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| Mafia Roast (SpikeS) | Started by: WiggleButt on Jan 08, '16 17:17 |
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Here we are, another day another Roast. Please remember that this is all in good fun. The attacks that are made are to be taken out of humour not direct attacks. Will I be kind? No. Will I be vulgar? Abso-fucking-lutely!! Thank you for gathering here today to speak about SpikeS and his incapabilities. Not only as a Mafioso, but in the bedroom and whatever else he screws up on a daily basis. SpikeS we all know your the man of the intel world, but I bet you didn't see this coming did you? It's kind of like not being able to tell when Cordelia is faking an orgasm. SpikeS bloodline has been around for some time. Years upon years of hard work involving his ancestory, you may not know this because his hard work has never really amounted to much. Rather similar to the amount of work I put into gettig women between the sheets, not much at all. Please don't be jealous, its all in the hips. SpikeS knowledge is so useless, that even the silk glove turned him away. SpikeS likes to wear his heart on his sleeve, he will do what he can for anyone, unless it involves actual work. If only it was ability that he wore on his sleeve. Somehow, SpikeS still manages to have followers. Whatever Aura he emits, it sure does attract people to work their tail off for him. While in Detroit Ronin had his head so far up SpikeS ass he was able to tell me when SpikeS had pasta for dinner. Last week it was Alfredo. I know I'm being a bit harsh, being a bit too strong, much like the smell that arises from his undergarments when Whoreable asks him out on a date. SpikeS is actually the lovechild of KingRevan and HenriDucard. Well at least now we know whats the blame for his issues in the bedroom. Silent and unsuccessful. I wrote a poem for you SpikeS: In the air there arose a smell, As harsh as it was I knew it so well, It wasn't the fart I let out after tacos, Or the scent on my thighs after a night with Dollface in her condos, No it was the smell of smelly socks in the air, The smell of disappointment until SpikeS grows a pair. Yes. That was about as successful as a takedown operated by SpikeS. I apologize for the lack of ability, but hey at least it Rhymed! In all seriousness SpikeS you know I love you and your lack of meaning. Our ancestory goes back longer then my journals show. History wouldn't be the same without you and your bloodlines abilities to continuously be as successful as they become. It's really a representation of who you are. Your bloodlines accomplishments can never be questioned as they serve their place in history. Even if they were pure luck! Thank you for being a champion and sitting here allowing me to drag you through the mud deeper then Jake_Ballard balls deep in Emoney 's mom. Which I suppose isn't very deep given Jakes size. Now I leave the podium unattended for anyone who'd like to partake in the glorious bashing this lovely afternoon. Much love old friend. |
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JackRuby claps after such a fine speech, but he wouldn't help but yell aloud. "Where the hell is turkey bear mentioned in any of this?!" |
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| Reply by: JackRuby at Jan 08, '16 17:27 | |
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Rae wanders by and picks up SpikeS and puts him in the corner before wandering off. |
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| Reply by: Rayln at Jan 08, '16 17:29 | |
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Jack sits in the back of the room, listening to the other members of the public roasting Godfather SpikeS. He sits there, and just listens. Dying to get his own two cents in for his roast of Godfather SpikeS, he orders another whiskey and remains quiet. Jack knew when to hold his tongue, and while he thought very highly of Spike, he dared not say anything in case it was taken in the wrong way. When Jack's drink arrived, he tipped the waitress and drank up. He remained silent for the remainder of the night, laughed at everything that was being said about this brilliant man. |
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| Reply by: JackFranco at Jan 09, '16 11:57 | |
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