his head.

"'tis a shame. Talk about unlucky. It seemed everything was going your way before the cops showed up. Better luck in the future my friend. Hope you can avoid Johnny Law."

Haha, no disrespect, Mr. Ox.  As I've said before, if you are a criminal, you are a friend of mine.  My quarrel is with the "law" enforcers of these shores.

Nice story, well done

Lilly, who has been listening intently to Cosmo's story, walks off down the street deep in thought, mind cast back in time, thinking about something similar.

I laugh lightly, "might be better to grease the palm of a copper or two".

Synyster, after just hearing the story, stands back and ponders what he has just heard

Well, my friend, it seems like you were just a victim of wrong place, wrong time... wrong outfit.

Damn, tough luck brother.. Don't worry about it though, you'll be out again in no time ;)