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The Life Of Jesus: Getting On The Boat Started by: JesusAtheistus on Jun 27, '16 10:06

Jesus liked living in the old country, it was always warm and people were very nice. Of course there was this minor annoyance called Benito "Il Duce" Mussolini, although his last name sounds like a delicious dish he's actually quite an asshole. When Jesus was a young boy his father told him all about "This Thing Of Ours", a secret code for a secret group of very powerful, very respected people of which his family had been part for generations. Jesus promised his dad he would also become part of the Cosa Nostra, and boy did he do everything to keep that promise.

When Mussolini decided it was time for Cosa Nostra to stop being a thing papà Jesus bought a ticket to the USA. But he was to old and too sick to make the trip so he gave his sweet ragazzino Jesus the ticket so he could "Go teach those fucking yanks what honor and duty means." So Jesus did, Jesus always listened to papà. He took the first ship to the USA and was dreaming big. He'd get the commision to grant him te permission to start his own family, he'd make the Atheistus family grand, majestic and rightous.He'd have tens of capo's, he'd rule all the major shipping cities, he'd become the king of the underworld. By this time Jesus had not yet realised that the USA already had a lot of famillies that were in many ways more violent than the Sicilian ones. But he'd find out soon enough.

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