Got any good ones?  I just got this one today.. LOL

Little
Johnny and it is near the end of the school year

The
teacher has turned in her  grades. There is really nothing
to do. All the kids are restless because  there is nothing
to do and it is near the end of the day.
 
The
teacher says, "Whoever answers the questions I ask first
and  correctly can leave early today." Little Johnny says
to himself,

 "Good,
I want to  get outta here. I'm smart and will answer the
question".
 
The teacher asked, "Who said 'Four Score
and Seven Years Ago'?" Before  Johnny could open his
mouth,

Susie
said, "Abraham Lincoln". The teacher  said, "That's right
Susie. You can go". Johnny was MAD. Susie answered
first.
 
The teacher asked, "Who said, 'I Have a
Dream'?" Before Johnny could open his mouth, Mary said, "Martin
Luther King".

The
teacher said, "That's  right Mary. You can go". Johnny was
even MADDER than before. Mary  answered
first.
 
The teacher asked, "Who said 'Ask not, what
your country can do for  you'?" Before Johnny could open
his mouth, Nancy said, "John Kennedy".

The
teacher said, "That's right Nancy. You can go". Johnny was
BOILING MAD.  Nancy answered first.
 
Then the
teacher turned her back, and Johnny said, "I wish these bitches
would keep their mouths shut".
 
   
The teacher asked, "WHO SAID THAT?"
 
  Johnny
said, "TIGER WOODS! CAN I GO NOW?"

Hahahahahaha cool

what goes into 13 twice ?



Michael Jackson

The day the Faucet girl died, she went to heaven and God looked at her and said, "Anyone who comes to heaven gets one wish, but it can only be used for good, and you can't resurrect yourself"

She thought, and said, "I wish every little boy and girl in the world would be a little bit safer"

And then Michael Jackson died

Everyday people used to say "I wish the country was a little bit better." then bush got out of office.

To this day, when im playing an online first person shooter on Xbox and i get killed i always say "Dammit, i just got Heath Ledgered"

LMAO!!!! ^^^^^