Drexl rolls out to tha street with more 9's than Star Fleet, knowudimsayin?

Yo check this out. I was hanging out at the good Godfather Lucretia's Den of Sin Casino in Las Vegas, playing Roulette and shit with my boys, when I saw this broad Rhiannon I know sitting across the table. I wasn't doing well at the tables that night, and Rhiannon being the sweetheart that she is said "You look like you could use a hug". I ain't one for hugging or any type of public affection but I was pretty liquored up so we hugged.

Sneaky broad that she is, she reaches into my back pocket and lifts $5000. I was mad as a motherfucker. My boys were clowining me too, which made me angrier. I was so mad I shot the blackjack dealer on my way out the door. Godfather Lucretia wasn't too happy about that one and was gonna ban me, but being that I consistantly lose a lot of money at her casino, she waived the ban and opted to allow me to continue lining her pockets with my lousy gambling skills.

The next day one of my boys came by the HQ with a shirt that said "Don't pickpocket me of it will result in your death". He said that would keep people from stealing my money. I said "I ain't wearing this stupid shit!" and wiped my ass wit the shirt and threw it in the trash. MF's that wear those shirts look like fools, and Drexl ain't tryna look like no fool.

Regardless I did need to do something to protect my hard-earned blood money, so I decided to bank ALL my shit. I figure they got Federal Banks on just about every corner, so if I need money in a hurry I could always just make a withdrawel... forced or otherwise.

Bottom line is I gotta keep myself sharp. These streets is full of criminals, none of whom can keep their hands out of other people's pockets. I come from a long line of disciplined Mafioso that made a habit of banking their shit. So I come to these streets with a proposal that will help keep me on my toes.

If any of you motherfuckers pickpocket me for $5000, I'll pay you $100,000. I'll even come back out to this corner and announce who was successful. This way if I get my shit stolen I ain't got nobody to blame but my goddam self. Only catch? If you got one of them goofy "No PP" shirts on, you don't get shit other than the $5000 you were lucky enough to steal off me. Sound fair? Cool. I'm out. Gotta head to the bank and deposit my cash.

DAMN that Drexl is one crazy motherfucker! Looks like he done lost his mind! Keep on keepin' on, Drex. You got style

I don't see the need of commenting on what you just said because this has been discussed many times before, whether people moaning about the useless 5k or others setting rules that they be asked first before they get pickpocketed (what the hell is that? I have no idea)
but I feel the need to ask a questions sir if you don't mind, did you just have that long-talk speech to tell us you're offering 100k for whomever successfully pickpocket you and get $5,000?
{$}ilvio

Drexl receives word that Silvio has asked a question regardling his recent proposal and decides to respond in letter-form. He grabs his gold-pen and jots down his reply on casino stationary

Dear Silvio,

Yes

Sincerely,

Drexl

Q_Legacy laughs to himself as he passes Drexl ranting about pickpocketing but stops to listen when he hears something about paying $100,000

I like a challenge, Drexl.  I don't often reach into people's pockets for some extra cash but since you've decided to spice things up a bit I'll have to see if I can benefit from this.

He wanders off, eye-balling Drexl and debating the perfect time to strike with a quick money grab

Drexl, I shall find you wondering these streets one day soon. Consider this game on man.

Game on indeed, not that i really need the 100k or anything, but i like a challenge:)

i'll find you one day :)

Mo' diggity, my Friends. I welcome your attempts at my pockets and wish you all the very best of luck. Apparently I have touched a nerve of some people who have misinterpreted my speech as a 'rant on pickpocketing'. My entire Family tree is pickpocket-friendly and always has been. My 'rant' was merely how I chose to present my proposal to the masses. I suppose I have no choice but to admit that my 'long-talk speech' earlier was a complete work of fiction. Rhiannon did not pickpocket me at Godfather Lucretia's Casino, nor did we hug there, nor did I shoot one of The Godfather's blackjack dealers. I have been exposed as the liar that I am.

To Silvio's point, I would like to beg everybody's pardon for having the audacity to incorporate a made up pickpocketing story into my street proposal. I suppose I have beaten a dead-horse. Indeed I could have shortened my discussion drastically by simply proclaiming "100k to anyone that lifts $5000 from me" and walking off. Apparently we just have different ideas of what makes for an interesting street speech.

Drexl eyeballs the mobsters on the corner with great paranoia, covering his back pocket with his ring-studded hand protecting it from the money-hungry masses

Jan 24, '10 16:46 [NAME DELETED] tried to PICKPOCKET you.

Damn, that was a close one too. I had just withdrawn my money to buy some drugs. Missed me by one second. Looks like even when I'm cautious I'm still vulnerable to getting my wallet lifted

Drexl runs back to his HQ to lay low, glad that he did not have to shell out 100k to this mobster who shall remain nameless.... not this time at least

Sounds cool but would be very annoting if it happended to you.